SimBin Studios to Hold First Women-Only Esports Competition

[Famine]

That sounds way more dramatic then it is, one of the problems here is that said female user opened the messages and actually looked at their content, giving the user some credibility.

They were left directly on her public profile page. And she deleted them and reported them without ever responding to them.

Regardless of that, it's the fact they were sent in the first place that's the problem (that some here are saying doesn't really exist), not whether she read them or not.


And that's here on GTPlanet. A sensible place with sensible rules and sensible people, not Facebook or Youtube, or some idiot screaming down his mic in an online game.

 

[warp9engage]

They were left directly on her public profile page. And she deleted them and reported them without ever responding to them.

Regardless of that, it's the fact they were sent in the first place that's the problem (that some here are saying doesn't really exist), not whether she read them or not.


And that's here on GTPlanet. A sensible place with sensible rules and sensible people, not Facebook or Youtube, or some idiot screaming down his mic in an online game.

There will always be bad apples, even in the nicest of communities. Unfortunately, there are those who feel that anonymity gives them the chance to behave poorly and in ways they never would in person, because they don't feel threatened by enough consequences. I prefer to continue being myself, even with anonymity, but for others it brings the worse of them out, sadly.

 

[Michael88]

They were left directly on her public profile page. And she deleted them and reported them without ever responding to them.

Regardless of that, it's the fact they were sent in the first place that's the problem (that some here are saying doesn't really exist), not whether she read them or not.

Of course, but one has to step back a little and realize the scope of it all, it all boils down to - some random person I do not know at all sent me some text thats not nice. Annoying yes but in the grand scheme of things in life (and even online) one of the absolutely tiniest and most harmless annoyances you can possibly encounter, and something that really should not cause any harm to the average healthy person.
People inflating this minor annoyance to huge magnitudes and making it a serious problem is what makes this a serious problem.

Should we strive to combat abusive behavior in communities? Absolutely, and we are already doing that very efficiently, no need to go overboard with it, which brings me back to the main point of this topic.

Instead of making a ''Womens only'' racing event people should encourage both genders to work together more, separation and seclusion is not the way to deal with interpersonal ( Intergenderal? 💡 ) problems, in fact events like this will probably cause even more problems down the road.

 

[C-ZETA]

Still, at least we're not all getting carried away with this.

 

[Eva]

Of course, but one has to step back a little and realize the scope of it all, it all boils down to - some random person I do not know at all sent me some text thats not nice. Annoying yes but in the grand scheme of things in life (and even online) one of the absolutely tiniest and most harmless annoyances you can possibly encounter, and something that really should not cause any harm to the average healthy person.
People inflating this minor annoyance to huge magnitudes and making it a serious problem is what makes this a serious problem.

Should we strive to combat abusive behavior in communities? Absolutely, and we are already doing that very efficiently, no need to go overboard with it, which brings me back to the main point of this topic.

Instead of making a ''Womens only'' racing event people should encourage both genders to work together more, separation and seclusion is not the way to deal with interpersonal ( Intergenderal? 💡 ) problems, in fact events like this will probably cause even more problems down the road.

To clarify, that person was me. I never responded to his posts on my profile, or his attempts at private conversations.

Of course, but one has to step back a little and realize the scope of it all, it all boils down to - some random person I do not know at all sent me some text thats not nice. Annoying yes but in the grand scheme of things in life (and even online) one of the absolutely tiniest and most harmless annoyances you can possibly encounter, and something that really should not cause any harm to the average healthy person.
People inflating this minor annoyance to huge magnitudes and making it a serious problem is what makes this a serious problem.

Should we strive to combat abusive behavior in communities? Absolutely, and we are already doing that very efficiently, no need to go overboard with it, which brings me back to the main point of this topic.

Instead of making a ''Womens only'' racing event people should encourage both genders to work together more, separation and seclusion is not the way to deal with interpersonal ( Intergenderal? 💡 ) problems, in fact events like this will probably cause even more problems down the road.

That sounds way more dramatic then it is, one of the problems here is that said female user opened the messages and actually looked at their content, giving the user some credibility. If I know user XYZ has a problem with me I ignore him or her completely until he or she runs out of steam. I have been in a similar situation, in a forum where some user decided to harass me nonstop with crazy private messages. After the first abusive message I simply erased them on the spot. The few asinine comments in threads I ignored too until the mods deleted them. That was not hard.
This never even turned into a problem in the first place.

