Ugliest car in GT3 (by popular request)
- Thread starter Danger Powers
- 937 comments
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- 1,803
- mr_pushrod
I think this is much more like your R5 
- 185
What???? You put mini wheels on your Audi? Whatever floats your boat...
Oh and BTW Welcome to the thread, please abide by the Thread FAQ's and if you have a question why not use the handy Thread search feature????
and no ****ing swearing you ****ing ****ty c*nt c**ksucker from hell, oh that looks like the subtitles from a Jerry Springer show 
- 185
I can't help admiring the lines of that classic 'Benetton' Chevette. When you think of what was drivable at the time, the Avenger or a Maxi or a boy race MK2 Escort..... Although I always thought Bodie's Cap-ri was much more stylish. Come to think of it, didn't Dennis 'I could be so good for you' Waterman, of Sweeney fame, have a lovely Mk2 White Cap-ri in Minder... oh those were the days..... I still have a soft spot for a Ford Cap-ri.
Oh god, I'm p!ssed again, its time for the final insult, a list of cars that I've owned...... please God, forgive me for what I'm about to do (I'm going on my Summer Hols for a week or two so hopefully the flak will die down by then)
First Car :- Ford Cap-ri Mk 1, resprayed in a tasteful Black and Silver Two tone with Black Carbonfibre roof.... a 1300cc of throbbing power....
Second Car :- a cracking example of the MKII Escort, another 1300 I'm afraid, but I later fitted a 1600cc engine through the same diff, better 0-60mph... hahahah....
Third Car :- I got a bit pissed off with the 1600cc thing so we turned that into a rally car, I bought myself an RS2000 instead.. in black, with the net Recaros... talk about fanny magnets and ****ty sticks...
I loved that car, I kept it for a few years before I test drove an Astra MK2 GTE 16V in a local garage - the RS was up for sale the same day, and I picked up the Astra 3 days later (FWD, sigh....)
only mine was the classic 'Polar White'. Caught speeding at 140 mph, the speedo said 141mph it was that accurate (digital a la knight rider style )
Took a break for a year.....
Bah, stuffed the Astra on a farmers hedge at 125 mph, cost me about 4 grand to put it right... so in the meantime, I did the embarrasing motor thing
Austin Princess It was 10 years old and in a ****ty blue, but it got me to work for about a month before the bricks started to fall out of the suspension...
The closest I've ever been to a Trueno... left in front of a neighbours window, then moved
A Renault Fuego, again about a months ownership before the radiator blew up, everyone knows these... I sold it to some stupid sod who was talking about putting a porsche body kit on it! At least I made a hundred quid...
A 1980 Audi 100, I bought this because it had an electric sunroof, not much else to say about that, except Mr. MOT Tester found the suspension cracks that I hadn't, and condemned it
Wahey... GTE back on the road, I loved that car, and so did the RAM raiders who stole it and 'parked' it in the Post Office window 20 miles from where I lived
Got it back and swapped it (Hire Purchase left on it) for a french car with superb handling, a 0-60 of 65 seconds, which could easily transport 2 sheep across a ploughed field...
I had so much fun in that car, I left the 'pram' roof down all the time..... no-one bothered it, the stereo was worth twice the cost of the car and no one bothered..... the start of the 'hairdressers' car thing..
My Gallic love affair only lasted till I found out that no-one else would be seen dead in my car, especially not any birds
So, hairdresser mobile Number 2: the MGB GT, nice to look at, briefly, **** engine and gearbox....
Hairdresser Number 3 : Triumph Spitfire, MK1 with chrome....
mine was white though... about that time I met my wife and a number of embarrasing company cars came along, Cavaliers and Vectras.... The last embarrasing one being the Renault Scenic kiddie carrier I had....
yeah, tell me about it... it was the fatal mistake my ex-wife made... I think we'd still be together if she hadn't wanted it....
Along the way that got missed somehow, A Fiat 127 circa 1980, a Talbot solara argh! An Austin Mini Metro, inherited... A Vauxhall Cavilier MK2 in the classic sage green, inherited about 2 years ago with only 2000 miles on it... someone stole it!! A MGB GT, a Triumph Stag.... A MK2 Jag, Sweeney style... unfinished project in my ex-wifes garage.....
