Pun Alert! Pun Alert!

  • Thread starter Mike Rotch
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Mike Rotch

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a. Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.

b. A backward poet writes inverse.

c. A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

d. Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

e. Practice safe eating - always use condiments.

f. Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

g. A man needs a mistress just to break the monogamy.

h. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

i. Dancing cheek-to-cheek is really a form of floor play.

j. Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

k. Condoms should be used on every conceivable occasion.

l. Reading while sunbathing makes you well red.

m. When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

n. A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two tired.

o. What's the definition of a will? (It's a dead giveaway.)

p. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

q. In democracy your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes.

r. She was engaged to a boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off.

s. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.

t. If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.

u. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.

v. When a clock is hungry, it goes back four seconds.

w. The man who fell into an upholstery machine is fully recovered.

x. You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.

y. Local Area Network in Australia: the LAN down under.

z. He often broke into song because he couldn't find the key.

aa. Every calendar's days are numbered.

ab. A lot of money is tainted - 'taint yours and 'taint mine.

ac. A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

ad. He had a photographic memory that was never developed.

ae. A plateau is a high form of flattery.

af. A midget fortune-teller who escapes from prison is a small medium at large.

ag. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

ah. Once you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

ai. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

aj. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.

ak. Acupuncture is a jab well done.
 
Dijon vu - the same race track as before.

There's a few good ones there - "If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed" and "Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana" being two favourites
 
hmm...change the thread title to Big Pun alert. great rapper if you haven't heard him. too bad he's dead...he had a LOT of potential
 
Some say thread revival is annoying, some say it binds and weaves a new line of history through the books of :gtplanet:!

:gtpflag:

I really like puns, so had I had to revive this thread! I want to hear some more of GTP's creativity in puns!

Hey, I used my search features for once! ;)
 
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TB
Mine are too! So I try to keep to keep them basic..

EDIT: I would like to see a few puns about GT6, but most of them would probably be about how the cars didn't Fit there style from the get-go!
 
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I just love these(puns) guys!

I have a thing for yo-yo's. But, my interest goes up and down depending on if it is close to my birthday or not!

Seriously though, every 10-14 months, my interest is extremly high!
 
I will give you what you want when I die.
 
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