GTP Cool Wall: Mercedes-Benz SL73 AMG

[niky]

The numbers don't really matter. This car is too big, too heavy, and too "conspicuous consumption". It's got a naturally aspirated V12, which is more engine than any single person needs to hit warp speed (it would be a fair bit faster if it were smaller and had less mass resting over the front axle). And it's a convertible, of all things... so it's doubly heavy and half as stiff.

But as flawed as it is... it's simply mental. I agree with this:

Sub-Zero.

This is the way you build a hammer.

Sub-zero.

 

[Famine]

Would anyone who put uncool or lower care to explain why they made that choice?

Sure.

It's a range-topper - which means it's visually indistinguishable from a base model. Since there's more base models, most people who see it will think "It's a Mercedes SL... whatever". Apart from the badges - and who's ever seen a base model car badged up as a range-topper? Or AMG badges stuck all over a Mercedes with no AMG parts on it?

It's the sleeper argument all over again - I just don't think sleepers are cool to ordinary people (non-car buffs), because in order for them to know it's not an uncool base model you have to tell them that it's actually a nuclear-powered version, which then destroys the facade of sleeperness. And it can't be cool if it needs explaining - cool is mysterious.


So you have a fat, thirsty, upbadged 80s wedge that you have to explain what's good about it.

 

[FLASH48]

Not my type of car. Black Series!

 

[JCE]

So you have a fat, thirsty, upbadged 80s wedge that you have to explain what's good about it.

Eh, not so much in my opinion. The noise alone would explain it.

Plus, if you own it you cannot tell me you don't FEEL cool while driving it. If I FEEL cool driving something I AM cool in my own eyes. That's what matters, what I think. What do I care if some old 60-something person or some young 19-something person doesn't know what I've got? I know what I have, that's what matters.

Also, this idea that cars aren't cool because they are the range toppers and look too similar to the base models is rubbish in my opinion. There are way too many cool (or colder) cars that are being disqualified because it is the range topper and therefore just have subtle hints of what's going on. This leaves only single one off models with no trim levels cool--boring. So using this logic, a Lamborghini Gallardo, Ferrari 599 and Pagani Zonda are uncool. They have both "base" models and "extra performance" trim level models. The Black Series Mercs aren't cool either, they are just another trim level. This also leaves out the; EVO, STI, Aston Martin DB9, Bugatti Veyron, anything with a BMW badge, anything with an Audi badge, anything with a Porsche badge and you can see my point already.

My $0.02.

 

[Famine]

Eh, not so much in my opinion. The noise alone would explain it.

I hear plenty of loud cars every day. They're usually driven by teenagers, cripple-hooking. Loud does not beget cool.

Plus, if you own it you cannot tell me you don't FEEL cool while driving it. If I FEEL cool driving something I AM cool in my own eyes. That's what matters, what I think. What do I care if some old 60-something person or some young 19-something person doesn't know what I've got? I know what I have, that's what matters.

I'm sure when a train-spotter catches sight of the 47821 it feels cool.

Also, this idea that cars aren't cool because they are the range toppers and look too similar to the base models is rubbish in my opinion. There are way too many cool (or colder) cars that are being disqualified because it is the range topper and therefore just have subtle hints of what's going on. This leaves only single one off models with no trim levels cool--boring. So using this logic, a Lamborghini Gallardo, Ferrari 599 and Pagani Zonda are uncool. They have both "base" models and "extra performance" trim level models. The Black Series Mercs aren't cool either, they are just another trim level. This also leaves out the; EVO, STI, Aston Martin DB9, Bugatti Veyron, anything with a BMW badge, anything with an Audi badge, anything with a Porsche badge and you can see my point already.

Not seeing the problem here. Except in the case of the DB9, which only has coupe and convertible variants. And that you've fundamentally misunderstood the concept - it doesn't leave single, one-off models at all. It merely covers range toppers which are not visually distinct from lower specs unless you're an automotive trainspotter.

The Gallardo, 599, Zonda and Veyron are uncool anyway, by dint of being supercars. Evo and STi cars are uncool anyway, by dint of being vulgar chav chariots.

My $0.02.

2c won't even buy you an AMG badge to stick on your SL320.

As I said, it's the sleeper argument all over again. And since I was asked, it's an explanation of why I voted seriously uncool, not why you should.

 

[niky]

I've actually always thought the silly side vents were a giveaway.

And what's so sleeperish (asking all in general, on both sides of the fence) about a fifteen foot long phallus?

 

[TheCracker]

1) It's a Merc SL
2) It's a 'sports car' that weighs 2 tonnes
3) It's no faster than a SL55
4) It will be owned solely by men who wear deck shoes and jeans with shirt's tucked in.
5) It looks like every 3rd owner 280SL on the road now.
6) It's seriously uncool

 

[Famine]

I've actually always thought the silly side vents were a giveaway.

They all have silly side vents. You'd need trainspotter-esque note of detail to distinguish them though.

And what's so sleeperish (asking all in general, on both sides of the fence) about a fifteen foot long phallus?

