Brexit - The UK leaves the EU

Deal or No Deal?

  • Voted Leave - May's Deal

  • Voted Leave - No Deal

  • Voted Leave - Second Referendum

  • Did not vote/abstained - May's Deal

  • Did not vote/abstained - No Deal

  • Did not vote/abstained - Second Referendum

  • Voted Remain - May's Deal

  • Voted Remain - No Deal

  • Voted Remain - Second Referendum

Results are only viewable after voting.
I'm watching the press conference live and the angle they've chosen looking down the empty aisle makes it feel like I'm waiting for the world's worst wedding to start
 
Ah come on, at least there's no enemy archers disguised as a band.
 
New 50p design announced:
FB_IMG_1542621115148.jpg
 
I don't know whether Labour are going to ride to the rescue of Theresa May are back her deal - ironically, it is far more in line with what Labour want than what half of her own party want, and that might be crucial in getting the deal through parliament. It is an incredibly risky strategy - but it appears that the strategy is 'back my plan or crash the economy'.
 
Found this very funny. Posting with real author named and link to the original page

Gary Bainbridge
LEAVER: I want an omelette.

REMAINER: Right. It’s just we haven’t got any eggs.

LEAVER: Yes, we have. There they are. [HE POINTS AT A CAKE]

REMAINER: They’re in the cake.

LEAVER: Yes, get them out of the cake, please.

REMAINER: But we voted in 1975 to put them into a cake.

LEAVER: Yes, but that cake has got icing on it. Nobody said there was going to be icing on it.

REMAINER: Icing is good.

LEAVER: And there are raisins in it. I don’t like raisins. Nobody mentioned raisins. I demand another vote.

DAVID CAMERON ENTERS.

DAVID CAMERON: OK.

DAVID CAMERON SCARPERS.

LEAVER: Right, where’s my omelette?

REMAINER: I told you, the eggs are in the cake.

LEAVER: Well, get them out.

EU: It’s our cake.

JEREMY CORBYN: Yes, get them out now.

REMAINER: I have absolutely no idea how to get them out. Don’t you know how to get them out?

LEAVER: Yes! You just get them out and then you make an omelette.

REMAINER: But how?! Didn’t you give this any thought?

LEAVER: Saboteur! You’re talking eggs down. We could make omelettes before the eggs went into the cake, so there’s no reason why we can’t make them now.

THERESA MAY: It’s OK, I can do it.

REMAINER: How?

THERESA MAY: There was a vote to remove the eggs from the cake, and so the eggs will be removed from the cake.

REMAINER: Yeah, but…

LEAVER: Hang on, if we take the eggs out of the cake, does that mean we don’t have any cake? I didn’t say I didn’t want the cake, just the bits I don’t like.

EU: It’s our cake.

REMAINER: But you can’t take the eggs out of the cake and then still have a cake.

LEAVER: You can. I saw the latest Bake Off and you can definitely make cakes without eggs in them. It’s just that they’re horrible.

REMAINER: Fine. Take the eggs out. See what happens.

LEAVER: It’s not my responsibility to take the eggs out. Get on with it.

REMAINER: Why should I have to come up with some long-winded incredibly difficult chemical process to extract eggs that have bonded at the molecular level to the cake, while somehow still having the cake?

LEAVER: You lost, get over it.

THERESA MAY: By the way, I’ve started the clock on this.

REMAINER: So I assume you have a plan?

THERESA MAY: Actually, back in a bit. Just having another election.

REMAINER: Jeremy, are you going to sort this out?

JEREMY CORBYN: Yes. No. Maybe.

EU: It’s our cake.

LEAVER: Where’s my omelette? I voted for an omelette.

REMAINER: This is ridiculous. This is never going to work. We should have another vote, or at least stop what we’re doing until we know how to get the eggs out of the cake while keeping the bits of the cake that we all like.

LEAVER/MAY/CORBYN: WE HAD A VOTE. STOP SABOTAGING THE WILL OF THE PEOPLE. EGGSIT MEANS EGGSIT.

REMAINER: Fine, I’m moving to France. The cakes are nicer there.

LEAVER: You can’t. We’ve taken your freedom of movement.
Click to expand...

Source: https://garybainbridge.com/2018/10/10/column-october-11-2018/
 
Hun200kmh
Found this very funny. Posting with real author named and link to the original page



Source: https://garybainbridge.com/2018/10/10/column-october-11-2018/
Click to expand...
Here's my abbreviated version:

Remainer: Here's the cake you asked for.
Leaver: I didn't ask for cake mate, I asked for spotted dick. I had a cake just like that in Italy and France last week and didn't like it.
Remainer: I'm not your mate. My pronoun is zhe. And spotted dick is sexist and misogynist, we'd never carry something with that name.
Leaver: Gee, what does that even mean?
Remainer: Zhe, not gee.
Leaver: Okay, Zoey, where's my spotted dick?
Remainer: *sigh* My boss says we only serve that one kind of cake. Take it or leave it.
Leaver: I like my spotted dick. Let's vote on it.
Remainer: Whatever old man, you haven't got a chance. The world has passed you by.
Leaver: Wanna bet?

