- 3,620
- Slovenia
- csiApok
I decided to start my own story.
Because I like doing things that probably don't benefit me in any way.
Comentator: With only a lap to go the Opel Speedster has the lead, despite the driver's questionable driving technique.
''Ha! This is easy. Those guys don't stand a chance.''
Comentator: Yes young Drake Hunter has a thing to learn about racing if you ask me. Those lines are terrible!
''Easy as pie!''
''Oh 🤬''
''Woo. The finish line is right around the corner!''
-1 corner later-
Comentator: Well the race is over and the Opel won just like last time.Good thing nobody watches this race or people would be pissed.... Is this thing on?
-------------------------------------------------------------
And so ended another race. My name is Drake and I win races because I don't have a choice (I'm not particularly good at anything else). It'd be nice if I could compete in the better races, but the cars the other racers have are too good. So until I get another car this is what I'm doing. So excuse me I need to go annoy the other racers.
I walk up to three people talking next to a Renault Megane.
''So you lost again, eh? I was hoping you would improve over the last two weeks.''
''Oh not you again. You know that the only reason you actually ever win is because you have a better car, right?''
I shake my head disaprovingly and feel a sudden need to prove them wrong, but I remember that reruns of Family guy are being shown on TV, so I just call them soore loosers and move on.
I slowly head to my car looking at the people talking and going about their business, when I notice a rather big man standing in front of my car. He looks like he stepped straight out of a gangster movie. He has dark hair, sunglasses and a jacket. God knows why since it's a warm sunny day. I continue walking towards the car, curious of what he wants, when I hear him talk. He has a deep and comanding voice.
''Hey you! You the driver of this car?''
''Yeah, uhh... what do you want?'' I mumble in a confused manner.
''We need to talk to you about your racing here. It seems you've been racing here for the last 4 times we held this race.''
''Yes I have. Is there a problem?''
''Is there a problem? Yeah. We want you to stop coming here with an overpowered car!''
This comes as a shock to me, so I answer back rather irritated.
''What? Where does it say that overpowered cars aren't allowed to compete?''
''It doesn't and quite frankly I don't care. You either accept this and come back with a slower car, or you don't accept this and we don't let you enter? It's not the other racers fault you can't drive.''
Now this gets me mad. I want to punch the guy in the face, but I take a second look at him and decide not to. I just open my car door and make sure I stare at him in the eyes like that would hurt him somehow.
I get home and I feel like I want to destroy something, like that would somehow help, but after a long think at the table with some chips I calm down and decide I'm going to buy a new car tomorrow. I can't continue like this. Things are bad already.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Beep, beep, beep!
Oh another Monday morning. I'm unemployed and it's still not a particularly nice day. I get up and make myself some coffee and a sandwich. I start up my laptop which is low on battery as always and open a site with ads of used cars for sale. I take a big bite out of the sandwich and wait for the site to open.
I take a glance at some Toyota's, Mitsubishi's and even a Mercedes. The car that catches my eye is a Nissan Silvia S13. It's not too far and only costs around $7000. I eat the sandwich and drink the coffee. I call the owner and he says I can come right over and we'll negotiate a deal. I run out the door wisely forgetting to lock the front door like usual. I call up a cab and it drives me to the house. There's a silvia in front of the house, but that's probably not the car I'm here for. The door is opened by a small girl who looks at me like I'm some sort of monster or something. In my mind I'm putting on a huge mask and saying ooga, booga, booga, but I decide that the real world is not ready for the things I think of in my mind.
''Uhh... is your father home?''
The little girl runs off and a man in his 40's comes to the door. He's in a tank top and holding a can of beer.
''Yeah? Whaddya want''
''Hi. My name is Drake Hunter. We talked on the phone about the...''
''Oh yeah, about the car. She's right there''
Sadly he points to the direction of the car I spotted earlier.
''You said that the color is cranberry red. That car looks kind of... pink''
The owner looks irritated, like he remembered years of friends mocking him for driving a pink car.
''Listen I don't have time for this. Do you wanna buy the car or not?''
I wait for a moment to think. Do I want a pink car that I haven't driven before whose owner looks like he hasn't showered in a week?
''Yeah, sure''
I pay the man and he hands me the keys.
Over the course of the next two weeks I had a mechanic change the oil (Which apparently looked like someone blended pizza and put bits of chewing gum in it* it didn't smell like pizza though -weird, right?) and got used to the way the car drives. It's really not a bad car. I found something, that looks like a 2 inch furry caterpillar in it... and it probably is a 2 inch furry caterpillar, but all the non-organic bits in the car seem to work. It is however quite slower than the opel and well I expected that. I just hope I do well on the race which conveniently starts right now.
