The First Little Ponies
On the other end of the illustration spectrum is the Capodilista Codex, a series of illustrations commissioned by 15th century Italian ambassador Giovan Capodilista. At first glance, everything about the pictures is what you'd expect from Renaissance art. There are knights and ladies on horses and -- hold up. There's something weird about those horses.
I can't quite put my finger on it.
Oh, now I see it. The horses want to do me.
"There's nothing little about this pony... ladies."
Regardless of who is riding the horse or whatever important words are printed in the air behind it, each and every pony looks like it wants to have sex, like, right now. Some of them are looking at the viewer, and some of them are looking back at the rider. No matter where they're looking, they've got heavy-lidded, lusty gazes. This one has a tractor beam on his male rider's lopsided boob plates.
"You should see his codpiece."
And it's smiling -- IT'S SMILING. Horse after horse features a coquettish little nodded head and what I can only assume is mascara. The cumulative effect is that there's a whole army of horses with bedroom eyes.
"My mind's telling me neighhhh ..."
"But my body, my body's telling me yeeeeesss!"
There are only two possible explanations for these sex-hungry colts. One is that the anonymous artist was the first brony. Two, and most likely, the horses really did look like that because they were all possessed by someone from the future -- someone known for her sexy, heavily medicated gaze.
Seventy-five percent of you are going to have really weird dreams tonight.