- 2,767
Guide to proper debates in the opinions forum v1.0
Well, since there are sticky guidelines threads for many forums around here, I figured that after 25000 posts (woot woot!), it's about time we get one for the opinions forums, don't you all think?
So for starters here, here are some tips to help you strongly make your point around here.
1. Name calling
That is one of the oldest tricks in the world, and a very successful one too. By repetively reminding your opponent, over a long period of time, hom much of a ****bag he really is, there's a good chances he'll finally get it! There lies the foundation of a mutual comprehension, and many notorious agreements have been made this way over time. For beginners, using "Idiot" or "tool" is a good place to start before getting into more advanced and educated terms.
To quote Socrates:
"Do not do to others what angers you if done to you by others, you stupid tools"
Only once he understood how much of a brain-depraved ****head he was that Plato became one of his follower.
Why go JohnBM01's way when you can make an effortless, concise point like:
"You're just a ****ing liberal democrat wussie."
"Stop being a fat blood-thirsty warmongering ass, for god's sake."
Advanced techniques of this include insulting third-party groups, or other nations to make the speaker realize that he's better off not being like them.
Now go pratice a little, you brainless turds. (see?) Master this one and I promise you'll pwn all over the place.👍
2. Cite great sources
Since your disagreeing (and stupid) opponent is most likely incapable of forming his own thoughts by himself (well, duh, he disagrees with you!), you can help him to finally get over the oxygen deprivation his brain had after birth by giving him well recognized, neutral sources of information and places to look at for unbiased information that he'll quickly swallow.
Examples of this:
"Haven't you seen Farenheit 911, you dumb fat slug?"
"Well, maybe. But Bill O'Reily said tonight that 68.2% of Canadians have had sexual intercourse with a beaver in 2003."
3. Repetion
Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!
4. Facts vs Opinions.
Constantly remind the disagreeing twit how your opinions are based on facts, as opposed to his lame verbally diarrhetics attemps at making a point. In the meantime don't worry about giving him facts to prove this, since he's already destabilized by this offensive, you won't actually have to find facts to prove it. Nice isn't it?
5. Spellcheck
Also, To effortlessly help the audience recognize that your opinion is the only valid one around, point a few spelling/grammatical mistakes made by your oppent is one of the best way to prove him wrong. You have bonus points for this if the other person's first language is not english. ppl writing liek d1s ar 0k tho becoz its k00l!.
6. Golden rule
Never forget that hey, you are right, and they are wrong. Period. 👍
7. If your opponent has you cornered, just run away!
You can beat any argument simply by not responding! The best feature of this indispensable tactic is that since your opponent is too dimwitted to see your point of view, he'll probably just forget the fact that he's just shot a bigger hole in your logic than a screened door on a submarine!
A subtle, but also effective variant on this is to concentrate on disputing irrelevant details of the supporting argument. Do this by quoting everything except the part of his argument that's giving you trouble. Home in on the minutia to distract the idiot from realizing he does indeed have you over a barrel. Then sit back as he fields every penny-ante little complaint you can come up with!
Don't forget to return to the thread weeks or even months later and remind everyone how right you were. See Rule 6.
Example: Some savage twit is trying to explain to you the Earth is round. If he cites the old "ships disappear over the horizon" hoopla, just point out that the evil corporations who control world shipping have a vested interest in enforcing their view of what shape the world is on the masses. If he cites satellite imaging, just counter it by saying satellites are a scam and a hoax, as any good conspiracy theorist can prove. Soon, he'll get so tired of trying to prove his point, that he will simply resort to Rule 1, making you the winner by default! It's just that easy!
pssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhh.....
Well, since there are sticky guidelines threads for many forums around here, I figured that after 25000 posts (woot woot!), it's about time we get one for the opinions forums, don't you all think?
So for starters here, here are some tips to help you strongly make your point around here.
