Funny/Strange News Stories

[Rage Racer]

Russophobia will not do any good.
http://www.thelocal.de/20141121/bavaria-police-arrest-russia-proof-bunker-builder

Police arrest man over Russia-proof bunker

Police in Kelheim said on Friday they had arrested a man who hoarded guns, ammunition and bomb-making material in a nuclear-proof family bunker he built fearing an attack by Russia.

The 59-year-old electrician had constructed the emergency shelter by expanding and reinforcing the basement of his family home in the small town near Regensburg in Bavaria.

Police said they had confiscated two submachine guns, 80 rifles, 60 handguns, 20,000 rounds of ammunition and 40 kilogrammes of materials to make explosives.

"He was afraid of the threat posed by a large eastern European power. He was afraid of Russia," a police spokesman said.

 

[Grayfox]

He has all the right to be afraid.

He invaded Ukraine, He tried to invade australia, he stole some land from another country using an "election"

 

[Legro]

He has all the right to be afraid.

He invaded Ukraine, He tried to invade australia, he stole some land from another country using an "election"

Who is "he"? Do you mean the German man who is afraid of Russian invasion or Putin (who hasn't invaded anything) or Russia itself which arguably has invaded Crimea, but not even close of invading the whole Ukraine.

 

[Grayfox]

Who is "he"? Do you mean the German man who is afraid of Russian invasion or Putin (who hasn't invaded anything) or Russia itself which arguably has invaded Crimea, but not even close of invading the whole Ukraine.

Putin
Crimea was apart of the Ukraine which still means he invaded it

 

[Turbotwin01]

So this happened not too far from where I live....

http://www.insidehalton.com/news-st...urkeys-killed-in-erin-crash-has-been-refused/

 

[Bopop4]

So this happened not too far from where I live....

http://www.insidehalton.com/news-st...urkeys-killed-in-erin-crash-has-been-refused/

It's scary when stupid hits this close to home.
You hear about it all the time but in some far off land, it doesn't feel real until it's right on top of you.

 

[Rage Racer]

I think this is he who should have prepared a bunker full of guns, not that Russia-fearing man from Bavaria:
http://www.inquisitr.com/1600448/zu...to-muslim-customers-for-the-past-three-years/

A Swiss butcher is in hot water after he reportedly deceived Muslim customers for more than three years. According to Mad World News, the butcher is accused of false advertisement for telling customers the meat he sold was calf meat when it was actually pork.

 

[TenEightyOne]

I swear we get a couple of these every year in Britain; Festive Winter Wonderland Attraction Closes After Complaints.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

A guide to political double-speak:

http://mobile.abc.net.au/news/2014-11-28/pobjie-a-handy-guide-to-government-speak/5918408

 

[Furinkazen]

UKIP don't even know what a mosque is

 

[1241Penguin]

Man injured by Amsterdam pop-up toilet

Didn't even know it was possible.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Man injured by Amsterdam pop-up toilet

Didn't even know it was possible.

To be specific; the toilet deployed unexpectedly and fired a moped into the air. That's what the man was injured by. Not much of a clarification in the circumstances

 

[prisonermonkeys]

His Flatulence, The Little Dictator Who Could has nothing better to do with his time than haxxorz teh interwebz:

http://mobile.abc.net.au/news/2014-...ea-link-to-cyber-attack-after-threats/5928620

 

[TenEightyOne]

This isn't quite funny but it's peculiar; an art historian was watching Stuart Little (I hate that film) and recognised a lost Bereni on the wall... he contacted Sony Pictures and the work was indeed found to be an original.

In French so use your favourite translato-browser... I did try to find an English version of the story but couldn't.

 

[TenEightyOne]

"Driver escapes moments before sinkhole swallows car!".

Actually... sinkhole opens, remains static, is driven into by car whose driver then escapes despite what evolution tells us. BBC.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Remember kids, if you're in South Korea and you sell special phone-holding bluetooth sticks so that customers can take selfies from further than arm's length... you've got to be registered.

There's some sense in this... but the gadget's worth a read of the story just on its own

 

[Joel]

I'm as free market libertarian as the next guy but cracking down on selfie sticks is a legitimate function of government IMO.

 

[TenEightyOne]

If you're "lucky" enough to be on Anthony and Cherie's christmas card list then this is what you got this year. BBC. True story.

 

[DK]

It's like someone reminded him about Iraq.

 

[TenEightyOne]

It's like someone reminded him about Iraq.

Or Cherie.

