GR.3 Saturday

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ARL Breaking news:
Team Mello Yello has issued the following statement. After much deliberation both @TexasJDC and @Herimopp89 have agreed to terms to try and defend the team championship but it has came with a price. @Herimopp89 was seen kicking and screaming during the contract talks, not pleased to have a boat anchor for a teammate or might have been coming off of a laxitive high no one really knows or could really tell what set him off, his agent hannah would not go to bed until she got her vengeance with team mello yello so @Herimopp89 will be driving the VW Bug in protest for season 3. @TexasJDC was talking with McLaren but the opportunity to drive the 650s has passed due to his teammate @Herimopp89 episodes last season and constant tranquilizer and laxitive abuse McLaren is said to try to distance itself from the self destructing team and does not want to be linked to a horse tranquilizer/laxitive controversy. The team had been pursuing @Neutty during the off season but contract negotiations fell through when @Neutty had a unreasonable request for a 55 gallon drum of butt paste before every race as his signing bonus, the wild and outrageous request was quickly shot down (no one really knows why the high demand for butt paste was made leaving everyone on the grid to speculate the need for a 55 gallon drum of butt paste). Rumor has it @Jw_wk1010 wanted to join the team but could not reach the pedals making him ineligible to join team mello yello. @Nick Cannella was seen talking with reps from mello yello as part of a driver trade but fell asleep 5 minutes into the conversation and is probably still sleeping! That's all the news from the mello yello camp at this time stay tuned for more breaking news here at ARL.



Btw I'm switching to the jaguar!
 
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Room for 1 more tonight? I wont be running fulltime this season but I'd like to join in on the season opener. Will post car selection a little later if that's alright
 
We interrupt Donald Trumps STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS with this important announcement.

BadHaz Racing is debuting their Phenomenal work of art. @Jw_wk1010 is still drooling over what’s under the tarp. @Nick Cannella is still pissed off at the fact that @Jw_wk1010 is more worried about @Neutty’s hidden car than moving his pedals closer so he can reach full throttle and actually compete this season. @Nick Cannella has successfully installed a clicker in his car along with an ash tray! @Nick Cannella was reportedly seen tip toeing around BadHaz Racing grounds last night as he was nowhere to be found at the ARL practice night. @Neutty had this to say: “We saw a creepy looking creature wondering around, constantly seeing a “flash” of light around the face area, and a constant glow for a short amount of time.” The picture on the left is what @Nick Cannella looked like last season, and the picture on the right is the “Creep” that @Neutty reportedly saw on his security cameras.
319A2290-0ECD-4E54-A3DC-2A002672A900.jpeg


During ARL practice last night @Herimopp89 was on a Laxative high that we have never seen before. He kept shouting out to everyone from his car, while sitting in the pit area thinking he was racing, “Im so high on laxatives, wow I can’t even drive!” The Mello Yello team had sabotaged their own car for the safety of the other racers. Their team director even had this to say, “ @Herimopp89’s laxative high was so extreme that the team was seen over night in hazmat suits attempting to clean the inside of the car but only to fail. The FBI was called by track officials and they called the Pentagon wanting to drop an atomic bomb on the car to dispose of it properly. At 4am this morning 26 armored vehicles were seen at Barcelona with hundreds of police cars escorting them out to an unknown sight. At this point @Herimopp89’s Car was nowhere to be found in the garage area, and neither was the Mello Yello team. Reports showed that the team was at their Race Shop assembling a new car for @Herimopp89 to drive in tonight’s race! During this time @Ryan Kirk was soo baked on his version of laxatives and a flash of light we saw from the track in the distance had such a haze and stinch following it that the Tornado sirens were going off and everyone had evacuate to a concentration camp put together by @Nick Cannella back in the 40’s. After about a 2 hour dilemma everyone was allowed to go back to their respected areas of the track. Track workers were seen all over the track cleaning up what looked to be a brownish substance that accumulated on the track. Helicopters were seen flying in loads of water and dumping it on the stands and the track itself to help the clean up process. When everything calmed down, @Neutty was seen passed out with his arms wrapped around a 55 gallon drum of Butt Paste covered in a nasty brown substance. When @Neutty came to he was asked why he cared so much about about the Butt Paste, his excuse was, “I needed it because I was so Butt Hurt from being beaten by @Herimopp89..... erm, I mean, it’s the secret formula to tire softening and grip I needed it to get the extra grip.... erm, it’s for @Herimopp89 hes gotta need it from all that laxatives he’s been taking!” @TexasJDC is super numb and butt hurt about McLaren refusing to help Mello Yello out this season, that he was reportedly seen asking @Neutty for some of his butt paste. @Jw_wk1010 is fed up with his Death Wish team that he was threatening to dispose of them before the season even starts. @Jw_wk1010 had this to say, “These big 🤬‘s are totally worthless. They are late all the time, they don’t label half the stuff they are suppose to in the trailer, so now I have no idea where anything is! The Mello Yello team had come over and borrowed a battery for their car hauler to get @Herimopp89 car to the undisclosed location, those little 🤬‘s gave them 2 batteries! I’m so done with those POS!”

After all of this drama, track officials had this to say, “I have never seen such a cluster and dysfunctional BOD in our entire existence of this facility. They should be ashamed of themselves and should just give up on trying, we do wish them the best of luck, but we are HEAVILY fining the Mello Yello team for their littering on the track, and for our clean up efforts. Many of the track officials are in the hospital with an unknown plague after all of the trouble they went thru cleaning the track up, so we have to fine them to get their medical expenses paid! We are looking forward to hosting tonight’s races with the ARL sanctioning body knocking on the door of 3 lobbies this evening.”