I park my car and walk to the sign up booth. There I notice a friend from two weeks back.
''I told you and your opel to scram!''
''I didn't bring an Opel. I have a new car. Take that!''
I point in the direction of my new silvia proudly and expect the gangster man to apologize or something.
''Why is it pink?''
''It's not pink, It's cranberry red!''
''Yeah, whatever you say.''
Gangster man takes a piece of paper and writes something on it. I suspect he wrote pink in the colour box.
I walk away from the booth and prepare to race. I'm quite confident about this. I'll win.
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Commentator: And today we have a nice lineup of cars. One of the drivers is Drake Hunter from the last race, but not in his Opel! He brought a pink Nissan Silvia s13 this time. Maybe we'll see what he's really made of.
Oh great my first day of racing with this car and already at least 3 people think it's pink.
Gangster man, the commentator and me.
The race starts and I am in last place. Like usual. Right... all I have to do is drive this car.
And drive it fast.
Commentator: Drake Hunter already passes the Fiat, but we'll see what happens later.
Alright so far so good, but I can't pass anything else. What's wrong?
Commentator: As I suspected Drake Hunter still needs some practice. On the other hand the Miata up front is showing off some stable driving also the...
Not again! After 5 races I still can't remember to brake here. I blame it on the oil spill in the gulf of Mexico.
-fast forward to the end of the race-
Commentator: And the race is over with the blue Miata driven by A. Iron in first place, the...
...and Drake Hunter finishes in last place after braking too late in the last corner. Point and laugh everyone!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
After the race I hurry home. I probably went over the speed limit. Well that is if this car can go that fast. The radio is broken, so there isn't a problem of anything interrupting my thoughts anyway.
What now? I only have around $4000 left.
I could get a job at McDonalds.
Although I hate the smell of that place. I do believe that the antichrist will be the result of a filet o' fish gone wrong...
Eh you know what. I always risk everything anyway and although it all went terribly bad I need to do this!
I will learn how to race!
Preferably starting with the next chapter.
----------------------------------------
*It IS a reference to YARS what with the nasty oil and such.
Comments appreciated 👍
And yes I know. The title is absolutely terrible
Because I like doing things that probably don't benefit me in any way.
Chapter 1: So... I suck?
Comentator: With only a lap to go the Opel Speedster has the lead, despite the driver's questionable driving technique.
''Ha! This is easy. Those guys don't stand a chance.''
Comentator: Yes young Drake Hunter has a thing to learn about racing if you ask me. Those lines are terrible!
''Easy as pie!''
''Oh 🤬''
''Woo. The finish line is right around the corner!''
-1 corner later-
Comentator: Well the race is over and the Opel won just like last time.Good thing nobody watches this race or people would be pissed.... Is this thing on?
-------------------------------------------------------------
And so ended another race. My name is Drake and I win races because I don't have a choice (I'm not particularly good at anything else). It'd be nice if I could compete in the better races, but the cars the other racers have are too good. So until I get another car this is what I'm doing. So excuse me I need to go annoy the other racers.
I walk up to three people talking next to a Renault Megane.
''So you lost again, eh? I was hoping you would improve over the last two weeks.''
''Oh not you again. You know that the only reason you actually ever win is because you have a better car, right?''
I shake my head disaprovingly and feel a sudden need to prove them wrong, but I remember that reruns of Family guy are being shown on TV, so I just call them soore loosers and move on.
I slowly head to my car looking at the people talking and going about their business, when I notice a rather big man standing in front of my car. He looks like he stepped straight out of a gangster movie. He has dark hair, sunglasses and a jacket. God knows why since it's a warm sunny day. I continue walking towards the car, curious of what he wants, when I hear him talk. He has a deep and comanding voice.
''Hey you! You the driver of this car?''
''Yeah, uhh... what do you want?'' I mumble in a confused manner.
''We need to talk to you about your racing here. It seems you've been racing here for the last 4 times we held this race.''
''Yes I have. Is there a problem?''
''Is there a problem? Yeah. We want you to stop coming here with an overpowered car!''
This comes as a shock to me, so I answer back rather irritated.
''What? Where does it say that overpowered cars aren't allowed to compete?''
''It doesn't and quite frankly I don't care. You either accept this and come back with a slower car, or you don't accept this and we don't let you enter? It's not the other racers fault you can't drive.''