 

[FoolKiller]

I was listening to the Adam Carolla Show podcast at work when he pointed out something he heard in the ESPN 30 for 30 No Mas, about the Sugar Ray Leonard vs Roberto Duran boxing matches in 1980.

If the time link doesn't work, skip to about 7:00.

(Is there a way to embed video to start at a certain point?)


Pay attention and you will catch this in the archived news footage.

What a difference 25 years has made. In 1980, knocking a woman out with one punch makes you an incredibly respected athlete. Do it today and you might never compete again.

 

[1241Penguin]

Police dog back on duty after sniffing cocaine

Hope he's not hooked.

 

[Touring Mars]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-mid-wales-30347723

A burglar stole a laptop from the wrong house and was caught when he tried to return it...

Sentencing him, Judge Richard Twomlow jailed James for four months suspended for 12 months with supervision and ordered him to complete the thinking skills programme.

 

[Pupik]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-wales-mid-wales-30347723

...and ordered him to complete the thinking skills programme.

The final boss is really hard, it's a three-headed beast of Socrates, Kant, and Lao Tzu. My temporal lobe was sore for days after using the controller!

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Last night there was a story on the news about Obama replacing Chuck Hagel as Secretary of Defence with Ashton Carter. Which is not, in and of itself a funny news story. But I was only half-listening, and so what I heard that Obama replaced Chuck Hagel as Secretary of Defence with Ashton Kutcher.

It's like someone reminded him about Iraq.

Or Cherie.

Or Cherie reminded him of Iraq.

 

[Grayfox]

Someone has too much time on their hands or he has enjoying the spice of life.

Spoiler

A GUERILLA condiment artist has been working the aisles of Woolworths supermarkets in Darwin.
Known only as Spice Man, he has targeted supermarkets with his unique and subversive art.

He is known to have woven his lettery magic at both the city and Karama Woolworths.

He arranges spice jars into different words, in a biting post modernist satire on a consumeristically delusional world where unrestrained individualism and money have become dominant obsessions - creating up a new dominant paradigm that conspires to crush an idea of collectivism and replacing other, kinder and more comprehensive normative visions.

Spoiler

So far he has spelt out “boobs”, “ballbags”, “fart”, “tits” and “crap”, as revealed in photos obtained exclusively by the NT News.

He focuses on the Woolworths “Select” home brand that feature labels with large letters taken from the first letter of the spice’s name.

TERRITORIANS’ SACRED PILGRIMAGE TO COCK-SHAPED TREE

He said his favourite spice is the most controversial of all spices, cumin.

“I really want this to help lead us to world peace,” said the heavily disguised man, who was wearing Territory rig with a cape when we met him under a bridge at night.

Spoiler

“It (creating world peace) is harder than you think coz there’s no spice that starts with E or U.

“Woolies or Coles really needs to pick up their game and start stocking some new spices.

“It’s affecting my work.

“But wherever marketers brand their products with large single letters I will be there.”

Spoiler

There are of course spices called, Elderflower, Epazote and Urfa Biber chillies, but they are not currently part of Spice Man’s favourite range.

CHEEKY CALL FOR NT ARSE MUSEUM

But Spice Man is fortunate there are no “U’s” or “E’s” or he could be up on obscenity charges.

Spice Man had attempted his flash art at Coles but reported a disappointing range of products featuring single large letters on their packaging.

Spoiler

Spoiler

It is believed by Darwin long-termers that Spice Man started out working with ice cream but was frustrated by the fleeting nature of his work.
He even has groupies, a large band of females collectively known as the Spice Girls. Spice Man will not say where he will strike next but it could be anywhere from Nhulunbuy to Alice Springs.


http://www.ntnews.com.au/news/north...illa-art-crusade/story-fnk0b1zt-1227147794793

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Ah, Darwin. Why you are named after the father of evolution is a mystery that may never be solved.

http://mobile.abc.net.au/news/2014-12-09/man-directs-traffic-using-frozen-peas-darwin/5953566

 

[Grayfox]

Lot of crazies up in darwin due to the heat and humility.

 

[LeMansAid]

Lot of crazies up in darwin due to the heat and humility.

While down south we're cold and egotistical.

Story checks out.

 

[FoolKiller]

Two brothers are political activists for opposing groups. They are debating on C-SPAN when a call comes in on the regular call-in line. The caller is their mom, telling them to knock it off before Christmas.

http://time.com/3635840/mom-calls-into-c-span-to-break-up-spat-between-sibling-political-rivals/