GR.3 Saturday
- Thread starter TexasJDC
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- 6,634
- Columbus, Ohio
- nog3861
This is Ben Dover interrupting this thread for some breaking news coming out of the ARL headquarters in Podunk, Indiana. Let’s go to our man on the scene, Hugh Jass for the latest. Hugh:
Thanks Ben. WFUK has learned of some devasting news coming from the BOD regarding one of their drivers being in violation of an unwritten rule, buried deep inside the ARL rules and regulations.
Apparently Death Wish Coffee Racing Team driver nog3861 is being accused of, and I quote, “ZIPPO CLICKING” during the closing laps of last week’s race.
It was very difficult to hear what was being said, as the John Cougar Mellancamp music was blaring in HQ, but I have been able to piece together the following:
In the closing laps of Race 2, as nog3861 was closing in on the driver in front of him, His right rear tire went off track, which caused the car to spin, resulting in the driver losing many positions to those behind him. While nog3861 was aimlessly spinning and doing 360’s, the ARL BOD claims to have video and in car audio of excessive “ZIPPO CLICKING”, rather than trying to get the car under control. The driver could also be heard mumbling something about cornbread….not sure if he was hungry or just looking forward to the post-race meal. Because of this alleged “ZIPPO CLICKING” the ARL BOD has decided to serve nog3861 with a two-week suspension, starting with this weekend’s race at Tsukaba in Japan. I was able to catch up to nog3861 as he was leaving the BOD offices and he had this to say:
Hugh: Nog, what in the wide wide world of sports is going on here? A two-week suspension?
Nog: Well, Hugh, I am devastated to say the least. I must first start off by apologizing to my excellent team mate, @Jw_wk1010 . This suspension could not have come at a worse time, with this weekend’s race and more importantly, missing out on next week’s double point wildcard race.
Hugh: Tough indeed nog, tough indeed. Do you care to comment on this alleged “ZIPPO CLICKING”?
Nog: Well Hugh, I have been asked not to comment any further by my attorneys, from the prestigious law offices of Dewey, Cheetum and Howe, so I will just say no comment. I will say this though; I drive in a couple of other leagues, and they have no problem or issue with my “ZIPPO CLICKING”, SO I GUESS I AM AT A LOSS.
Hugh: I can respect that. Do you have any plans during this two-week hiatus? You won’t be racing, so what will you do?
Nog: Plans, plans, let me tell you about plans. Apparently those farging bastages that make up the ARL BOD seem to think I need “driver reconditioning”. So with that, they are sending me to their European Driver Reconditioning Camp in Warsaw Poland. Poland! Poland! Who the hell wants to go to Poland!
Hugh: My goodness Nog, that is something else. When will you be leaving the country?
Nog: Ha, the BOD has me all set to go. They have booked my flight and made arrangements at the “Camp”. My flight takes off tomorrow at 3:00pm Eastern. I am “expected” to check into the driver recondition camp upon my arrival. On the bright side however, they were kind enough to pay for my wife, Mrs nog3861, to accompany me. So, there is some silver lining I reckon. Once “camp” has ended for the day, The Mrs and I plan to hit the Warsaw, Krakow and Gdansk Bar Scene, heavily.
Hugh: Well, I wish you the best during your time being “reconditioned” Nog and look forward to your return to the track in 2 weeks.
This is Hugh Jass reporting. We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.
Thanks Ben. WFUK has learned of some devasting news coming from the BOD regarding one of their drivers being in violation of an unwritten rule, buried deep inside the ARL rules and regulations.
Apparently Death Wish Coffee Racing Team driver nog3861 is being accused of, and I quote, “ZIPPO CLICKING” during the closing laps of last week’s race.
It was very difficult to hear what was being said, as the John Cougar Mellancamp music was blaring in HQ, but I have been able to piece together the following:
In the closing laps of Race 2, as nog3861 was closing in on the driver in front of him, His right rear tire went off track, which caused the car to spin, resulting in the driver losing many positions to those behind him. While nog3861 was aimlessly spinning and doing 360’s, the ARL BOD claims to have video and in car audio of excessive “ZIPPO CLICKING”, rather than trying to get the car under control. The driver could also be heard mumbling something about cornbread….not sure if he was hungry or just looking forward to the post-race meal. Because of this alleged “ZIPPO CLICKING” the ARL BOD has decided to serve nog3861 with a two-week suspension, starting with this weekend’s race at Tsukaba in Japan. I was able to catch up to nog3861 as he was leaving the BOD offices and he had this to say:
Hugh: Nog, what in the wide wide world of sports is going on here? A two-week suspension?
