Funny/Strange News Stories

[TenEightyOne]

Anything mocking Russell Brand is golden.

Yup, if he's the revolution then I'm finally pro-establishment.

 

[PeterJB]

Insert eating-out joke here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-29943994

 

[Legro]

http://yle.fi/uutiset/hs_finnish_officials_ban_the_word_whisky_on_private_blog/7523995

Seriously?

 

[TenEightyOne]

Insert eating-out joke here:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-birmingham-29943994

This is a great story. She's got something to prove too;

People said my crisped rice Johnny Depp cake wasn't a proper cake, so I wanted to show them I could make a life-sized sponge cake.

A driven woman, and no surprise. But quite mad.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Everything you need to know about Australian politics:

 

[Famine]

Damn you, autocorrect!

 

[Lizard]

Who read the daily fail's front page this morning?

 

[axletramp]

More bizarre than funny, but the headline made me laugh.

 

[Grayfox]

A roundabout is a threat to the US president

http://www.9news.com.au/national/20...emolished-to-make-way-for-presidents-huge-car

 

[Rage Racer]

 

[Touring Mars]

The New England Patriots came up with a novel idea to celebrate reaching 1 million followers on Twitter - produce a shirt with the username of their 1 millionth follower!!

Unfortunately, their 1 millionth follower goes by the Twitter handle 'IHATEN****RSS'. Even more unfortunately, no-one seemed to notice the racially offensive nature of the person's name, and went ahead and posted a picture of the winning shirt on their Twitter page... It's since been deleted.

http://www.independent.co.uk/sport/...rate-1-million-twitter-followers-9860271.html

 

[Lizard]

Imagine if they played with that shirt.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Did they print it or was it cgi once user[1000000] registered? The "with" picture looks like the same ad picture with the tag superimposed.

Still, this is absolutely my favourite story of this week

 

[ProjectWHaT]

Slightly less proud to be a New Englander.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Om nom nom. Brazilian trio placed an advert for a nanny, then ate her. And sold her in "empanadas" to the neighbours, it's alleged.

 

[BobK]

Om nom nom. Brazilian trio placed an advert for a nanny, then ate her. And sold her in "empanadas" to the neighbours, it's alleged.

Interestingly, the trio was a man, his wife, and his mistress. All of whom lived together.

 

[m8h3r]

Interestingly, the trio was a man, his wife, and his mistress. All of whom lived together.

Living the dream.

 

[dylansan]

How does someone "fixated by killing women" end up with both a wife and mistress?

I guess when those two have the same fixation...

 

[Grayfox]

Abbott how did he ever become PM.
http://www.news.com.au/national/pri...eader-xi-jinping/story-fncynjr2-1227126276231

 

[Rage Racer]

"Big Bad Vlad" burger offered in Australia, Brisbane after the G20 summit.

However, there is a common deception on the the West, "Vlad" is actually short for Vladislav name. The short for Vladimir is "Vova".

 

[TenEightyOne]

"Big Bad Vlad" burger offered in Australia, Brisbane after the G20 summit.

Let me guess, it eats you? (Etc. etc. )

However, there is a common deception on the the West, "Vlad" is actually short for Vladislav name. The short for Vladimir is "Vova".

I didn't know that, my friends horse is called Wladimir (or Wlad for short). I'll try to remember Vova! (But not as Vulva, however tempting).

 

[prisonermonkeys]

However, there is a common deception on the the West, "Vlad" is actually short for Vladislav name. The short for Vladimir is "Vova".

Yes, but then it doesn't rhyme.

Could be worse, though. It could be in Australian English. Then it wouldn't make sense to anyone.

 

[TenEightyOne]

This story's in French, fairly new and so there's no English version available yet.

To summarise; a lady used BlaBlaCar (a carpooling site) to advertise that she was available on certain journeys at certain times. Two men needed that route - they were appearing in a murder trial there (apparently on bail I guess, I don't know the case).

They met the car and got their lift, it wasn't until the journey was underway that they recognised her as an associate magistrate in the trial. Talk turned to the case (whether they'd already recognised her I don't know) and naturally they told their lawyers at the end of the journey. It remains to be seen if the trial will have to restart.

