Turkmenistan Bans Black Cars, Because its President Likes White Ones

[GTPNewsWire]

This is the discussion thread for a recent post on GTPlanet:

Turkmenistan Bans Black Cars, Because its President Likes White Ones

This article was published by Andrew Evans (@Famine) on January 5th, 2018 in the Car Culture category.

 

[Lukanyon]

That's racist!!!

 

[SlipZtrEm]

#BlackCarsMatter

 

[Fredzy]

Unfortunately, having the right car color ranks very low on the list of challenging obstacles to being a living, non-imprisoned human being in Turkmenistan.

 

[Famine]

White privilege!

 

[GT5 Level 41]

U2 bashing is so 2017.

 

[Famine]

U2 bashing is so 2017.

I've been hating on U2 since nineteen snickerty ump and I'm not stopping now.

 

[Obelisk]

...What? No, really, what?

 

[TexRex]

Gurbanguly Berdimukhamedow

Say that ten times fast.

 

[jaytmtb]

This is the first time I've ever heard of Turkmenistan, and this Gurbanguly Berdimukhamedow must
be a mate of Kim Jong Un, banning black cars, pure mental

 

[Joey D]

#BlackCarsMatter

#AllCarsMatter

 

[SleezyBigSlim]

White privilege!

This is a racist comment.

 

[DesertPenguin]

Yea but what shade of black?

@Lessen

 

[samdu]

Say that ten times fast.

I can't say it once, slowly.

 

[photonrider]

I'd rather mine be red - and not just in black and white.

 

[Sharpie]

Amazing.

 

[Kobhalt]

I would understand his point of view (by living in Paris, every car you can see is rather black/white/grey) but isn't it a bit extreme?

 

[CHEN255]

This is why anyone from a lowly police officer to the highest politician cannot be trusted with the power they have and must be under the closest of scrutiny at all times. A lot of joking about this but I am truly sick to my stomach reading about this tyrant and his power trip.

 

[TexRex]

All this talk of Turkmenistan, I can't help but think of that episode of Archer.

 

[Famine]

This is a racist comment.

 

[TetsuKobura]

#BlackCarsMatter

DAMNIT I literally came here to post this

 

[Eggstor]

An idea so bad even California rejected it (after serious consideration).

 

[RACECAR]

So I read the article and find this:

Former President Saparmurat Niyazov once banned dogs, lip-syncing, opera and make-up for newsreaders. He also renamed days of the week, months and years after himself and his family, and had a 50-foot, gold-plated statue of himself made that rotated to always face the sun.

Has this country always had leaders this ridiculous with their Opulence?

 

[Northstar]

So I read the article and find this:



Has this country always had leaders this ridiculous with their Opulence?

Niyazov has been the only other "president" since it became an independent country in 1991. Prior to that it was a part of Mother Russia's grand plan.

 

[TexRex]

Has this country always had leaders this ridiculous with their Opulence?

As it sits now? Yes. Those are the only two presidents Turkmenistan has had. Before 1991, when it was Turkmen Soviet Socialist Republic? No idea.

 

[Famine]

So I read the article and find this:

Has this country always had leaders this ridiculous with their Opulence?

You don't know the half of it with Niyazov.

He renamed days of the week, months and even random things after himself and his family. He literally abolished the Turkmen word for bread, and replaced it with his mother's name. That may have been awkward, as he also renamed April for her...

He also wrote a book called "Ruhnama", which was basically his Bible with him as the star and a vision of ideal Turkmen life. He decreed should be mandatory teaching in schools, part of the driving test and candidates in job interviews should be tested on it. He put forward the idea that diligent students of Ruhnama would get into heaven simply through reading it enough, because he made a deal with god.

There's a fifty-foot high statue of Ruhnama in Ashgabat. It opens up, like a book. Really.


Incidentally, Berdimukhamedow drives a green Bugatti Veyron.

​

 

[Eggstor]

Incidentally, Berdimukhamedow drives a green Bugatti Veyron.

​

Green is money, which is better than luck.

 

[TexRex]

Berdimukhamedow

So...have you decided not to copy anything else for the foreseeable future, do you plan to copy-paste as needed, or did you actually commit the proper spelling to memory? Just wondering.

 

[Ledbetter]

I feel slightly, but only slightly, less disappointed in my own government.

 

[Famine]

So...have you decided not to copy anything else for the foreseeable future, do you plan to copy-paste as needed, or did you actually commit the proper spelling to memory. Just wondering.​

There's at least three alternate, accepted ways of spelling it too

Berdimukhamedow seems to be the current accepted form, but he previously used a double-m (Berdimukhammedow) and randomly stopped at some point after he became president. As the language is a) Cyrillic and b) Literally reinvented by Niyazov in Ruhnama, other versions use a v (Berdimukhamedov) or a y (Berdymukhamedow). And of course there's any mix of those versions.

For fun, both Niyazov and Berdimukhamedow gave themselves ludicrous honorifics that are official titles. Niyazov was Saparmurat Niyazov Turkmenbasy ("head of the Turkmen"), while our hero is Gurbanguly Berdimukhamedow Arkadag ("protector").


And while amusing, they are basically North Korea levels of a cult of personality.