Things not to say during sex

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United States
Indiana
ViperManiac
Things not to say during sex:

-Boy everybody looks funny naked.

-You woke me up for that?

-Oh did I mention the video camera?

-Oh hell baby, a little rug burn never hurt anybody.

-Sweetheart, did you lock the back door back there? (in a car)

-Could you pass me the remote control?

-Do you accept VISA?

-On second thought......... lets turn off the lights.

-And to think I was really trying to pick up your friend.

-Gee I hope you as good lookin when I'm sober.

-Uhmmm...... do you get any of the premium movie channels?

-Try not to smear my makeup, will ya?

-Smile you're on Candid Camera!

-I thought you had the keys to the handcuffs.

-I want a baby.

-I think you got it on backwards.

-Uhmm... when is it supposed to feel good?

-Wow baby, you're good enough to do this for a living.

-Oh, did I remember to take my pill?

-Are you sure I don't know you from somewhere?

-Boy I wish we got the Playboy channel.

-I tell you one thing, that leak better be from the waterbed.

-No really, I do this part better myself.

-Did I tell my Aunt Martha died in this bed?

-Is that you or is your mattress stuffed with rotten potatoes?

-It sure is nice to being bed with a woman I don't have to inflate.

-Wow you're almost as good as my ex.

-What tampon?

-Have you ever considered liposucksion?

-Uh.... now you ain't gonna tell no one is ya?

-Did I mention my transexual operation?

-I really hate women who actually think sex means something.

-Oh hell, a good plastic surgeon take care of that in no time.

-I'm gonna need another beer for this.

-So uhm.... when would you like to meet my parents?

-Have you seen Fatal Attraction?

-Oh don't mind me, I always file my nails in bed.

-Oh hey sorry about the name tags. I just not real good with names.

-Would you keep it down? Daddy's a light sleeper.

-Ya know, my old girlfriend could do it for alot longer.

-You mean you're not my blind date?

-How long to plan to be.............almost there??
 
...you know you've got that sister, well...

Of course the Lord Jesus Christ has a story about sex...

Hi I'm Patrick Bateman VP...

:D
 
hahahah!!

Theres also:

Get away from me!

God your ugly...

Why are we together again?

You're a guy arent you

You call that a rack?

... hehe..
 
Hahaha... man thats funny

How do you come up with these things??

-- ack! sorry for the double post!!
 
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