Nog: Well, Hugh, I am devastated to say the least. I must first start off by apologizing to my excellent team mate, @Jw_wk1010 . This suspension could not have come at a worse time, with this weekend’s race and more importantly, missing out on next week’s double point wildcard race.
Hugh: Tough indeed nog, tough indeed. Do you care to comment on this alleged “ZIPPO CLICKING”?
Nog: Well Hugh, I have been asked not to comment any further by my attorneys, from the prestigious law offices of Dewey, Cheetum and Howe, so I will just say no comment. I will say this though; I drive in a couple of other leagues, and they have no problem or issue with my “ZIPPO CLICKING”, SO I GUESS I AM AT A LOSS.
Hugh: I can respect that. Do you have any plans during this two-week hiatus? You won’t be racing, so what will you do?
Nog: Plans, plans, let me tell you about plans. Apparently those farging bastages that make up the ARL BOD seem to think I need “driver reconditioning”. So with that, they are sending me to their European Driver Reconditioning Camp in Warsaw Poland. Poland! Poland! Who the hell wants to go to Poland!
Hugh: My goodness Nog, that is something else. When will you be leaving the country?
Nog: Ha, the BOD has me all set to go. They have booked my flight and made arrangements at the “Camp”. My flight takes off tomorrow at 3:00pm Eastern. I am “expected” to check into the driver recondition camp upon my arrival. On the bright side however, they were kind enough to pay for my wife, Mrs nog3861, to accompany me. So, there is some silver lining I reckon. Once “camp” has ended for the day, The Mrs and I plan to hit the Warsaw, Krakow and Gdansk Bar Scene, heavily.
Hugh: Well, I wish you the best during your time being “reconditioned” Nog and look forward to your return to the track in 2 weeks.
This is Hugh Jass reporting. We now return you to your regularly scheduled thread.
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- 1,275
- USA
- 929
- Louisville
Just take it on the chin man. You'll come out a better person on the other side. At least it's not rehab for tranquilizers and laxatives. That is a hell hole from what I hear
- 929
- Louisville
- 4,480
- Gardner, KS
Stay tuned. The Tuesday night endurance series is about to benefit ARL racers
- 6,207
- Dallas,TX
- ARL_TexasJDC
A bunch of us run it on sundays most of the guys who run ARL Saturdays race SNAIL sundays feel free to ask away and we will help as much as possible
- 929
- Louisville
- 929
- Louisville
- 82
- Georgia
I also would like to run in snail to! More time behind the wheel for me the better!
- 950
- United States
Yeah I want to as well I’m gonna look into the Sunday night races for sure I’m in for the super formula race as well that start tomorrow night
- 6,207
- Dallas,TX
- ARL_TexasJDC
Cool guys if yall have any questions shoot me a message and I'll help out any way I can
- 4,480
- Gardner, KS
@Turdburgerlar @Jacob Falcon
Be sure to go over to the snail section and get “officially” signed up. It’s a little bit of a process if you wait too long you will miss this weekends races.
Be sure to go over to the snail section and get “officially” signed up. It’s a little bit of a process if you wait too long you will miss this weekends races.
- 6,207
- Dallas,TX
- ARL_TexasJDC
@Turdburgerlar and TyGuy-97 I have you guys signed up to run as a team what's going to be the team name?
- 3,233
- Lebanon PA
- Herimopp89
Turd guy tyburgerler
- 82
- Georgia
- 82
- Georgia
I have a lobby open if anyone would like to join.
Room ID: 0475-4235-5847-0577-0564
Room ID: 0475-4235-5847-0577-0564
- 6,634
- Columbus, Ohio
- nog3861
- 1,275
- USA
Welcome new guy
- 4,480
- Gardner, KS
@Nick Cannella @TexasJDC @Herimopp89 @Jw_wk1010 as promised here is Action Figue Therapy.
Jack, show the guys at work.
Jack, show the guys at work.
- 929
- Louisville
- 6,634
- Columbus, Ohio
- nog3861
- 929
- Louisville
Hey guys I wanted to ask u snail members a question, but I forgot what I was gonna say
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