Now this gets me mad. I want to punch the guy in the face, but I take a second look at him and decide not to. I just open my car door and make sure I stare at him in the eyes like that would hurt him somehow.
I get home and I feel like I want to destroy something, like that would somehow help, but after a long think at the table with some chips I calm down and decide I'm going to buy a new car tomorrow. I can't continue like this. Things are bad already.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Beep, beep, beep!
Oh another Monday morning. I'm unemployed and it's still not a particularly nice day. I get up and make myself some coffee and a sandwich. I start up my laptop which is low on battery as always and open a site with ads of used cars for sale. I take a big bite out of the sandwich and wait for the site to open.
I take a glance at some Toyota's, Mitsubishi's and even a Mercedes. The car that catches my eye is a Nissan Silvia S13. It's not too far and only costs around $7000. I eat the sandwich and drink the coffee. I call the owner and he says I can come right over and we'll negotiate a deal. I run out the door wisely forgetting to lock the front door like usual. I call up a cab and it drives me to the house. There's a silvia in front of the house, but that's probably not the car I'm here for. The door is opened by a small girl who looks at me like I'm some sort of monster or something. In my mind I'm putting on a huge mask and saying ooga, booga, booga, but I decide that the real world is not ready for the things I think of in my mind.
''Uhh... is your father home?''
The little girl runs off and a man in his 40's comes to the door. He's in a tank top and holding a can of beer.
''Yeah? Whaddya want''
''Hi. My name is Drake Hunter. We talked on the phone about the...''
''Oh yeah, about the car. She's right there''
Sadly he points to the direction of the car I spotted earlier.
''You said that the color is cranberry red. That car looks kind of... pink''
The owner looks irritated, like he remembered years of friends mocking him for driving a pink car.
''Listen I don't have time for this. Do you wanna buy the car or not?''
I wait for a moment to think. Do I want a pink car that I haven't driven before whose owner looks like he hasn't showered in a week?
''Yeah, sure''
I pay the man and he hands me the keys.
Over the course of the next two weeks I had a mechanic change the oil (Which apparently looked like someone blended pizza and put bits of chewing gum in it* it didn't smell like pizza though -weird, right?) and got used to the way the car drives. It's really not a bad car. I found something, that looks like a 2 inch furry caterpillar in it... and it probably is a 2 inch furry caterpillar, but all the non-organic bits in the car seem to work. It is however quite slower than the opel and well I expected that. I just hope I do well on the race which conveniently starts right now.
I park my car and walk to the sign up booth. There I notice a friend from two weeks back.
''I told you and your opel to scram!''
''I didn't bring an Opel. I have a new car. Take that!''
I point in the direction of my new silvia proudly and expect the gangster man to apologize or something.
''Why is it pink?''
''It's not pink, It's cranberry red!''
''Yeah, whatever you say.''
Gangster man takes a piece of paper and writes something on it. I suspect he wrote pink in the colour box.
I walk away from the booth and prepare to race. I'm quite confident about this. I'll win.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Commentator: And today we have a nice lineup of cars. One of the drivers is Drake Hunter from the last race, but not in his Opel! He brought a pink Nissan Silvia s13 this time. Maybe we'll see what he's really made of.
Oh great my first day of racing with this car and already at least 3 people think it's pink.
Gangster man, the commentator and me.
The race starts and I am in last place. Like usual. Right... all I have to do is drive this car.
And drive it fast.
Commentator: Drake Hunter already passes the Fiat, but we'll see what happens later.
Alright so far so good, but I can't pass anything else. What's wrong?
Commentator: As I suspected Drake Hunter still needs some practice. On the other hand the Miata up front is showing off some stable driving also the...
Not again! After 5 races I still can't remember to brake here. I blame it on the oil spill in the gulf of Mexico.
-fast forward to the end of the race-
Commentator: And the race is over with the blue Miata driven by A. Iron in first place, the...
...and Drake Hunter finishes in last place after braking too late in the last corner. Point and laugh everyone!
----------------------------------------------------------------------
After the race I hurry home. I probably went over the speed limit. Well that is if this car can go that fast. The radio is broken, so there isn't a problem of anything interrupting my thoughts anyway.
What now? I only have around $4000 left.
I could get a job at McDonalds.
Although I hate the smell of that place. I do believe that the antichrist will be the result of a filet o' fish gone wrong...
Eh you know what. I always risk everything anyway and although it all went terribly bad I need to do this!
I will learn how to race!
Preferably starting with the next chapter.
----------------------------------------
*It IS a reference to YARS what with the nasty oil and such.
Comments appreciated 👍
And yes I know. The title is absolutely terrible
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