Le link.

 

[TenEightyOne]

A French lady cancelled her landline after losing her job. A final bill was generated and she was unable to pay, the company kindly offered to allow her an installment arrangement.

They've now waived the bill on the grounds that it was accidentally calculated at 6,000 times larger than France's economic output.

 

[m8h3r]

A French lady cancelled her landline after losing her job. A final bill was generated and she was unable to pay, the company kindly offered to allow her an installment arrangement.

They've now waived the bill on the grounds that it was accidentally calculated at 6,000 times larger than France's economic output.

"As I did lose my job I can unfortunately only afford roughly 1 million euros a month, for the next 11 billion years. Thats only cause I have a little savings. "

 

[disinfected]

BREAKING: Winnie the Pooh is a hermaphrodite, exposes himself in public and has no business being around children — at least according to a Polish town council.

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2014/11/21/globalpost-winnie-the-pooh-polish-town/19333551/

 

[FoolKiller]

Dear Polish Town Council,

Read a freaking book every now and then. He is clearly a he and a teddy bear. It is established at the very beginning. And his name is not Winnie. It is Edward.

CHAPTER I

IN WHICH WE ARE INTRODUCED TO WINNIE-THE-POOH AND SOME BEES, AND THE

STORIES BEGIN

HERE is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels that there really is another way, if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it.

And then he feels that perhaps there isn't. Anyhow, here he is at the bottom, and ready to be introduced to you. Winnie-the-Pooh.

When I first heard his name, I said, just as you are going to say, "But I thought he was a boy?"

"So did I," said Christopher Robin.

"Then you can't call him Winnie?"

"I don't."

"But you said--"

"He's Winnie-ther-Pooh. Don't you know what 'ther' means?"

"Ah, yes, now I do," I said quickly; and I hope you do too, because it is all the explanation you are going to get.

And that, my friends, is how you begin a pair of books.

 

[Grayfox]

Why is this woman suing Peppa Pig?

Today in “People Who Should Probably Not Be Allowed Near Courtrooms”, a woman in Italy is suing the kids’ TV show Peppa Pig for a reason that will make you, well, snort. The woman’s name is Gabriella Capra. “Capra” is Italian for ‘goat’ and when the show airs in Italy, the popular “Gabriella Goat” character is called “Gabriella Capra” (which really messes with the whole Peppa Pig alliteration thing … ). The 40-year-old woman says she has been the “object of scorn” amongst peers and acquaintances since the introduction of Gabriella Goat and is demanding 100,000 Euros (A$143,000) in compensation to protect her name.

One episode of the popular show, according to the suit, shows the Pig family being shown around an Italian village by Gabriella Goat, the daughter of the owner of the holiday home and niece of the local pizza maker. Gabriella makes bleating noises. Because, you know, she’s a goat.

Since then, incomprehensibly, the real Gabriella Capra has been taunted, which seems a trifle unfortunate. Whether it’s $A143,000 worth of unfortunate remains to be seen.

The woman says that if she wins compensation, she will donate the proceeds to a children’s charity.

Peppa’s earlier misdemeanours
It’s not the first time Peppa Pig and her colourful farmyard cronies have had a brush with the law. Earlier this year a counterfeit Peppa Pig costume was detained at customs in the UK, meaning the popular porcine was a no-show at the Cambridge Summer Fair.

We can only hope Peppa makes it out of this latest pickle unscathed. Snort!




http://www.kidspot.com.au/why-is-this-woman-suing-peppa-pig/

 

[TenEightyOne]

the popular “Gabriella Goat” character is called “Gabriella Capra” (which really messes with the whole Peppa Pig alliteration thing … ).

This reminded me of a certain Zoe Renault who took action against Renault to prevent them naming the Zoe "Zoe". Renault were, it seemed, quite experienced in fighting off such claims from similarly terminally-clueless people.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Renault were, it seemed, quite experienced in fighting off such claims from similarly terminally-clueless people.

Yes, they hired all of them to develop their 2014 engines.