Not always, but oftentimes victims of online harassments seem to do everything to escalate this slight annoyance and turn it into a problem.

To clarify, that person being trolled was me. I was sent private conversation attempts as well as the posts on my profile, yet I never responded to him once.

Now, on the topic of women's only racing, I think if done right, it can bolster the amount of women in the world of motorsport through the gaming community, and could be very successful. Obviously in real life it isn't the most feasible, but in gaming where it's easier to access, it'd be worth research and experimenting. While I don't have the PC to compete in SimBin's activities, I will be keeping my eyes on it.

 

[Brend]

Still, at least we're not all getting carried away with this.

That seems like a bit of an exaggeration.

 

[Famine]

To clarify, that person being trolled was me. I was sent private conversation attempts as well as the posts on my profile, yet I never responded to him once.

And to be honest I never could find any connection between you and the original focal point of his fury, which was Team Redline. I have no idea why he was targeting you, other than your gender...

 

[Scaff]

Of course, but one has to step back a little and realize the scope of it all, it all boils down to - some random person I do not know at all sent me some text thats not nice. Annoying yes but in the grand scheme of things in life (and even online) one of the absolutely tiniest and most harmless annoyances you can possibly encounter, and something that really should not cause any harm to the average healthy person.
People inflating this minor annoyance to huge magnitudes and making it a serious problem is what makes this a serious problem.

Should we strive to combat abusive behavior in communities? Absolutely, and we are already doing that very efficiently, no need to go overboard with it, which brings me back to the main point of this topic.

Instead of making a ''Womens only'' racing event people should encourage both genders to work together more, separation and seclusion is not the way to deal with interpersonal ( Intergenderal? 💡 ) problems, in fact events like this will probably cause even more problems down the road.

From a numbers perspective that doesn't work.

If you have a 5% take up of women currently then statistics dictate that representation is always going to be low in terms of profile, regardless of the individuals ability, the chances of seeing a women in the top 100 of any given event or completion is significantly lower, and as a result women will see it as something that doesn't reflect them (at the very last its discouraging).

Holding women only events ensure that the group in question is fully represented (which is a given for males in a mixed event, as they have 95% coverage), which is only going to encourage more women to partake, and once numbers are closer to parity then mixed gender events become credable.

Its no different than having racing series organised by nation, age or ability.

 

[Eva]

And to be honest I never could find any connection between you and the original focal point of his fury, which was Team Redline. I have no idea why he was targeting you, other than your gender...

Having been on PSN for years, I've realized that reasoning is a myth with some people. So who knows. It's sorted, which is all that matters now. 👍

 

[Johnnypenso]

I've always enjoyed reading hilarious examples of boorish male behaviour from @WhoosierGirl. Perhaps she'll join us and give us her perspective

 

[Eva]

Having fully read the article, I can get behind what they're doing and why. It's an alternate way of thinking, and if no one has tried it before, no one can say it'll definitely fail. Hopefully it gets a decent amount of participation.

 

[Dhalism]

Female presence in any male-dominated arena will always draw ire from the scum. Especially anonymous scum.

So do any men of note. Hell i've been doxed by someone in F1 twitch chat, granted i dont exactly hide who i am, but its still weird to be called out by your real name by a stranger. You know theyre trying to get a rise out of you. Hennogarvie, famous host of an illegal F1 stream was doxxed and reported to the authorities. Any Trumpsc, Lirik, Kripp or whoever receive a ton of abuse without even blinking. And when i was a teenager, either because i chose to be amongst other teenagers, or because majority of the internet were teenagers, every other person wanted to either have relationship with my mother or for me to get cancer. It's ridiculous that when it is woman who receives that kind of treatment its suddenly a big deal.

Positioning women as victims IS sexist.

The reason women aren't into "sim racing", and most realistic simulation games in general, is because they're smart enough to realize doing something imaginary is stupid when you can just do the real thing if you want to do it that badly. I can guarantee 99% of women who want to race and have the means race in real life. The rest have more productive ways to spend their time.

Competition isnt imaginary. Besides 99% of anyone dont have means to race in real life. It is really expensive.

