Porn: good or bad?
- Thread starter Attila_Da_Hun
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Bingo, that's what I was trying to get at. Since she didn't have a lack of sexual development (ie. small chest, etc) then I don't think it's pedophilia.
No, of course you wouldn't be a weirdo.
Unless you chose her BECAUSE she appeared sexually under developed. THEN you're just harboring pedophilic thoughts (conciously or subconciously) and are getting as close to pedophilia as possible without breaking the law.
But adversely, if you're with a girl who IS 15 and is underdeveloped, but you didn't target her FOR that reason, then you're not a pedophile, you're just a sleezeball. Unless you were dating her before you turned 18, then it just sucks to be you.
And NBC should definately be ashamed of themselves. It's sad the garbage that's on TV today. Use to they had to put band-aids on women's nipples, now they seem to rub ice on them and turn the AC way up. (Have you watched Will & Grace? Though in that particular example I'm not complaining all that much...)
LOL and NYPD Blue has quite a few sex scenes (9PM Central, Tuesday on ABC) but I like that, as they're not faking us out with little kids that look mature. Plus they have a disclaimer after every commercial, and it's not a "reality" show.
--Jaster
I would have to disagree. Certainly some pedophiles are motivated because of a power issue, but there's also pedophiles who are solely motivated by images. Why else do you think the child porn industry is doing so good?
But I agree that viewing images of children does not make pedophiles, bad wiring and/or abuse does. And seeing a picture of a child may bring that pedophilia out of you, but it was already there.
--Jaster
Now my thumbs have rested and I'm gonna go finish up the F1 Championship (or at least 1 race... damn it's a long championship)
edit: and let's please change the subject back to regular porn... regular porn is fun, this **** we're talking about is sick.
- 10,832
Just th0ought I'd throw in that a guy in AZ got busted for kiddy porn and was sentenced to four hundred and something years in prison, for pictures.
Now as sick a puppy as this guy is, I can't believe that a murderer can go free on parole but this guy will never see freedom again.
Now as sick a puppy as this guy is, I can't believe that a murderer can go free on parole but this guy will never see freedom again.
- 606
- New York
- Mind_R1ot
It seems that murder of an adult is easier to explain away.
The first priority of the courts should be the protection of children, I don't know any details of this case, but I would think that the photos were the tip of the iceberg.
Yeah, I see the teenage girls at the mall, supermarket, etc. And I shake my head wondering why they didn't look that way when I was in school. I wonder about the parents, too, but they could send them out in Nuns' Habits, but by the time they get to the mall, they're all done up and in Daisy Dukes' n' tank tops. Kids...
That reminds me of the movie "Kids". Fine, it's a true-to-life depiction of teenagers and the rave scene and all, but I really didn't need to see such a graphic depiction of these kids having sex!! Fine, I did similar things at 14 or whatever, but you can bet it wasn't videotaped!! I wonder how many pediphiles own this DVD?!?
Jaster; I read your "term paper". Good stuff. Only thing I would say is you don't wanna protect your daughter Too much. The stereotypical "Catholic school girl" is real. At least in my experience it is.
lol, I realize that, which is why I say I'm sure I won't be able to accomplish it. I think about how I'll raise a son quite often, but whenever I think about raising a daughter as far as I get is "Please dear God don't give me a daughter, I'd have to kill every boy on the block, cuz I know what they're all thinking." My dad says he was blessed with 2 sons. (They wanted me to be a girl, and he thanks me every time I go see him, especially now that girls my age think they "style" is to dress like a whore.)
- 2,224
off topic! its still freaking alive! i though it would be one of those 2 day threads
- 9,209
- DerAlta
I'm going to reference back to jasper a few days ago
You want to protect your daughter as much as possible, yet you will let your 10 year old son think up thoughts about women. So where is he supposed to gain his outlet? Someone else's daughter? You can't protect one and let the other run wild. This is the flaw in your plan.