The End.
 
UKMikey
Real finger on the pulse stuff there.

Maybe I'm missing something but I'm not sure what Brexit has to do with gender issues.
Click to expand...
I'm not sure what it has to do with spotted dick either. Perhaps, like most satire, it's not literal. Odd that you knew enough not to ask about eggs and omelettes.
 
Johnnypenso
I'm not sure what it has to do with spotted dick either. Perhaps, like most satire, it's not literal. Odd that you knew enough not to ask about eggs and omelettes.
Click to expand...
Satire involves things that have analogues in real life. The gender issues thing seems like needless mischaracterization, none of which was in the blog post you were "interpreting".
 
Johnnypenso
Here's my abbreviated version:

Remainer: Here's the cake you asked for.
Leaver: I didn't ask for cake mate, I asked for spotted dick. I had a cake just like that in Italy and France last week and didn't like it.
Remainer: I'm not your mate. My pronoun is zhe. And spotted dick is sexist and misogynist, we'd never carry something with that name.
Leaver: Gee, what does that even mean?
Remainer: Zhe, not gee.
Leaver: Okay, Zoey, where's my spotted dick?
Remainer: *sigh* My boss says we only serve that one kind of cake. Take it or leave it.
Leaver: I like my spotted dick. Let's vote on it.
Remainer: Whatever old man, you haven't got a chance. The world has passed you by.
Leaver: Wanna bet?

The End.
Click to expand...

I'll call the coast guard, they may be able to retrieve your point from where it landed.
 
UKMikey
Satire involves things that have analogues in real life. The gender issues thing seems like needless mischaracterization, none of which was in the blog post you were "interpreting".
Click to expand...
MatskiMonk
I'll call the coast guard, they may be able to retrieve your point from where it landed.
Click to expand...
Perhaps I should have simplified it with crumpets and tea for you.
 
Johnnypenso
Perhaps I should have simplified it with crumpets and tea for you.
Click to expand...

The food analogy worked reasonably well, although not as well as the original that you could have just quoted. It only really went wrong when tried to make a funny Brexit analogy based on gender and used a spotted dick joke that was out of date when we joined the EU and is positively dead by now :)
 
MatskiMonk
I'll call the coast guard, they may be able to retrieve your point from where it landed.
Click to expand...
Perhaps Elon Musk could lend us a spare space rocket or two.

Johnnypenso
Perhaps I should have simplified it with crumpets and tea for you.
Click to expand...
A successful analogy requires things that are analogous to other things.

The seventies era sounding spotted dick joke was possibly a suitable analogy for how many supporters of Brexit are seen as old and out of touch but including the gender pronouns debate was over egging the pudding somewhat.
 
Last edited:
The 'Political Declaration' has been published this morning.

While not legally binding, it is regarded as a crucial and formal commitment by both sides, and should (hopefully) go some way to persuading all sides in the UK to back the deal. It is a tall order, but there is language and text in there that is clearly intended to appeal to Labour (e.g. on worker's rights etc.) and Hard Brexiteers alike (e.g. on avoiding the Irish backstop from kicking in) etc., but it remains to be seen how convincing this non-legally binding declaration will be.

It also should pave the way for an agreement to be finalised at the emergency EU summit on Sunday, despite threats from various EU member states to vote down the deal. If that happens, then frankly all bets are off - while the UK is deeply divided on the deal, it is becoming increasingly clear that certain major EU members (Spain and France in particular) are pushing for further, major concessions from the UK, despite the fact that this is only likely to deepen UK opposition to the deal.
 
Last edited:
UKMikey
Perhaps Elon Musk could lend us a spare space rocket or two.

A successful analogy requires things that are analagous to other things.

The seventies era sounding spotted dick joke was possibly a suitable analogy for how many supporters of Brexit are seen as old and out of touch but including the gender pronouns debate was over egging the pudding somewhat.
Click to expand...
I see you're at least able to knock on the door. A little more effort and you might be able to make it all the way in.
 
Here's my (short) take on the whole Brexit/cake thing...

UK: We want our cake and to eat it!
EU: That will never happen.

*Two years later*

EU: OK, OK - you can have your cake and eat most of it, but it will cost you...
UK: We don't want it any more.
Spain: Good, we're not going to let you have it anyway.
 

Similar threads

TenEightyOne
Reddit "Include" Question
Replies
1
Views
553
Jordan
Jordan
DK
Brexit and motorsport
Replies
8
Views
1K
mustafur
mustafur
KSaiyu
The EU
2
Replies
49
Views
2K
Hun200kmh
Hun200kmh
Pebb
Honda could be axing its UK car factory in 2022
2
Replies
36
Views
3K
Scaff
Scaff
Jimbo221992
Untitled racing league, Monday night UK time.
Replies
3
Views
2K
Bowtner
Bowtner

Latest Posts

Back