Couldn't agree more. The older I get the more difficult it is to enjoy not doing something 'productive', although I'm not sure what that really says about me. I can't sit very long at GT or any game before I feel silly and think there really is something better I should be doing. At some point the games became a distraction, I just had too much to get done every day. Maybe women arrive at that mentality far earlier in life than men do. I don't think this was necessarily the case until the last couple generations of males, at least here in the USA.

I have a theory as to why, but that's a rabbit hole.

Unproductive things include partaking in sports, watching sports, watching tv, reading books, and so on and so forth. But those are things that matter to people, to our society. Obsessing over productivity and inability to relax cant be healthy either.

And that's here on GTPlanet. A sensible place with sensible rules and sensible people, not Facebook or Youtube, or some idiot screaming down his mic in an online game.

Facebook, youtube or randoms in voice chat? You might as well say that women get treated poorly in crack dens. Who in their right mind willingly enters conversation in either of those 3?

 

[Famine]

Facebook, youtube or randoms in voice chat? You might as well say that women get treated poorly in crack dens. Who in their right mind willingly enters conversation in either of those 3?

Last I checked, women use Facebook. And Youtube. And play games online. I mean, the ones in this house do at any rate. They don't have to initiate a conversation with anyone to be on the receiving end of abuse. Nor does anyone - I've played a lot of MW/MW2 online and been abused without provocation.

However, that rather misses the point that I was saying GTPlanet is a nice place compared to other parts of the internet (like Facebook, Youtube, or online games), and apparently trolls still hurl obscene sexual abuse at women here. Yet people are denying that it happens at all...

 

[Fredzy]

So do any men of note. Hell i've been doxed by someone in F1 twitch chat, granted i dont exactly hide who i am, but its still weird to be called out by your real name by a stranger. You know theyre trying to get a rise out of you. Hennogarvie, famous host of an illegal F1 stream was doxxed and reported to the authorities. Any Trumpsc, Lirik, Kripp or whoever receive a ton of abuse without even blinking. And when i was a teenager, either because i chose to be amongst other teenagers, or because majority of the internet were teenagers, every other person wanted to either have relationship with my mother or for me to get cancer. It's ridiculous that when it is woman who receives that kind of treatment its suddenly a big deal.

Positioning women as victims IS sexist.

Nobody is trying to tell you that your being harassed was OK, or any less bad because you're a guy. Your being harassed is just as ****** as Jane Doe's being harassed. The fact is that women tend to be harassed (or otherwise treated in some special way which makes them feel uncomfortable) just because they're women, whether they're notable or not. Nobody is obligated to do anything with that fact, just take it as FYI.

To your point though, harassment and abuse online has become so ubiquitous that one could say we're approaching a point of equality between sexes there 👍

 

[TenEightyOne]

Women aren't prominent in sim racing because it's just not much interest in general from not only women but everyone really.

Granted it's not an interest for everyone but why are women forming such a small part of the demographic?

Very few women are interested in car technology, in motorsport and in hardcore motorsport competitions.

Source? In your own opinion is that a natural disposition, something that comes from society, or something else?

Here's a science video I found which is true because it's on YouTube

it's nice not to be smothered in a room full of testosterone on a Friday/Saturday night

Oh you haven't lived

 

[lancia delta hf]

The reason women aren't into "sim racing", and most realistic simulation games in general, is because they're smart enough to realize doing something imaginary is stupid when you can just do the real thing if you want to do it that badly. I can guarantee 99% of women who want to race and have the means race in real life. The rest have more productive ways to spend their time.

BRB, going to Spa tonight to thrash my Holy trinity around then straight off to the ring after that to thrash Nikki Lauda's Ferrai 312 around. And when I'm done with that, in an act of defiance against smart people I might just fire up my PS4 and play a bit of Dirt Rally. If I haven't killed myself in Lauda's Ferrari though.

 

[WhoosierGirl]

I've always enjoyed reading hilarious examples of boorish male behaviour from @WhoosierGirl. Perhaps she'll join us and give us her perspective

I could publish a book with all the interesting messages I've recieved over the last five years, could be a pop up book if I include the pictures

I'm on the fence about the female only event, I like the idea of trying to getting more of us involved but, I also see no need to be separated as I don't think we are at any disadvantage in Sim-Racing so we shouldn't need our own series. We are at a number of players disadvantage but, that's the all, the ability to race fast is about talent and practice, you either put the time in to polish that talent or you don't.