If eveone was to protect thier daughter in the same manner as you, young men would seek other available outlets. At what point does his need for an outlet (female contact) overcome his moral convictions? Also learned from you?
Just a few thoughts on a very insightful post.
AO
You want to protect your daughter as much as possible, yet you will let your 10 year old son think up thoughts about women. So where is he supposed to gain his outlet? Someone else's daughter? You can't protect one and let the other run wild. This is the flaw in your plan.
If eveone was to protect thier daughter in the same manner as you, young men would seek other available outlets. At what point does his need for an outlet (female contact) overcome his moral convictions? Also learned from you?
Just a few thoughts on a very insightful post.
AO
Ah, missed the next page.
Hm... yes I realize it appears rather hypocritical of me to let my son chase after women at any age he deems it appropriate to chase after women, and then not let my daughter leave the house. I'll do my best to explain why it is not hypocritical, at least in my mind. However, keep in mind that it is human nature to rationalize away our behaviors or beliefs that are hypocritical. Oh well, sue me.
It is my belief that boys and girls have 2 distinctly different roles in the mating process. At least under the age of 18.
Boys are meant to pursue girls.
Girls are meant to be pursued.
The father tries his best to aid his son in the pursuit of girls, and tries his best to stop the pursuit of his daughter. Actually he tries his best to stop the pursuit of his daughter by those he deems unworthy of her.
My role in my son's pursuit will be to lend advice on how to circumvent other fathers' defenses and not get shot in the process. However, if he does get shot then he obviously did something worth getting shot over and he deserves to be shot. I hope and pray that my son will have to deal with fathers like me in his pursuit of a suitable woman, as I feel it will be character building for him. I will also try and instill in him a moral sense that to pursue a girl just for sex is wrong, which will hopefully reduce the chances that he gets shot.
My role in my daughter's being pursued is to weed out all of the guys who are just after sex. I plan on doing this by having "the talk" with each and every one of them while I clean my personal arsenal of handguns and rifles. If he sticks around after that I figure he either thinks he's smarter than me and won't get caught, in which case he's a moron and will obviously get caught, and probably shot. Or he genuinely likes my daughter for who she is, not because I make her eat healthy. In the latter case I have no qualms about her seeing him... and if she decides to have sex with him I suppose I can't stop her. Though I will definately have my wife tell her how to protect herself.
Keep in mind that I truely don't plan on locking my daughter in her room, that's just what I wish I could do, since raising her properly and instilling in her an ability to make good character judgements as well as good decisions is going to be a huge pain in the ass that I most definately wish to avoid by not having a daughter. Though my sister just had a daughter, who is nearly a year old now and is the cutest damn baby ever... always a smile on her face... Never thought I'd actually enjoy being "Uncle Tommy". Strange how we all grow up, eh?
Anyway, I can't think of any girls names that I'd name my daughter so obviously I can't have a daughter. (John for a boy. "John Collins" mmm powerful And a drink, just like me "Tom Collins" so he can grow up just like me with people asking if his parents are alcoholics. And it has 3 different names, the full name, Jonathan, the short name John, and the family name, Johnny. Works good. I like it. Only thing is when you shout it in the house it can sound like "Tom" so it may get confusing)
I think about this way too much. I'm only 18, I don't want kids for at least another 7 years. Damn... only 7 years... I'm screwed I'm gonna have to mature a helluva lot in 7 years. Not to mention get a good job and a good woman. (Having kids with the wrong woman will screw up your life... Just ask my dad, he knows.)
Annnyway that's the role a father should take in his children's life as far as the opposite sex is concerned in my opinion. Call me old fashioned. (LOL how can I be old fashioned? I'm supposed to be a punk kid... dammit I wanna be a punk kid... damn father raised me too well methinks. We'll have to have another talk about that.)