It's a very fast fifteen foot long phallus. Many of the other models in the range that look identical to the untrainspotter eye are much slower fifteen foot long phalluses.

 

[Stotty]

Voting this Merc SL sub-zero just because it's got 7.3l V12 is like voting an ugly, fat girl the hottest thing on the planet just because she has a 50" chest.

This model is Meh at best... a 6 cyl version might just qualify as cheap(ish) quality motoring and scrape in to cool.

I'm beginning to think most of the posters on here would vote a Kia Rio sub zero.

 

[NLxAROSA]

IMO, any car that needs any explaining why it's cool is not. I think TheCracker and Stotty sum it up quite nicely.

You can put a candle on a turd and say it's a lovely piece of pie, but it's still a turd.

 

[Paulie]

Does it come in a hard top?

 

[Clark]

Seriously uncool. An overweight, uncessary and vulgar Mercedes. No Mercedes after 1960 is cool.

Thank heavens the engine found a good home.

 

[Rykon Zero]

I was under the impression being vulgar was the key when designing this thing.

 

[Duke]

I voted "Meh". It should be cool but it has a few things going against it:

1) It's a Mercedes.

2) Only 517hp from 7.3 litres? If this was an American car, people would be complaining endlessly about what crappy underachieving engineering that is.

3) It's a Mercedes.

 

[Northstar]

Uncool, there isn't much visually differentiating it from a normal uncool Mercedes, making the AMG version also uncool.

Oh, and what Duke said.

 

[Lucas]

Would anyone who put uncool or lower care to explain why they made that choice?

Sure.

I voted Seriously Uncool because all I can see is a big Mercedes-Benz (not exactly what I would call a cool brand), and while I don't know the power figures of it, I sure have an idea how many kg must that thing weight.

 

[Tornado]

While I take no issue with the rest of the post:

3) It's no faster than a SL55

So? A V6 Toyota Camry can outrun almost every performance car made before 1975.

and while I don't know the power figures of it, I sure have an idea how many kg must that thing weight.

I would hope you would know those things when they've both been stated in this thread.

 

[Lucas]

I would hope you would know those things when they've both been stated in this thread.

I judge cars in these threads the way I would judge them if I saw them on the road: with the current knowledge I have at the moment of judging. As I have said in another thread (IIRC), I don't carry a computer with me everywhere I go to see if that Fiat that just passed by has 100 or 300HP.

EDIT: It seems that this thing weights 300kg more than I expected. Wow...

 

[The Vanishing Boy]

COOL-> This was one the last of the Big-Body (aka. true/real) Mercedes era. It is also my favorite SL Class/Series, such an unadultered brute with that 7.3L (which is now home into a Pagani's engine compartment) under its sedate hood.

-> Sure, it's a turd. But this was a cruiser car for pete's sake! If you want performance, then get a Pagani! Simple as that! Rarity counts too!

 

[Bram Turismo]

But this was a cruiser car

You don't need an engine the size of a building to cruise, though.

I give it a "meh".

 

[red70mach1]

I like sleepers just as much tricked out & personalized street machines out on the roads. In other words it is no diiferent than a exteriorally (if there is such a word) downgraded WRX-STi.

 

[niky]

It's a very fast fifteen foot long phallus. Many of the other models in the range that look identical to the untrainspotter eye are much slower fifteen foot long phalluses.

Ah. Never did like trains. That must explain it.

I'm beginning to think most of the posters on here would vote a Kia Rio sub zero.

What's wrong with a Kia Rio?

 

[McLaren]

I'm beginning to think most of the posters on here would vote a Kia Rio sub zero.

And so what if they did?

 

[Famine]

exteriorally (if there is such a word)

No, there isn't. Or there wasn't. There is now

[/Person filmed and broadcast on the internet using the 'word' "customisability"]

 

[TheCracker]

So? A V6 Toyota Camry can outrun almost every performance car made before 1975.

You're talking about very different cars from very different eras. I'm talking about the same car from pretty much the same era (or even from the exact same era if you include the equally rare R129 SL55)

 

[Azure Flare]

Somebody at Mercedes-Benz 💡, lets put a 7.3L V12 in the SL.

Me, . Sub-Zero

 

[Blitz187]

I voted sub-zero just because it's so vulgar with that 7.3L V12... I like! 👍

 

[Vince_Fiero]

Not fully convinced, so got stuck at Cool.

Never liked these pimp cars.

 

[Tornado]

I'm talking about the same car from pretty much the same era

You really aren't, but that distinction doesn't change anything about my original point regardless. A range-topping 2004 C5 Corvette ZR1 is pretty much slower across the board then the base 2005 C6 is. Same thing. Cars today are faster than cars from the previous decade. That shouldn't be particularly surprising.
The SL73 originally debuted in 1995. The SL55 debuted 7 years later. It stands to reason that the 7-year newer car with slightly less power and slightly less weight will produce similar performance numbers.

(or even from the exact same era if you include the equally rare R129 SL55)

Doubtful, considering it was down by 170 HP.

 

[Giancarlo]

Friggen' badass.