My thoughts on why female gamers don't turn to sim-racing, we enjoy the social side of gaming and we are general not accepted and made to feel welcome by a large amount of Sim-Racers. We are far more accepted here on GTP and a few other sites but, just like @Eva I have dealt with the "WTF brought that on" moments that only have one obvious origin here. Online for every public display of ignorance it is tenfold behind the scenes in messsages, and that is more than most women want to deal with for a genre that takes so much time and effort to get good enough to truly enjoy.

I'm not complaining just adding some insight, I have made some wonderful friends here and online and the experiences are not all bad, I'm also to stubborn to be ran off

 

[Hollow]

I think one of the main issue is how much attention is given to the fact that a certain player is female, whether it's good or bad. What the attention does is make them feel like they actually don't belong, all of a sudden they are hit with opinions from everyone. It's like showing up to a funeral in a clown outfit, it will get you attention, opinions and judgement. Females are made to focus on the fact that they are female instead of them focusing on the game or their skill. There's also a lot more pressure since people think whenever a female plays, she's representing her gender, instead of just representing herself.

This type of female only event will make women not feel like outsiders or outcasts of the sim-racing world. They'd be competing without focusing on the fact that they are females. I don't think women require an event of their own since they aren't at any disadvantage compared to men playing sim-racers, but the reason I mentioned is very important, at least to me. I've also noticed many people tend to try and figure out/question why that female is into sim-racing rather than just accepting the obvious fact that maybe she is into cars and Motorsports. They always think it's more to it than just love of racing or gaming.

It's already rare to find a person who's into Sim-racing, therefore I'm not surprised there aren't lots of females. Aside from sim-racing, I also enjoy games like Street Fighter, and I noticed in their community (the FGC), their competitions rarely have women in them. They have a lack of players in general, then some women sprinkled on top in the community. This issue probably isn't all due to harassment but rather just very few people are that committed to a game to the point where they compete in tournaments or events. Real life commitments and responsibilities force a lot of people to be casual gamers instead of taking it as a proper sport (esport).

Do females face harassment? Yes, majority of the games I play online, I tend to sign up as male just to avoid the attention/harassment that I would get in a lobby if I specify that I'm female. Most of the time it's nothing like harassment, but just the attention from men, I don't want to deal with it, I just want to play the game in peace. I've been fortunate enough to find some very level headed/skilled people playing the GT series, I don't think everyone's that lucky though.

There are certainly more points to cover on this topic.

 

[Dhalism]

Last I checked, women use Facebook. And Youtube. And play games online. I mean, the ones in this house do at any rate. They don't have to initiate a conversation with anyone to be on the receiving end of abuse. Nor does anyone - I've played a lot of MW/MW2 online and been abused without provocation.

However, that rather misses the point that I was saying GTPlanet is a nice place compared to other parts of the internet (like Facebook, Youtube, or online games), and apparently trolls still hurl obscene sexual abuse at women here. Yet people are denying that it happens at all...

Fair enough. I think youtube is a weak example but i am nitpicking. GTPlanet is definitely in the top tier moderation wise.

Nobody is trying to tell you that your being harassed was OK, or any less bad because you're a guy. Your being harassed is just as ****** as Jane Doe's being harassed. The fact is that women tend to be harassed (or otherwise treated in some special way which makes them feel uncomfortable) just because they're women, whether they're notable or not. Nobody is obligated to do anything with that fact, just take it as FYI.

To your point though, harassment and abuse online has become so ubiquitous that one could say we're approaching a point of equality between sexes there 👍

Sure in an ideal world noone will be harassed online but that is never gonna happen. So women need to just ignore it like we've all been doing for the past 2 decades. p.s. holy moly thats not actually an exaggeration. ;;;

To your point though, harassment and abuse online has become so ubiquitous that one could say we're approaching a point of equality between sexes there 👍

On one hand i feel that the internet matured and there is less random hate, but on the other hand when there is hate there is doxxing, brigading, and even official 'trolls' such CTR and the russian groups, whatever theyre called. So i feel that there is less hate, but its a lot more severe if ure the target.

 

[WhoosierGirl]

So women need to just ignore it like we've all been doing for the past 2 decades. p.s. holy moly thats not actually an exaggeration. ;;;

So we should just shut up and deal with it because your tired of hearing about it.....gotcha 👍

Stupid us for thinking that reading about our experiences might enlighten a few to change their behavior.