I believe that my philosophy on child rearing can also be universally applied without contradiction. Though "lock her in her room" would contradict itself quite a bit since no one would be having sex and thus the human race would cease to exist. I just said "lock her in her room" because it conveys the sense of protectiveness I would feel for my daughter more than any other statement I could think of. And all I wanted to do was convey my sense of protectiveness clearly, though it was seen as over-protectiveness and thus I had to explain the statement in this post.
--Jaster
Edit: I didn't go into this much detail as to how I plan on raising my children in the first post I made on this thread because the first post was just about pornography, and how old my children would need to be before I let them see it. I think I'd let my son watch playboy-type porn whenever he didn't think it was "gross" and hustler-type when he was ~15.
Also keep in mind I have no children as of yet, so my views on the matter could change. Though I don't think so, I'm pretty happy with my view on child-rearing as I've seen it done properly (by my father) and improperly (by my mother). So I figure I have a sense of what to do and what not to do better than someone who's only seen either the proper or improper.
Hm... yes I realize it appears rather hypocritical of me to let my son chase after women at any age he deems it appropriate to chase after women, and then not let my daughter leave the house. I'll do my best to explain why it is not hypocritical, at least in my mind. However, keep in mind that it is human nature to rationalize away our behaviors or beliefs that are hypocritical. Oh well, sue me.
It is my belief that boys and girls have 2 distinctly different roles in the mating process. At least under the age of 18.
Boys are meant to pursue girls.
Girls are meant to be pursued.
The father tries his best to aid his son in the pursuit of girls, and tries his best to stop the pursuit of his daughter. Actually he tries his best to stop the pursuit of his daughter by those he deems unworthy of her.
My role in my son's pursuit will be to lend advice on how to circumvent other fathers' defenses and not get shot in the process. However, if he does get shot then he obviously did something worth getting shot over and he deserves to be shot. I hope and pray that my son will have to deal with fathers like me in his pursuit of a suitable woman, as I feel it will be character building for him. I will also try and instill in him a moral sense that to pursue a girl just for sex is wrong, which will hopefully reduce the chances that he gets shot.
My role in my daughter's being pursued is to weed out all of the guys who are just after sex. I plan on doing this by having "the talk" with each and every one of them while I clean my personal arsenal of handguns and rifles. If he sticks around after that I figure he either thinks he's smarter than me and won't get caught, in which case he's a moron and will obviously get caught, and probably shot. Or he genuinely likes my daughter for who she is, not because I make her eat healthy. In the latter case I have no qualms about her seeing him... and if she decides to have sex with him I suppose I can't stop her. Though I will definately have my wife tell her how to protect herself.
Keep in mind that I truely don't plan on locking my daughter in her room, that's just what I wish I could do, since raising her properly and instilling in her an ability to make good character judgements as well as good decisions is going to be a huge pain in the ass that I most definately wish to avoid by not having a daughter. Though my sister just had a daughter, who is nearly a year old now and is the cutest damn baby ever... always a smile on her face... Never thought I'd actually enjoy being "Uncle Tommy". Strange how we all grow up, eh?
Anyway, I can't think of any girls names that I'd name my daughter so obviously I can't have a daughter. (John for a boy. "John Collins" mmm powerful And a drink, just like me "Tom Collins" so he can grow up just like me with people asking if his parents are alcoholics. And it has 3 different names, the full name, Jonathan, the short name John, and the family name, Johnny. Works good. I like it. Only thing is when you shout it in the house it can sound like "Tom" so it may get confusing)
I think about this way too much. I'm only 18, I don't want kids for at least another 7 years. Damn... only 7 years... I'm screwed I'm gonna have to mature a helluva lot in 7 years. Not to mention get a good job and a good woman. (Having kids with the wrong woman will screw up your life... Just ask my dad, he knows.)
Annnyway that's the role a father should take in his children's life as far as the opposite sex is concerned in my opinion. Call me old fashioned. (LOL how can I be old fashioned? I'm supposed to be a punk kid... dammit I wanna be a punk kid... damn father raised me too well methinks. We'll have to have another talk about that.)