And now of course the ultimate in hairdressers motoring
And anyway the Trueno is far uglier than any of those cars, although the Metro is a close second......
Theres just something about that black vinyl roof, it always conjures a picture in my head, oh yes thats it ... the picture below.......
Oh god, I'm p!ssed again, its time for the final insult, a list of cars that I've owned...... please God, forgive me for what I'm about to do (I'm going on my Summer Hols for a week or two so hopefully the flak will die down by then)
First Car :- Ford Cap-ri Mk 1, resprayed in a tasteful Black and Silver Two tone with Black Carbonfibre roof.... a 1300cc of throbbing power....
Second Car :- a cracking example of the MKII Escort, another 1300 I'm afraid, but I later fitted a 1600cc engine through the same diff, better 0-60mph... hahahah....
Third Car :- I got a bit pissed off with the 1600cc thing so we turned that into a rally car, I bought myself an RS2000 instead.. in black, with the net Recaros... talk about fanny magnets and ****ty sticks...
I loved that car, I kept it for a few years before I test drove an Astra MK2 GTE 16V in a local garage - the RS was up for sale the same day, and I picked up the Astra 3 days later (FWD, sigh....)
only mine was the classic 'Polar White'. Caught speeding at 140 mph, the speedo said 141mph it was that accurate (digital a la knight rider style
)Took a break for a year.....
Bah, stuffed the Astra on a farmers hedge at 125 mph, cost me about 4 grand to put it right... so in the meantime, I did the embarrasing motor thing
Austin Princess
It was 10 years old and in a ****ty blue, but it got me to work for about a month before the bricks started to fall out of the suspension...
A Renault Fuego, again about a months ownership before the radiator blew up, everyone knows these... I sold it to some stupid sod who was talking about putting a porsche body kit on it! At least I made a hundred quid...
A 1980 Audi 100, I bought this because it had an electric sunroof, not much else to say about that, except Mr. MOT Tester found the suspension cracks that I hadn't, and condemned it
Wahey... GTE back on the road, I loved that car, and so did the RAM raiders who stole it and 'parked' it in the Post Office window 20 miles from where I lived
Got it back and swapped it (Hire Purchase left on it) for a french car with superb handling, a 0-60 of 65 seconds, which could easily transport 2 sheep across a ploughed field...
My Gallic love affair only lasted till I found out that no-one else would be seen dead in my car, especially not any birds
So, hairdresser mobile Number 2: the MGB GT, nice to look at, briefly, **** engine and gearbox....
Hairdresser Number 3 : Triumph Spitfire, MK1 with chrome....
Along the way that got missed somehow, A Fiat 127 circa 1980, a Talbot solara argh! An Austin Mini Metro, inherited... A Vauxhall Cavilier MK2 in the classic sage green, inherited about 2 years ago with only 2000 miles on it... someone stole it!! A MGB GT, a Triumph Stag.... A MK2 Jag, Sweeney style... unfinished project in my ex-wifes garage.....
And now of course the ultimate in hairdressers motoring
And anyway the Trueno is far uglier than any of those cars, although the Metro is a close second......
Theres just something about that black vinyl roof, it always conjures a picture in my head, oh yes thats it ... the picture below.......
Attachments
- 306
Ooo Mk.2 Escort,my 1st car.I got a funny and very true story about my beloved rust bucket,so gather round children and i shall begin.
In the early days of the 90's a young teenage football fan was coming home from work on a bus,looking out the window he chanced to see the car of his dreams...a biege Ford Escort Mk.2 with a throbbing 1300cc auto engine.He purchased this car with the dreams of following his also beloved football team up and down the length of our fine country.Scraping up the £800 purchase fee,he rushed to the dealer,test drove it and bought the dream car,not thinking for 1 minute it was spingtime and winter was just around the corner.That year he had many great adventures following his beloved footy team around the country until 1 day fate would intervene and deal him a cruel blow.His mother having seeing her son become mobile decided it'd be the ideal transport to take her and his 2 brothers to see her mother on the south coast some 50 miles away,blissfully unaware of the curse she was about to unleash.
Eagerly the family clamber inside the car and set off for the coast.But lo and behold the 1st incident of the curse strikes and the car refuses to go on and breaks down.The problem is soon fixed and not long after that the family set off but once again the curse strikes and the biege beauty breaks down.