 

[Famine]

I'd invite anyone who doesn't think that women get harassed online just for being women to create a new profile (not at GTP, obviously) for a service you commonly use, but give it a clearly female name - take your own PSN ID and put "xX-Miss" before it - and see how long it takes until you get unsolicited messages with requests that are sexually oriented.

 

[Dhalism]

So we should just shut up and deal with it because your tired of hearing about it.....gotcha 👍

Stupid us for thinking that reading about our experiences might enlighten a few to change their behavior.

If you want to share your experiences don't be divisive about it. I wonder what kind of reaction a man-only competition based on the fact that men get harassed online would bring? There are many ways in which there is inequality between men and women, there is no need to add to it.

 

[ImaRobot]

edit: misunderstood.

 

[GTP_Ingram]

I'd invite anyone who doesn't think that women get harassed online just for being women to create a new profile (not at GTP, obviously) for a service you commonly use, but give it a clearly female name - take your own PSN ID and put "xX-Miss" before it - and see how long it takes until you get unsolicited messages with requests that are sexually oriented.

Years ago I used my then-girlfriend's PSN account. As her PSN name had "Sarah" in it, the (many) private messages received were split about 50/50 between pervs and those giving patronising congratulations to the girl who'd just hammered them at a Formula 1 game. She did end up changing her PSN name to something less obvious...

 

[Morgoth_666]

Yes, everybody gets harassed and deals with some bad behavior in online games. But from what I've seen over the years, it really just is not the same for men vs women. As a guy, I can expect that if I join any game online, racing included, there is a pretty good chance that I'll just get to play with other people. Period. And I can even voice chat if I want to. If I get a bum room with a jackass causing trouble for me or just in general I can just go somewhere else, and after at most 2 or 3 attempts I'll usually find something where I can just be one of the anonymous gamers doing our thing.

From SOCOM to Gran Turismo and everywhere else in between, it has been my experience that 9 out of 10 times someone joins a room that is either known or suspected to be female, the entire situation changes. It's not always out-and-out harassment or bullying, but it always ends up with tons of undue attention payed to the woman. I'm pretty sure most of the girls playing don't really want to be constantly flirted with by(or "helped" by) half the guys in every room they join, even if they don't have to deal with the really rude stuff. About the only time things really stay "normal" is if it is a room full of people they already know, or is a really well managed room like I sometimes ran into in GT5(and there is still often one person who just can't contain himself). I've even heard some guys (who don't seem to act boorishly) express that they don't like playing in rooms with women simply because of the way the entire mood of a room changes when they come in.

It's seems to be such a constant thing that is different from what most of us ever really have to deal with, unless you are seen to be a "noob" or a moron or have a voice that annoys people which tends to also result in pretty predictable harassment - usually not of the "nice" variety. Some trolls will just pick a person and harass them constantly, even following them around, but that usually seems pretty rare and random.

From my experience online, if I was female I'm pretty sure I would never let anybody in any game find out about it and I would never use a mic. It takes a really thick skin to put up with that day in and day out. For my part I try to just treat the ladies like everybody else but that just hasn't been what I've seen from other people. It's not everybody, but there's always some. Some girls do seem to seek out the extra attention and perhaps end up making things worse, some also may take more offense to some things than they really should, but I assume most are just trying to play the games they love with the best competition possible. Pretty sure she's not in the room because she wants to be your girlfriend, she definitely doesn't deserve to be just plain attacked, and there's probably even a good chance that she's not just here to impress boys on or offline.

Whether this competition will do anything at all to alleviate any of this is doubtful, but anything that helps encourage more people of any gender to enjoy simracing is okay by me.

 

[PzR Slim]

Some of the replies are truly incredible. Seems to me a few in here are part of the problem.

 

[Katiegan]

I think a women only event would be a great idea to get more women out there involved and interested in the world of sim racing and motorsports. The point of it wouldn't be to prove something to men or segregate anyone, it'll just show that racing can be a girl's thing too. I'm a female mechanic, so I know what it's like to be in a male dominated environment and the things that come with it. Luckily, for the most part, nobody's had a problem with me and most reactions to finding out my profession have been positive. Some older customers at work however don't seem to believe I can do the job or know about what I'm doing. One of our older male customers even pulled my male co-worker to the side and raised his concerns about me changing the clutch and flywheel on his car. I personally just brush comments like that off, but when you're being hounded and told you can't do the thing you love the most constantly, or being harassed with inappropriate messages of a certain explicit nature, I can understand why some girls are simply put off. Not everyone can just 'get over it' when they're being harassed, so the comments in here saying women should just deal with it are pretty absurd. I don't see why we should just 'deal' with ignorant and abusive men, as if that's just to be expected and how we should be treated. I'm all for banter, but I don't think sexual harassment is really banter, is it?