I believe that my philosophy on child rearing can also be universally applied without contradiction. Though "lock her in her room" would contradict itself quite a bit since no one would be having sex and thus the human race would cease to exist. I just said "lock her in her room" because it conveys the sense of protectiveness I would feel for my daughter more than any other statement I could think of. And all I wanted to do was convey my sense of protectiveness clearly, though it was seen as over-protectiveness and thus I had to explain the statement in this post.
--Jaster
Edit: I didn't go into this much detail as to how I plan on raising my children in the first post I made on this thread because the first post was just about pornography, and how old my children would need to be before I let them see it. I think I'd let my son watch playboy-type porn whenever he didn't think it was "gross" and hustler-type when he was ~15.
Also keep in mind I have no children as of yet, so my views on the matter could change. Though I don't think so, I'm pretty happy with my view on child-rearing as I've seen it done properly (by my father) and improperly (by my mother). So I figure I have a sense of what to do and what not to do better than someone who's only seen either the proper or improper.
I think porn is a good way to release when you can't seem to get laid and don't have a girlfriend. But having a relationship and still looking at porn is bad, it projects alot of ill feelings on the person you're with. It's just plain annoying when a person I'm with looks at porn all day, and then when I arrive wants to release all those weird fantasies on to me without me having a clue what's going on in their head. The way that I'm thinking about having sex is that I'm turned on by the other person, not some video I just watched. I wouldn't want to have some porn fantasy rolling around in my head when I'm having sex with the person I care for and love.
Anyways, I'm new here, and thought this was a great poll.
Anyways, I'm new here, and thought this was a great poll.
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- Midlantic Area
- GTP_Duke
I sincerely hope your views change a little. I know nothing about your upbringing, but I have to say this is an absolutely scary essay on how to raise a child. I know you mean well, but I'd give myself 10 years or so before having kids if I were you.
- 606
- New York
- Mind_R1ot
I haven't looked at this thread in months. I have to agree with 'Duke, Jaster. I think you have A LOT of growing up to do before you have children. I don't even know where to begin.
I was looking in my bulk mail folder for porn (go figure) and I found this old subscription.
Well, it's been 9 months and I still stand by my views of how to raise children, which is, with no confusing fluff:
1) Instill a sense of morality in your son so he does not pursue women solely for the use of their body.
2) Allow your son an outlet for his sexual frustration (porn) at whatever age he starts getting sexual frustration.
3) Try and help your daughter find boyfriends who are not after her solely for her body.
4) Shelter my daughter and not my son for the following reason:
In my opinion, men protect women. That is how it is, has been, and should always be. Women are unarguably the physically weaker sex, and arguably the emotionally weaker sex. (I do not want to get into an argument over this particular point, it is my opinion, and I have thought about it quite a bit.)
Because of this I feel my son should lead a decidedly less sheltered life than my daughter because there will be no one there to shelter him when he is an adult.
However, because men naturally shelter women my daughter will have someone to shelter her when she is an adult (boyfriends, husband). This sheltering later in life will allow me to do with my daughter what I, and most everyone else I assume, would naturally like to do with all of their children (shelter them from evil forever, which is just not possible).
To me my opinion in this matter does not stem from fact, but from my own instincts, as none of the points in my argument are factual or can be proven in any way. They are just how I feel, and most guys will probably agree with me to a large degree, even if they won't admit it aloud for fear of their girlfriends finding out about it.
I'm done posting here unless there's just absolutely something that I MUST respond to.
Now where is that porn i was lookin for...?
--Jaster
Well, it's been 9 months and I still stand by my views of how to raise children, which is, with no confusing fluff:
1) Instill a sense of morality in your son so he does not pursue women solely for the use of their body.
2) Allow your son an outlet for his sexual frustration (porn) at whatever age he starts getting sexual frustration.