1. Name calling
That is one of the oldest tricks in the world, and a very successful one too. By repetively reminding your opponent, over a long period of time, hom much of a ****bag he really is, there's a good chances he'll finally get it! There lies the foundation of a mutual comprehension, and many notorious agreements have been made this way over time. For beginners, using "Idiot" or "tool" is a good place to start before getting into more advanced and educated terms.
To quote Socrates:
"Do not do to others what angers you if done to you by others, you stupid tools"
Only once he understood how much of a brain-depraved ****head he was that Plato became one of his follower.
Why go JohnBM01's way when you can make an effortless, concise point like:
"You're just a ****ing liberal democrat wussie."
"Stop being a fat blood-thirsty warmongering ass, for god's sake."
Advanced techniques of this include insulting third-party groups, or other nations to make the speaker realize that he's better off not being like them.
Now go pratice a little, you brainless turds. (see?) Master this one and I promise you'll pwn all over the place.👍
2. Cite great sources
Since your disagreeing (and stupid) opponent is most likely incapable of forming his own thoughts by himself (well, duh, he disagrees with you!), you can help him to finally get over the oxygen deprivation his brain had after birth by giving him well recognized, neutral sources of information and places to look at for unbiased information that he'll quickly swallow.
Examples of this:
"Haven't you seen Farenheit 911, you dumb fat slug?"
"Well, maybe. But Bill O'Reily said tonight that 68.2% of Canadians have had sexual intercourse with a beaver in 2003."
3. Repetion
Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!Thoroughly repeat your thoughts on the issue (no real need to actually add something new to them), at least 10 times each over a thread. Over time, your opponent will become accustomed to hear your point, he'll finally get it. An advantage of this technique is that since it has already been demonstrated that your opponent has the IQ of a rocking chair, you may also try to copy/paste them from previous posts, for a time-savvy debate!
4. Facts vs Opinions.
Constantly remind the disagreeing twit how your opinions are based on facts, as opposed to his lame verbally diarrhetics attemps at making a point. In the meantime don't worry about giving him facts to prove this, since he's already destabilized by this offensive, you won't actually have to find facts to prove it. Nice isn't it?
5. Spellcheck
Also, To effortlessly help the audience recognize that your opinion is the only valid one around, point a few spelling/grammatical mistakes made by your oppent is one of the best way to prove him wrong. You have bonus points for this if the other person's first language is not english. ppl writing liek d1s ar 0k tho becoz its k00l!.
6. Golden rule
Never forget that hey, you are right, and they are wrong. Period. 👍
7. If your opponent has you cornered, just run away!
You can beat any argument simply by not responding! The best feature of this indispensable tactic is that since your opponent is too dimwitted to see your point of view, he'll probably just forget the fact that he's just shot a bigger hole in your logic than a screened door on a submarine!
A subtle, but also effective variant on this is to concentrate on disputing irrelevant details of the supporting argument. Do this by quoting everything except the part of his argument that's giving you trouble. Home in on the minutia to distract the idiot from realizing he does indeed have you over a barrel. Then sit back as he fields every penny-ante little complaint you can come up with!
Don't forget to return to the thread weeks or even months later and remind everyone how right you were. See Rule 6.
Example: Some savage twit is trying to explain to you the Earth is round. If he cites the old "ships disappear over the horizon" hoopla, just point out that the evil corporations who control world shipping have a vested interest in enforcing their view of what shape the world is on the masses. If he cites satellite imaging, just counter it by saying satellites are a scam and a hoax, as any good conspiracy theorist can prove. Soon, he'll get so tired of trying to prove his point, that he will simply resort to Rule 1, making you the winner by default! It's just that easy!
pssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhh.....
©jpmontoya 2004
Credits: Mike Rotch (#5) , ///M-Spec (#7)
Very Fitting. And i'm guilty of a few i see. It was just SOOO hard not to call ex-member wellyrn an Idiot, or moron, or retard. I think i'm doing better though.
(Should I?) Sometime you could say that it's a combination of the universal rule 6 and trying to avoid Rule 3 though. 
Depends on how you look at it. I'll do my best to avoid both situations.
