- 87,603
- Rule 12
- GTP_Famine
Okay, let's establish one thing at the outset. I like Bond films. If it so pleaseth the jury, I liked the Bourne films too (#3 more than the others, but that's another story). I must have seen them all at least twice - even Never Say Never Again, which was so bad that it caused an outbreak of West Nile Virus.
And let's establish a second thing while we're at it. Craig is Bond. I know he's only done two (so far), but he's set the new benchmark Bond (though they all have their charms - the closest Bond to Craig's is Dalton's, but he had other... flaws). Craig does Bond as the cold, nasty, single-minded, soul-less bastard he is - and he's aware that he's protecting a society he could never be a part of.
So. Quantum of Solace.
Excluding the aforementioned Never Say Never Again - which is never regarded as a true canon Bond film - this is the worst Bond film ever.
Oh yes, you read that right. Daniel Craig is the best James Bond, but QoS is the worst.
"But Famine... What the hell are you talking about, you crouton?"
Well, it's like this.
The script is awful - it's telegraphed in places (no spoilers, but when they namecheck a random guy standing about, it's clear he's about to do something to develop the plot), it's confusing in others (I watched the whole thing, without interruption and still didn't catch any mention of "The Tierra Project" which suddenly popped out of Bond's mouth) and it's massively stereotyped (loud, brash American operative will get into bed with murdering evil squiffy-eyed tosspot for some oil).
The cinematography itself is absolutely shocking. Apparently it was all filmed on hand-held cameras by the Moscow State One-Legged Pogoing Epileptic Earthquake Circus. And stitched together by a guy who really, really likes long shots and close-ups and can't decide which he prefers and has ADHD. I noted also, with chagrin, that, during the rooftop chase Bond had apparently forgotten his parkour skills, used so extensively during Casino Royale
And I know there's product placement. And I know there was a big "green" push for the film. But I don't need to see close-ups of Ford Motor Company brand badges and "HYDROGEN power" every 2nd scene. I can tell, without the hint, that there's a Land Rover there, and a Ford Bronco (in Bolivia? *shrug*).
And the plot. Ohh, the plot. Gold? Diamonds? Diamonds to make a big laser? A big space laser? A big space station and some people in spacesuits with lasers? Nuclear weapons? Hell, terrorists even? Nope - it's the aforementioned squiffy-eyed tosspot who gets some land on the pretence that it's worthless, pretends that it's worth something and actually... mumble mumble... brrrrrrbbdrr... the thing... nnnmmmhmm... some dams.
There were likeable things. The Goldfinger homage. M at home. Some explosions. Hell, the actors in the most part - and Craig especially. But the whole thing felt cheap.
Craig's a great Bond. He just needs to be in a great film. As an afterthought, how about remaking OHMSS - which was a superb Bond film with utterly dreadful acting (and I'm pointing at you, Savalas and Rigg - with the current cast? And some camera stabilisers, for pity's sakes.
Summary in 10 words or less: Best Bond let down by everything else.
Rating? Blunt Force Trauma.
And let's establish a second thing while we're at it. Craig is Bond. I know he's only done two (so far), but he's set the new benchmark Bond (though they all have their charms - the closest Bond to Craig's is Dalton's, but he had other... flaws). Craig does Bond as the cold, nasty, single-minded, soul-less bastard he is - and he's aware that he's protecting a society he could never be a part of.
So. Quantum of Solace.
Excluding the aforementioned Never Say Never Again - which is never regarded as a true canon Bond film - this is the worst Bond film ever.
Oh yes, you read that right. Daniel Craig is the best James Bond, but QoS is the worst.
"But Famine... What the hell are you talking about, you crouton?"
Well, it's like this.
The script is awful - it's telegraphed in places (no spoilers, but when they namecheck a random guy standing about, it's clear he's about to do something to develop the plot), it's confusing in others (I watched the whole thing, without interruption and still didn't catch any mention of "The Tierra Project" which suddenly popped out of Bond's mouth) and it's massively stereotyped (loud, brash American operative will get into bed with murdering evil squiffy-eyed tosspot for some oil).
The cinematography itself is absolutely shocking. Apparently it was all filmed on hand-held cameras by the Moscow State One-Legged Pogoing Epileptic Earthquake Circus. And stitched together by a guy who really, really likes long shots and close-ups and can't decide which he prefers and has ADHD. I noted also, with chagrin, that, during the rooftop chase Bond had apparently forgotten his parkour skills, used so extensively during Casino Royale
And I know there's product placement. And I know there was a big "green" push for the film. But I don't need to see close-ups of Ford Motor Company brand badges and "HYDROGEN power" every 2nd scene. I can tell, without the hint, that there's a Land Rover there, and a Ford Bronco (in Bolivia? *shrug*).
And the plot. Ohh, the plot. Gold? Diamonds? Diamonds to make a big laser? A big space laser? A big space station and some people in spacesuits with lasers? Nuclear weapons? Hell, terrorists even? Nope - it's the aforementioned squiffy-eyed tosspot who gets some land on the pretence that it's worthless, pretends that it's worth something and actually... mumble mumble... brrrrrrbbdrr... the thing... nnnmmmhmm... some dams.
There were likeable things. The Goldfinger homage. M at home. Some explosions. Hell, the actors in the most part - and Craig especially. But the whole thing felt cheap.
Craig's a great Bond. He just needs to be in a great film. As an afterthought, how about remaking OHMSS - which was a superb Bond film with utterly dreadful acting (and I'm pointing at you, Savalas and Rigg - with the current cast? And some camera stabilisers, for pity's sakes.
Summary in 10 words or less: Best Bond let down by everything else.
Rating? Blunt Force Trauma.