 

[AudiMan2011]

I'm sure that most women out there who do hold an interest in sim racing are more than capable of running with and even beating males. Just because women want to get into racing games and eSports more shouldn't be a cause for discrimination against them just because they're female and they end up beating you in a race.

If this event works and it helps more women into games, then more power to them.

 

[oneloops]

Source? In your own opinion is that a natural disposition, something that comes from society, or something else?

Here's a science video I found which is true because it's on YouTube



Oh you haven't lived

You are right to not believe all you see in Youtube, continue with that

Source ? Genetic programation and my life I've known lot of people (I'm forty yo) even women who like cars, driving, or emulate their fathers since their childhood. I'll give you two simple examples, *they prove nothing but if you want believe in the opposite world good for you* : for example a daughter of rally-driver (I know her very well since 4 years) his father is dead and she wanted (from hers 3 yo) do the same activities he did, she has bought the same motorbike than him, she wanted a sport car for her first one car. His brother has a Sport car garage, And you know what ? She doesn't know how many cylinders her car has, she doesn't know how to brake or accelerate while cornering (she accelerates always before the apex and I told her not to do that hundreds of times). She tested some simulators but she is not interested in any technical aspect of it so she drives 2 laps and she goes off the simulator. Another example, Fernando Alonso's father built a kart for his daughter 5 years older than Fernando, she didn't like it... you know what happened with Fernando...

From around 40 or 50 or 100 women I've talked about this matter NONE of them were sure of how many cylinders their daily car has of if their car has electronic inyection or not or what their tyres good pressure is... Ask your near women for it, ask them for more technical aspects (even in informatic areas) and do the same with men.

In Europe I don't know any law that forbids women to know how many cylinders theirs cars have. Maybe in your country there are 90% of men that doesn't know that and 90% of women that do know

Males and females have differents roles in each species, in some species female are the hunters in others they keep responsabilities and safety of the group. The risk and the emulation of risk are connected to that, stadistics here are that natural evidence of that.

Now, you can deny my source, you can deny genetic programming in animals... or you can prove your good intentioned argument, or ask men and women, make your own tests and educate 1000 girls and boys from 0 years to prove the opposite, I wish you good luck

Every human, female or male, has no limits in their pontentiality, some of them push their genetics instincts, others push against them, others copy what others do, others do the opposite that others do. No excuses, no complaints, you can choose your implication in racing-sims from 0 to 100 is a personal choice. Instead of victimhood, we have to keep our own responsability for what we want to practice or achieve in life.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Now, you can deny my source, you can deny genetic programming in animals

That's irrelevant outside the effects that cause animals to form symbiotic social groups. Are you suggesting that there's a disinterest in cars which is innate in female humans and which is therefore genetic?

or you can prove your good intentioned argument

Patronising tosh, but go on...

or ask men and women

I know lots of women who do know the mechanics of their car far better than me and plenty of men who know it's a particular model and not much more. Neither of our samples is very meaningful.

make your own tests and educate 1000 girls and boys from 0 years to prove the opposite, I wish you good luck

I've educated around 5 times that between the ages of 4 and 16, I needed the luck (so thank you in retrospect) and I saw nothing - nothing - to suggest genetically innate preferences outside social interference.

Every human, female or male, has no limits in their pontentiality

Utterly incorrect although limitations that exist do not do so along gender lines.

some of them push their genetics instincts, others push against them

Which are?

others copy what others do, others do the opposite that others do.

Most people do both, particularly at important developmental stages in the organism. How does that support your argument?

No excuses, no complaints, you can choose your implication in racing-sims from 0 to 100 is a personal choice. Instead of victimhood, we have to keep our own responsability for what we want to practice or achieve in life.

You lost me there.

I'm all for banter, but I don't think sexual harassment is really banter, is it?

Too often it seems that "banter" is just an coverword for rude, alienating conduct that the speaker doesn't see a need to apologise for. Cus bants.