Seriously guys, this is awesome to be knocking on 3 lobbies. Let’s make it happen all!!
 
Neutty
We interrupt Donald Trumps STATE OF THE UNION ADDRESS with this important announcement.

BadHaz Racing is debuting their Phenomenal work of art. @Jw_wk1010 is still drooling over what’s under the tarp. @Nick Cannella is still pissed off at the fact that @Jw_wk1010 is more worried about @Neutty’s hidden car than moving his pedals closer so he can reach full throttle and actually compete this season. @Nick Cannella has successfully installed a clicker in his car along with an ash tray! @Nick Cannella was reportedly seen tip toeing around BadHaz Racing grounds last night as he was nowhere to be found at the ARL practice night. @Neutty had this to say: “We saw a creepy looking creature wondering around, constantly seeing a “flash” of light around the face area, and a constant glow for a short amount of time.” The picture on the left is what @Nick Cannella looked like last season, and the picture on the right is the “Creep” that @Neutty reportedly saw on his security cameras.
View attachment 835471

During ARL practice last night @Herimopp89 was on a Laxative high that we have never seen before. He kept shouting out to everyone from his car, while sitting in the pit area thinking he was racing, “Im so high on laxatives, wow I can’t even drive!” The Mello Yello team had sabotaged their own car for the safety of the other racers. Their team director even had this to say, “ @Herimopp89’s laxative high was so extreme that the team was seen over night in hazmat suits attempting to clean the inside of the car but only to fail. The FBI was called by track officials and they called the Pentagon wanting to drop an atomic bomb on the car to dispose of it properly. At 4am this morning 26 armored vehicles were seen at Barcelona with hundreds of police cars escorting them out to an unknown sight. At this point @Herimopp89’s Car was nowhere to be found in the garage area, and neither was the Mello Yello team. Reports showed that the team was at their Race Shop assembling a new car for @Herimopp89 to drive in tonight’s race! During this time @Ryan Kirk was soo baked on his version of laxatives and a flash of light we saw from the track in the distance had such a haze and stinch following it that the Tornado sirens were going off and everyone had evacuate to a concentration camp put together by @Nick Cannella back in the 40’s. After about a 2 hour dilemma everyone was allowed to go back to their respected areas of the track. Track workers were seen all over the track cleaning up what looked to be a brownish substance that accumulated on the track. Helicopters were seen flying in loads of water and dumping it on the stands and the track itself to help the clean up process. When everything calmed down, @Neutty was seen passed out with his arms wrapped around a 55 gallon drum of Butt Paste covered in a nasty brown substance. When @Neutty came to he was asked why he cared so much about about the Butt Paste, his excuse was, “I needed it because I was so Butt Hurt from being beaten by @Herimopp89..... erm, I mean, it’s the secret formula to tire softening and grip I needed it to get the extra grip.... erm, it’s for @Herimopp89 hes gotta need it from all that laxatives he’s been taking!” @TexasJDC is super numb and butt hurt about McLaren refusing to help Mello Yello out this season, that he was reportedly seen asking @Neutty for some of his butt paste. @Jw_wk1010 is fed up with his Death Wish team that he was threatening to dispose of them before the season even starts. @Jw_wk1010 had this to say, “These big 🤬‘s are totally worthless. They are late all the time, they don’t label half the stuff they are suppose to in the trailer, so now I have no idea where anything is! The Mello Yello team had come over and borrowed a battery for their car hauler to get @Herimopp89 car to the undisclosed location, those little 🤬‘s gave them 2 batteries! I’m so done with those POS!”

After all of this drama, track officials had this to say, “I have never seen such a cluster and dysfunctional BOD in our entire existence of this facility. They should be ashamed of themselves and should just give up on trying, we do wish them the best of luck, but we are HEAVILY fining the Mello Yello team for their littering on the track, and for our clean up efforts. Many of the track officials are in the hospital with an unknown plague after all of the trouble they went thru cleaning the track up, so we have to fine them to get their medical expenses paid! We are looking forward to hosting tonight’s races with the ARL sanctioning body knocking on the door of 3 lobbies this evening.”

Seriously guys, this is awesome to be knocking on 3 lobbies. Let’s make it happen all!!
Click to expand...
Lol I see your stepping your game up! Nice report man
 
RACE-DAY CONFIRMATION FOR SEASON 3 OPENER: CURRENT GRID!
Below is a list of drivers that have an auto-confirm pending (green highlight), have already stated their intention to race (blue) or confirmed as tentative (grey) to race this Saturday, 7/13/19.
***NOTE***If you have an auto-confirm pending, or have previously confirmed, but will not be able to race, that statement must be made in this thread. Failure to do so will have a negative impact on your participation % and your overall status.
RACE DAY CONFIRMATION CLOSES ON SATURDAY, 7/13/19 AT 7PM CENTRAL/8PM EASTERN.

GR3 GRID.jpg
 
Extract:

"With the media whirlwind surrounding tonight's season opener at Catalunya, we've noticed that Cali has been MIA for most of afternoon practice. He was last spotted speaking with The Alien, also called @SAMHAIN85 in the pits just after lunch. Does this have anything to do with The Alien 3:16 confirming his intentions to take part in the season opener? Maybe, or maybe not. He then disappeared along with his agent and gtplanet representatives. Something is up and we'll get to the bottom of it."
 
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