Gran Turismo 5 Presents: "Real Men of Genius"

[Masi_23]

(This is in reference to punters inside the online public lobbies)


(Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you - Mr. Driver who punts everyone on every corner.
(Mr. Driver who punts everyone on every corner)
Nothing satisfies you more than a tap on the a-ss on everyone you set your sights on.
When you're just a car length behind, God bless, it's every man for himself.
(Back off that's mine!)
As you fly-by with your Fab Pink Clio, you feel that no one can harm you to the finish.
Cause no one ever gets the chance.
(Watch out it's a sand trap!)
You've got nothing to hide Bumpbob Squareintheass, as you always say,
friends don't let friends apex early.
(Ooo, who's your daddy!?)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, Ace Driver...
Cause we know, you don't follow where the path may lead, instead,
you go where there is no path and leave a trail.
(Mr. Driver who punts everyone on every corner)


If you don't getsss, here's some of the original



Submit your own!

 

[W3H5]

I don't get it. What's in the vid/pic? Won't show up on my PC.

 

[ICallShotgun]

This is inspired work. Very nice

 

[savage388]

I don't get it. What's in the vid/pic? Won't show up on my PC.

It's based on an american series of commercials on tv for the beer bud light.
But by far the funniest post I've ever read, it should be put in some sort of hall of fame

 

[parabulla]

👍 Great post, don't think I could contribute anything nearly that good.

 

[Masi_23]

Thanks fellas

Anyone with their own?

 

[Starfirebird]

Nice post man.👍👍👍

I loved the Bud Light commercials and this post ranks right up there with them.

 

[CSLACR]

I don't know which is better, the commercials or the GT version.
But in any case, you made tears come to my eyes.

 

[Masi_23]

lol... thanks!

By the way, if anyone can produce a video that coincides with the words, that would be awesome ;D

 

[Midnight Snacks]

That was boss.

 

[taz]

That post was awesome, funniest thing I've read all week, I want to contribute but I don't think I can come up with some that good right now. Keep up the good work

 

[korix]

Real men doesn't drink light beer. Light beer is for girls, if anyone.
I've never seen anyone drink light beer, other than in America, and I cannot fathom why it's so popular over there.

 

[Jacob]

∞.

 

[Masi_23]

Tak! I'm sure someone can come up with something else, c'mon lads!

Real men doesn't drink light beer. Light beer is for girls, if anyone.
I've never seen anyone drink light beer, other than in America, and I cannot fathom why it's so popular over there.

No one is telling you to drink light beer. To each to his own.

 

[NFSCARBON1]

I hate those guy's online. They're all a load of stupid punts.

 

[sniper338]

We salute you Mr. Backwards driver,
While the rest of us are racing hard for the win
And you show how you're different by driving the wrong way.
Like a stray cow from the herd you come at us on the radar
Only to make us swear and beg the host to kick you out.
But you will find another room to complete your sunday drives
And annoy the fun out of other people.
So today we salute you mr. Backwards driver.

 

[Vitzio]

We salute you Mr. Backwards driver,
While the rest of us are racing hard for the win
And you show how you're different by driving the wrong way.
Like a stray cow from the herd you come at us on the radar
Only to make us swear and beg the host to kick you out.
But you will find another room to complete your sunday drives
And annoy the fun out of other people.
So today we salute you mr. Backwards driver.

Oh God, those people. Always ruining NASCAR races for me.

 

[BryCivicSi]

Those commercials were great and yours is too. Can you make an audio version? That'd be icing on the cake.

 

[BlazeTheCat05]

Oh my god...so freaking funny.

Here's one I thought was cool.

(Real Men Of Genius!)
Today we salute you, Mr. I can't drive without assists!
(Mr. I can't drive without assists!)
Your complete lack of driving skills leads you to use driving assists....even on dirt.
(I just wanna have an ad-van-tage!)
And did I mention? You still seem to spin out more than legit drivers who are man enough to unleash their car's full potential.
(Grow a pair, or you ain't goin nowhere!)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, and let everyone know....you can't drive without assists!
(I can't drive withouts assists, yeah yeah yeah!)

I wasn't trying to offend anyone.

 

[mvpers]

Oh my god...so freaking funny.

Here's one I thought was cool.

