Oh, we're definitely friends discussing something. But Brian has a distinct inability to see the bigger picture - he seems to focus exclusively on what he feels (which is fine in and of itself, if limiting), and assume that's universal (which is not fine at all).
The whole point that I'm so vehement about is that
being permissive lets people choose not to do something if they don't like it. But being prohibitive by definition removes freedoms from everybody.
It's right to let people hurt themselves knowingly
because no human being owns any other. It may be sad, it may disappoint you, it may require you to make changes in your life, but that's as far as it goes. I can ask my wife to do something, I can make a deal with her to do something, I can tell her I'm leaving her if she doesn't do it...
but I cannot force her to do anything she does not want to do. When it comes right down to it, she is her own person and I am mine. We made a marriage contract to cooperate, and if one of us violates that contract it may be nullified, but neither of us owns the other one or has any right to force that person into anything.
Consider the example of a band I like. The lead singer and cowriter was addicted to heroin. He wrote many powerful songs about his addiction, and many powerful songs about other subjects. He clearly defined his own addiction as his choice and his pain as self-chosen (in so many words). He was about a year or two younger than I. In his mid 30s, he died of a heroin overdose after a year or more of being so unstable as to render him useless to the band.
Was this sad? Yes. Was this a waste? Probably. Was this preventable? Yes... BUT. The man was under no obligation to provide me with more great songs. I have no ownership of his life and therefore no right to feel cheated by his untimely (if highly probable) death. He probably violated his contract with his bandmates before his death, but he may well have bought out of the legal part of that. He chose to step away from the community of his band and disappointing as that may be, they also had no right to force him to associate with them even though the potential greatness was there. You may say he was violating those people's rights - and mine, as a fan - but that's simply not true.
No person is under any obligation to live up to any standards but their own, and they are under no obligation to associate with anyone they don't wish to, with the possible exception of their children.
Swift
've never heard of someone going to a church and dying from an overdose. Or a person that was so spiritual they lost control of the car and crashed into someone.
I've heard of people going to church and getting so spiritually overdosed that they're willing to walk into a crowded street market and blow themselves up with dynamite... sounds dangerous to both public and personal health to me.
Note that I'm not picking on religious people - I fully support everybody's Constitutional right to worship as they choose.
But protecting people from themselves is A) not necessary, B) extremely difficult to do without violating their rights, if it's even possible, and C) definitely impossible to do in a way that is fair at all.