Some time passes,and the family are relying on public transport to get them to Grandma's,whilst all along our beloved escort is transporting our main character to footbal matches all over the country.The earlier incidents are forgotten and once again the call is made,"take me to Gran's" but,this is on a Saturday his team are playing at home.He agree to take them as far as the ground (which is on the south coast anyway),they could catch a train the few miles that made up the rest of the journey and he'd join them after.The journey to Hove was smooth,he watched the match and his family got to see Gran.However,returning to his car he finds that his engine wouldn't start and thus wouldn't be able to get to Gran's.
Many months pass and again he's asked to take them to Gran's.So remembering the previous 3 incidents he's naturally nervous,but reluctantly gives in and takes the family south.Surprisingly the journey is smooth,until the curse strikes for the 4th and last time.They get to within 100 yards of Gran's house and the engine gives up.
That car took me all over the country from the north of England to the south west corner of devon,but never to Gran's.
In the early days of the 90's a young teenage football fan was coming home from work on a bus,looking out the window he chanced to see the car of his dreams...a biege Ford Escort Mk.2 with a throbbing 1300cc auto engine.He purchased this car with the dreams of following his also beloved football team up and down the length of our fine country.Scraping up the £800 purchase fee,he rushed to the dealer,test drove it and bought the dream car,not thinking for 1 minute it was spingtime and winter was just around the corner.That year he had many great adventures following his beloved footy team around the country until 1 day fate would intervene and deal him a cruel blow.His mother having seeing her son become mobile decided it'd be the ideal transport to take her and his 2 brothers to see her mother on the south coast some 50 miles away,blissfully unaware of the curse she was about to unleash.
Eagerly the family clamber inside the car and set off for the coast.But lo and behold the 1st incident of the curse strikes and the car refuses to go on and breaks down.The problem is soon fixed and not long after that the family set off but once again the curse strikes and the biege beauty breaks down.
Some time passes,and the family are relying on public transport to get them to Grandma's,whilst all along our beloved escort is transporting our main character to footbal matches all over the country.The earlier incidents are forgotten and once again the call is made,"take me to Gran's" but,this is on a Saturday his team are playing at home.He agree to take them as far as the ground (which is on the south coast anyway),they could catch a train the few miles that made up the rest of the journey and he'd join them after.The journey to Hove was smooth,he watched the match and his family got to see Gran.However,returning to his car he finds that his engine wouldn't start and thus wouldn't be able to get to Gran's.
Many months pass and again he's asked to take them to Gran's.So remembering the previous 3 incidents he's naturally nervous,but reluctantly gives in and takes the family south.Surprisingly the journey is smooth,until the curse strikes for the 4th and last time.They get to within 100 yards of Gran's house and the engine gives up.
That car took me all over the country from the north of England to the south west corner of devon,but never to Gran's.
- 1,803
- mr_pushrod
My uncle had a Mk2 Escort Estate, for about a week. Then someone stole it and rolled it over. Probably did him a favour though
- 19,013
- Jersey V.1.0
- axletramp
I wrote a MK2 Escort estate off by ramming it at over 70mph in my Renault 5 (1986, right at the end of City Way, Rochester. A bit of local flavour there 
) - that ****ing hurt. Two broken ribs and a seat belt burn across my body that lasted months. I couldn't help myself, it was just so ugly - I'd do it again tomorrow!
I'll see if I can dig out some pics to scan of some of my ex-motor's (in a DP-style potted history - watch out!!) Can't believe the coward ran off after posting that. I mean, is that really his back garden? There's a green Hillman Imp in the distance!!! And you notice how quickly he skims past the Talbot Solara - was that the one with the 2.2 unit the size of a bus engine!
Oh yeah... MK2 RS2000 followed by a white Astra GTE. Wow!! Please tell me you used to have a tight wet-look perm, Rayban Navigators and wore a gold chain outside your pastel yellow lambs wool Pringle sweater!
mr_p - I was 18 when I had my R5, believe me I would have loved to fit a body kit like that, perhaps with 245 section tyres not the stabilisers that guy's fitted from his kid brothers bike!
) - that ****ing hurt. Two broken ribs and a seat belt burn across my body that lasted months. I couldn't help myself, it was just so ugly - I'd do it again tomorrow! I'll see if I can dig out some pics to scan of some of my ex-motor's (in a DP-style potted history - watch out!!) Can't believe the coward ran off after posting that. I mean, is that really his back garden? There's a green Hillman Imp in the distance!!!
