- 87
- TwinTurboJosh
Just kidding, I love you guys. But here's an epic write-up.
Saturday I grinded enough cash and then spent the 2.5 hours waiting for the FormulaGT to appear in the Used Car Dealership so I could buy it. Score. I start up the championship series and give the first race a whirl. The AI was so incredibly fast and aggressive that I hate to immediately quit and collect my thoughts. If I was to go to the effort to do 6 of these harrowing 20 lap races against AI such as this, the prize better damn well be worth it (aside from finishing up Extreme). I started to think "eh, you probably unlock the Redbull Special Event at a certain level, just like the other special events." Then along came that Google spreadsheet prize list. Someone was pretty damn certain you flat-out won the X1 (even though they say Redbull F1) for completing the FormulaGT series. That settled it; I needed to man up and accomplish this task.
So today I grind out another million credits thinking that it'd be a good idea to 'refresh' the FormulaGT's engine and chassis as they have about 5,000 miles on them. Done. I'm packing 935HP, 44HP more than the competition. I had already changed the oil.
Race 1: Fuji - It went pretty much exactly as how I imagined it would from my 1 lap sample on Saturday. Throughout the entire 20 laps, the AI cars appeared as a blue worm comprised of triangles slithering across the mini-map. They never broke from one another. All keeping the same blistering pace as the next. I don't watch a whole lot of F1, but one thing I do know is that it's not bumper to bumper for the duration of the race. Regardless, I was able to make it to the front of the pack within a few laps and hold the lead, despite feeling the breath of my nemesis, O. Horne, the entire time. I will be referring to O. Horne as a 'she' from here forward as in 7th grade I had a grammar teacher called Mrs. Horne, and she was a bitch, so 'nuff said.
Race 2: Indy Road Course - This is a little more like it. Out front by the end of the first lap. I kept a pretty solid 1.5-2.5s lead the entire time. Take that, Mrs. Horne!!!!!!!!!!
Race 3: Cote d' Azur or "It hits the fan in Monaco" - A terrible race. The cars are immediately bunched together, and a huge wreck before the second turn puts me in the back of the pack. I persevere and managed to continue to gain positions. One thing I notice is that the AI cars are literally overheating their tires entering every turn. Despite this 4-tire fire, they are still capable of maintaining a 4G turn and accelerate out of it stronger than a crackhead. But I digress. I make it up to 3rd place on the 6th lap, but Mrs. Horne and her flunkie are waaaaaaaaay out in front since they avoided that early pileup. So being a 12-year vet of the series I do like any other good GT player when desperate to beat the computer - I cheat. You know that long straightaway after the first turn that leads to that large left-hand sweeper that leads down to the casino? Using a little trick I learned from Initial D, I rode the gutter along the outside of the turn at full speed. Of course when I say "gutter," I mean "wall." Ten laps of this and I'm getting close. Then on the 19th lap, I make my move while braking after the tunnel, and make it back to first despite the fact it feels like my heart is about to explode. Oh yes, this is Gran Turismo.
Race 4: Nurburgring F1 - This race was a kick in the ass. Apparently the turns on this course are extremely bumpy (my first time driving it with the FormulaGT), yet while I have to slow down to make them without hopping off course, the AI is able to dive in underneath me and stick the corners like glue despite the fact their tires are producing mroe smoke than a Cheech & Chong film festival. I bought the chassis reinforcement upgrade (the only one available for this car), and apparently it was a bad idea as it seemed to hurt me on this course. Either that or I needed to tune the suspension. Either way, I was able to bounce around in the top couple of positions for the first couple of laps until I realize something magical: If you are within 2-4 seconds of the car in front of you on the penultimate turn on this track (left-right chicane at a tire wall), there is a 100% chance that they will spin out exiting this turn. They will go wide into the grass, and spin every single time. Let that soak in for a minute. If they're behind you, the odds drop a bit. Unfortunately, the AI FormulaGT cars recover from a spin supernaturally fast. At this point I realize that while I can easily win this race due to this fact, I get a little devious. Time for your comeuppance Mrs. Horne! No more taking 2nd position anymore! If you're not first, you're gonna be last! So yeah, I let her get into first place in front of my on about the 12th lap, and sure enough, a little pressure from me from behind and she goes off...... way down the list and out of the points. Unfortunately the AI cars in the middle of the pack continued to be boneheaded as expected on that turn, and Mrs. Horne manages 6th place while I take first for the 5th time in a row.
Race 5: Monza (w/ weather?) - I hate you, Kaz. I really do. Thank you for taking away the ability to practice and qualify for races before each one. Trying a race out blind is great! I also love starting in the middle of the pack while Mrs. Horne starts at pole. I'm at 400 points, while she's at 240. I can put this series on ice. Anyways, on the pre-race setup screen the sky is gray as can be. I can't tell if it's wet or not because the stupid camera is only showing parts of the track where no cars are driving. Right about now would be a good time for that practice lap feature. Having literally nothing to go on aside from this gray ass sky, I figure "it's gonna rain." Why wouldn't it? Now makes a perfect time for them to spring this on me at this point in the game. I ask my pit manager to look-up the forecast for me, but his lips are sealed. Intermediate tires it is!!!!! Which turn out to be a colossal mistake by the fact that 3 seconds after the green flag, I'm in last place. Clearly the other drivers knew it wasn't going to rain. It's almost like they have some insider knowledge of what's going on inside my PS3. After 5 laps, this is getting ugly. The pack is almost 30 seconds ahead when I decide to pit for the hell of it and change out my tires to racing softs. By the time I'm back on the track, I'm 55 seconds behind the leader, but I give it my all! I'm driving like a bat out of hell and taking every single one of the delicious shortcuts Monza provides. I'm cutting 3-4 seconds off Mrs. Horne's pace each lap, but will it be enough? By lap 15, the rear groups of cars are within my grasp (really? Now of all times the cars don't stick together like a centipede?). I manage to knock off a pair or two of cars each lap. By the final lap, I'm right there! But the 2nd place racer finally grows a pair, and he takes the lead spot from Mrs. Horne. After I pass her mid-lap, I allow this white knight to taste the thrill of victory, cuz what do I care? I'm racing against Mrs. Horne, and Mrs. Horne only!
It never did rain a drop that entire race.
Race 6: Suzuka - Kiss my ass, Suzuka. I don't need your stinking points, this series is over. Quit.
And then comes the moment I was waiting for. Come to me my precious Redbull monster. Come to your master! Congratulations, you won a Caterham Fireblade....
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FFfffffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
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Congratulations for completing the Extreme Series! Here's your Level 21 prize car. Wait? Level 21? Not Level 24 like the last race in the Series? Not a Ferrari F1 car?! A standard Lister Storm race car?
So that's where I stand now. The intensity of this championship race has literally taken 10 years off my life, and I have a couple of crappy cars to show for it. I mean yeah, Caterhams are one of my most favorite cars in real life, but I already have one in the game!!! At least I got enough XP earned to take on the Level 28 Endurance Race :/
Sorry for the ran, but this championship was horrible. Aside from the horrid prizes, the entire thing took waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much effort just to get into. And then it goes and highlights how many steps back they've taken in regards to pre-race prep. It also showcased some absolutely terrible AI that up until now I've had zero complaints about. There's no way something like this could have passed QA with a straight face.
Anyways, I'm willing to share the FormulaGT car for all you sick sadists out there that still want to go for this thing. Go ahead and add me (PSN: TwinTurboJosh), but all Friend Requests must be in the form of a Haiku. Serious. God Speed.
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