3) Try and help your daughter find boyfriends who are not after her solely for her body.
4) Shelter my daughter and not my son for the following reason:
In my opinion, men protect women. That is how it is, has been, and should always be. Women are unarguably the physically weaker sex, and arguably the emotionally weaker sex. (I do not want to get into an argument over this particular point, it is my opinion, and I have thought about it quite a bit.)
Because of this I feel my son should lead a decidedly less sheltered life than my daughter because there will be no one there to shelter him when he is an adult.
However, because men naturally shelter women my daughter will have someone to shelter her when she is an adult (boyfriends, husband). This sheltering later in life will allow me to do with my daughter what I, and most everyone else I assume, would naturally like to do with all of their children (shelter them from evil forever, which is just not possible).
To me my opinion in this matter does not stem from fact, but from my own instincts, as none of the points in my argument are factual or can be proven in any way. They are just how I feel, and most guys will probably agree with me to a large degree, even if they won't admit it aloud for fear of their girlfriends finding out about it.
I'm done posting here unless there's just absolutely something that I MUST respond to.
Now where is that porn i was lookin for...?
--Jaster
- 9,209
- DerAlta
And excellent thought process, and a very good,strong stance and reasoning behind it. Here's a thought to keep in mind, What happens if your daughter doesn't find a good man to shield and comfort her emotions? I'll agree with every point you've got up there, but add that you may want to consider other scenarios.
What it looks like up there, is that your girl is already destined to be married as soon as she leaves your house. Are you really expecting her to always have a man to turn to? Can you expect her to become and independent thinker, like you, if you teach and instill a sense that she will always have to turn to a man every time she needs help?
I commend your beliefs, and would expect nothing less from a good father. To want and desire to give your daughter the protection she needs and deserves is a rare quality in this world. All I ask is teach her that she is strong, and can turn to you if she needs it. You'll be there in a heart beat. But she'll also need to do some things on her own.
My wife was raised in a very similar fashion. Her father always taught her to depend on a man for everything. It's created a few strong issues in our relationship, and we're working through them. It's not easy, and to be 30 and just learning speaks volumes about how her parents chose to shelter her.
Please don't make that mistake.
Good luck, and best wishes.
And much like all the other childless people out there, I seem to think I have all the answers for raising children. I suppose you're wondering why I am even continuing this conversation? Well, while I don't have kids, I do have a future. My future depends on the people raising children now. I'll at some point have to hire a person to work for me. I want to hire the best people out there, and with the current status of education and society, it's looking tough to find a good worker.
AO
HenrySwanson
(Banned)
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- United Kingdom
Figure this is the best place for it now.
Addiction is fascinating:
Addiction is fascinating:
- 11,639
- Intercourse, PA
- Carbonox
All I can say is yee-haw, was the internet ever a wild place 20 years ago for this post to go almost unchallenged back then. Guy's 18 and at least wants to be a "punk kid" by his own admission, yet talks about his potential kids with the energy of a cartoonish, stereotypically aggressive gun-totin' Texan boomer. Oh, goody.
Well, at least it was sort of a treat to read, in the sense that it's like a time window into a foreign age.
HenrySwanson
(Banned)
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- GTP_Duke
I'm actually surprised that 20-years-younger me let him off that lightly instead of ripping him a new one.
By the way, Carbonox, if you're really in Intercourse, you're only about half an hour away from me.
[edit] Oh, and 20 years later, apparently my opinion of porn (or my ideal female body) hasn't changed much.
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McLaren
Premium
- 45,515
- Texas
Unfortunately, the guy revealed he was nothing more than a product of his father's antique views. Shooting the boy chasing your daughter? Bold move into today's society where the guy may be carrying himself.
I'd wonder if the guy changed his views since he had enough sense to self reflect on what he was saying as questionable, but based on other posts at the time & him coming from my neck of the woods, I'm betting he's dug in even further with his outdated belief.
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