(Real Men Of Genius!)
Today we salute you, Mr. I can't drive without assists!
(Mr. I can't drive without assists!)
Your complete lack of driving assists leads you to use driving assists....even on dirt.
(I just wanna have an ad-van-tage!)
And did I mention? You still seem to spin out more than legit drivers who are man enough to unleash their car's full potential.
(Grow a pair, or you ain't goin nowhere!)
So crack open an ice cold Bud Light, and let everyone know....you can't drive without assists!
(I can't drive withouts assists, yeah yeah yeah!)

I wasn't trying to offend anyone.

perfect

 

[Slash]

I always got a kick out of these commercials.

 

[graybeard]

Korix - the fact that so many of my countrymen drink light beer is indeed an embarassment, all that I can say is it's cheap and caters to the lowest common denominator of beer drinker (think NASCAR, as an example), but on the bright side, it helps fund the making of great Superbowl commercials (football, another silly American game) so I guess it serves a purpose of sorts. Guess not everyone can be a Guinness Extra Stout-drinking soccer nut like me!

 

[RockinVs]

(Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you - Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.
( Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.)
Nothing gets you more in the zone than having your dog barking constantly at your kids who are fighting over the last pizza roll.
(You should really lock them in the closet)
As everyone else is trying to listen for their gear changes, they cannot help but hear your girlfriend talking extremely loudly about her feminine problems.
(She should probably get that thing checked out)
As the laps roll on, it becomes obvious that you must be deaf from all that nagging, since you do not hear the constant complaints from the other drivers.
(Are you in an airport?)
So get that girl to get you an ice cold Bud Light, Ace Driver...
Because maybe, for just a second, she will be quiet while she goes into the other room.
(Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.)

 

[TSracing]

Ah..! Love that one!
So true.. 👍

 

[sniper338]

RockinV that is freakin hilarious!

 

[kk20]

(Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you - Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.
( Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.)
Nothing gets you more in the zone than having your dog barking constantly at your kids who are fighting over the last pizza roll.
(You should really lock them in the closet)
As everyone else is trying to listen for their gear changes, they cannot help but hear your girlfriend talking extremely loudly about her feminine problems.
(She should probably get that thing checked out)
As the laps roll on, it becomes obvious that you must be deaf from all that nagging, since you do not hear the constant complaints from the other drivers.
(Are you in an airport?)
So get that girl to get you an ice cold Bud Light, Ace Driver...
Because maybe, for just a second, she will be quiet while she goes into the other room.
(Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.)

 

[BlazeTheCat05]

RockinVs, perfect. I deal with these guys almost EVERY time I go into a lounge.

 

[RockinVs]

Thanks guys.

I've had some inspiration for that as well quite often.

 

[VspecZR1GT2RS89]

(Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you - Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.
( Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.)
Nothing gets you more in the zone than having your dog barking constantly at your kids who are fighting over the last pizza roll.
(You should really lock them in the closet)
As everyone else is trying to listen for their gear changes, they cannot help but hear your girlfriend talking extremely loudly about her feminine problems.
(She should probably get that thing checked out)
As the laps roll on, it becomes obvious that you must be deaf from all that nagging, since you do not hear the constant complaints from the other drivers.
(Are you in an airport?)
So get that girl to get you an ice cold Bud Light, Ace Driver...
Because maybe, for just a second, she will be quiet while she goes into the other room.
(Mr. Driver with the hot microphone.)

Three words........ I Love It!!!!! :tup: 👍

And to the OP who created this thread...

 

[RockinVs]

Ooooh, I've got another one.

(Real Men of Genius)
Today we salute you - Mr. Time Trial Cheater Guy.
(Mr. Time Trial Cheater Guy.)
You enjoy winning. Who doesn't? But who says the fastest driver has to win? You blaze your own trail to victory!
(It sure is pretty under the race track)
Your gold chrome race car shines in the sun, at least until you ram into the wall.
(I'm sure that will buff out)
As you barrel through, and start posting some 17 second laps, it doesn't even cross your mind that now all Polyphony Digital is going to do is work on an update to stop people like you.
(Hopefully they will at least put up another Tsukuba seasonal)
So take another swig off your ice cold Bud Light, Awesome Driver Dude.
Your superior driving skills will soon be the envy of everyone.
(Mr. Time Trial Cheater Guy.)