And you notice how quickly he skims past the Talbot Solara - was that the one with the 2.2 unit the size of a bus engine! Oh yeah... MK2 RS2000 followed by a white Astra GTE. Wow!! Please tell me you used to have a tight wet-look perm, Rayban Navigators and wore a gold chain outside your pastel yellow lambs wool Pringle sweater!
mr_p - I was 18 when I had my R5, believe me I would have loved to fit a body kit like that, perhaps with 245 section tyres not the stabilisers that guy's fitted from his kid brothers bike!
- 351
- SevenYearsDead
Originally posted by axletramp
Oh yeah... MK2 RS2000 followed by a white Astra GTE. Wow!! Please tell me you used to have a tight wet-look perm, Rayban Navigators and wore a gold chain outside your pastel yellow lambs wool Pringle sweater!
hahahahahah I'd have come back earlier, but I've only just stopped laughing!!!
- 185
Oh dear Mr Axletramp, you have no taste. You really can't beat the look of the tight footballers perm, only surpassed by the hideousnous of the mullet, still you'll know about that mate as its your hairstyle of choice 
- 351
- SevenYearsDead
how did the "Borrowed-heavily-from-a-Boxster" Mk111 MR2 Roadster (as driven by badgerhead) escape this poll, anyway? It looks like s**t! As does the Mk1 version that looks like a travel iron in GT2....
and from ugly things to pretty things. Hello ladies...
how poor has my day been......?.........
sst: :gnasher: 
:blackeye: 
uch: etc etc etc..............
and from ugly things to pretty things. Hello ladies...
how poor has my day been......?.........
sst: :gnasher: :blackeye: uch: etc etc etc..............
- 185
Ah thats an easy one, with it being a full on hairdressers car, I like it
- 185
See above 
much better in that lovely pineapple yellow though...
much better in that lovely pineapple yellow though...
- 19,013
- Jersey V.1.0
- axletramp
Only because the DP Salon told me they were coming back in, plus you've still got posters of Hoddle and Waddle on your walls!Originally posted by Danger Powers
Oh dear Mr Axletramp, you have no taste. You really can't beat the look of the tight footballers perm, only surpassed by the hideousnous of the mullet, still you'll know about that mate as its your hairstyle of choice
g.money - He has to keep the roof up just after he's had his wash 'n' set for the weekend. Always going for that 'Tubbs' look:
but always coming out like:
mmmm....
- 1,803
- mr_pushrod
Mk1 MR2 ugly? It's the best looking of the three, sort of like a mini Ferrari. The MkII is too round and needs a big wing to look right (not very Ferrari) while the MkIII is just nasty. Could be worse though, could be an MGF.
Talking about hair, I think the next mod that DP will have to do to his car will have to be a copy of the lovely cortina in the latest nescafe ads. A Ford with an afro!
Talking about hair, I think the next mod that DP will have to do to his car will have to be a copy of the lovely cortina in the latest nescafe ads. A Ford with an afro!
- 4,677
The Mk1 MR2 is not so bad.
- 19,013
- Jersey V.1.0
- axletramp
What, as mechanics?Originally posted by g.money
not in a great mood today- checked coolant level last night on the old Autobahnstormer to find a thick gooey skin of oil in the header tankhere come Audi bills... anyone know a good mechanic?
...I believe sheep are very popular in New Zealand...
Doesn't sound too good mate, 'specially if you use it for work. Which model is it? - Oh go on, say a 1985 Audi 200 or, even better, a 100!
- 19,013
- Jersey V.1.0
- axletramp
Good and Bad. Good - it's not looking too serious. Bad - I was looking forward to posting a mid eighties orange (very popluar for some reason) Audi box.Originally posted by g.money
no, it's a '94 Audi 80 TDi SE.(top of the range- same front as the A4) Had someone look at it last night and we reckon it's getting into the coolant via the turbo (as it is water- cooled), so might not be TOO big a problem- fingers crossed...
- 1,803
- mr_pushrod
What, no Carbonfibre bonnet? When you said it was your 'Autobahnstormer' I thought you meant it had an engine not on of Dr Diesel's evil inventions
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