A:
And the best part is…we replaced him with another underwhelming German!
B:
In regards to our next driver, he or she must be this tall. No exceptions.
C:
Without a bowl to put the keys into, phones on the table would have to do.
D:
...and after I took a wad of cash from Dmitry this big, I fired him and his son!
E:
"And then I told him 'I don't recall saying good luck'."
F:
Steiner: Patting your head and rubbing your stomach at the same time is no bother, see.
Red-haired journalist: That's not your head...
Steiner: Yeah, and it's not my stomach either.
G:
Here Guenther sings "All I Want For Christmas Is You" causing nose- and ear bleeds for some journalists.
H:
Grampa Guenther has fallen asleep again mid story
I:
I'm telling you the stack of repair bills from those 2 was actually this high!
Bahrain
Leclerc: No Christian don't! You have so much to live for!
Sainz: Do a flip!
Saudi Arabia
Gordon Ramsay finally shows his appreciation to the man who never overcooks his tires.
Australia
"Hands up which one of you actually has any talent?"
Emilia-Romagna
Tests of the proposed Bodywork Reduction System were a smashing success.
Miami
Practice for “Drive to Survive” the musical ongoing.
Spain
Williams are going to do well today, or dye trying.
Monaco
Mick Schumacher denies his preparations for Monaco were half-Haased.
Azerbaijan
Vettel is very pleased with his new Tickle Me Esteban doll.
Canada 1
Alonso tries to remember where the front row of the grid is.
Canada 2
El Cid with a lid falls mainly down the grid.
United Kingdom
It's a good thing neither are at the sharp end of the grid.
Austria
Yuki gives his approval for AlphaTauri's latest update: a booster seat.
France
Everyone runs for their life as Ferrari's Chief Strategist escapes his cage
Hungary
The hottest video game of the year is finally released - Goat Simulator 2
Belgium
After a paddock visit from Ferrari CEO Benedetto Vigna, Toto Wolff nearly trips over all that remains of Mattia Binotto...
Netherlands
Yes, Yuki, just park it right there. Dank je wel.
Italy 1
Ohhh, who's holding a Mobius trophy up in the air? SpongeGeorge Squarepants!
Italy 2
George Russell:
"I understand that, without my agreement, Nickelodeon have put out a press release late this afternoon that I am voicing SpongeBob Squarepants for them next year. This is wrong and I have not signed a contract with Nickelodeon for 2023. I will not be voicing any character for Nickelodeon next year."
Italy 3
Once again kowtowing to its puritanical Saudi audiences and sponsors, F1 TV finds a unique way of censoring out George Russell's bikini bottoms.
Singapore
When Alpha Tauri said they wanted to emulate Verstappen they didn't have Jos Verstappen in mind.
Japan
The new Alfa Romeo Spyder didn't quite have the impact the bosses had hoped.
United States
Have you got enough meatballs to make Gunther dinner yet?
Mexico City
"WoOoOoHhH, WaTcH oUt FoR tHe ChIlLiEs"
"Go away, I'm busy"
"YoU'rE gOiNg To Be BeAtEn"
"You can't scare me"
"VaLtTeRi It'S jAmEs!"
"AAAAAARRRRGHHHHHHHH"
Sao Paulo
Verstappen: What's that, number two «crrrrkkh»? I can't hear you «zzzchkrr». There's some kind of «cchhhkkrr» ference on the radi «zzzcchkrr»
Perez: You know that doesn't work face to face, right?
Abu Dhabi 1
And the best part is…we replaced him with another underwhelming German!
Abu Dhabi 2
...and after I took a wad of cash from Dmitry this big, I fired him and his son!