- 15,177
- Grandville Mi
- Gotbeefboy564
- Got beef boy564
some say he can do a lap of the nurburgring with his eyes closed. others say he can do a lap of le mans in a minuet all we know is he is called the stig.
Top Gear: Post your Stig intros here.
- Thread starter Mr. Boy
- 154 comments
- 47,305 views
braunracing88
(Banned)
- 908
- Troy, MI, USA
- braunracing88
Here are some of my favorite Stig intros:
Some say that he invented November. And that if he'd won the World Championship last weekend in Brazil, there might've been one photo of him without his father gurning in the back of shot.
Some say he invented Branson Pickle. And that if you insult his mother, he will head-butt you in the chest.
Some say that in the autumn, his arms turn brown and fall off. And that if he wrote you a letter of condolences, he would at least have the courtesy to get your name right.
Some say that he has some terrible plans regarding the moon. And that he was turned down for a spot on I'm A Celebrity, because he is one.
Some say that his new line of Christmas fragrances includes the terrific scent of Wednesday. And that he was turned down for the job of EU president, because his face is just too recognizable.
Some say that his discharge is luminous. And that even as we speak, he is appearing on the main stage at Glastonbury performing his most famous hit, "Superstition".
Some say there are 17 reasons why he's banned from the North Hampton branch of Little Chef. And that his favorite airline pilot is Mark Webber.
Some say that if you hold him the wrong way, he doesn't work properly. And that only recently, he developed an irrational hatred of Rubens Barrichello.
Some say that he spent all week daydreaming about what Rubens Barrichello would look like in a ham slicer. And that he's terrified the BBC will reveal his salary, because he's paid in strong pornography.
Some say the Scottish released him a little bit too soon. And that he spent all week pushing an effigy of Rubens Barrichello through his desk fan.
Some say that recently he's been releasing a series of pop albums under the pseudonym Lady Gaga. And that underneath his racing suit, he too, wears a red G-string and suspenders.
Some say that in his wallet, he keeps a photograph of his wallet. And that in a recent race, even he was beaten by The King's Speech.
Some say that his favorite disease he had as a child was gout. And that he was very surprised when he scored remarkably cheap tickets for the Bahrain Grand Prix.
Some say that he's the only man in Britain who knows what B & Q stands for. And that he can't give his million pound bonus back, because he's already spent it... on French breast implants.
And now for an original one. Since most Stig cousins get some similar intro, I thought I'd come up with such an intro for one who didn't. Here it is:
Some say that he's seen Shanghai Knights 500 times. And that he's absolutely baffled by fan remarks claiming that Po and Tigress will be a couple in Kung Fu Panda 3. All we know is, he's not the Stig, but he is the Stig's Chinese cousin.
Some say that he invented November. And that if he'd won the World Championship last weekend in Brazil, there might've been one photo of him without his father gurning in the back of shot.
Some say he invented Branson Pickle. And that if you insult his mother, he will head-butt you in the chest.
Some say that in the autumn, his arms turn brown and fall off. And that if he wrote you a letter of condolences, he would at least have the courtesy to get your name right.
Some say that he has some terrible plans regarding the moon. And that he was turned down for a spot on I'm A Celebrity, because he is one.
Some say that his new line of Christmas fragrances includes the terrific scent of Wednesday. And that he was turned down for the job of EU president, because his face is just too recognizable.
Some say that his discharge is luminous. And that even as we speak, he is appearing on the main stage at Glastonbury performing his most famous hit, "Superstition".
Some say there are 17 reasons why he's banned from the North Hampton branch of Little Chef. And that his favorite airline pilot is Mark Webber.
Some say that if you hold him the wrong way, he doesn't work properly. And that only recently, he developed an irrational hatred of Rubens Barrichello.
Some say that he spent all week daydreaming about what Rubens Barrichello would look like in a ham slicer. And that he's terrified the BBC will reveal his salary, because he's paid in strong pornography.
Some say the Scottish released him a little bit too soon. And that he spent all week pushing an effigy of Rubens Barrichello through his desk fan.
Some say that recently he's been releasing a series of pop albums under the pseudonym Lady Gaga. And that underneath his racing suit, he too, wears a red G-string and suspenders.
Some say that in his wallet, he keeps a photograph of his wallet. And that in a recent race, even he was beaten by The King's Speech.
Some say that his favorite disease he had as a child was gout. And that he was very surprised when he scored remarkably cheap tickets for the Bahrain Grand Prix.
Some say that he's the only man in Britain who knows what B & Q stands for. And that he can't give his million pound bonus back, because he's already spent it... on French breast implants.
And now for an original one. Since most Stig cousins get some similar intro, I thought I'd come up with such an intro for one who didn't. Here it is:
Some say that he's seen Shanghai Knights 500 times. And that he's absolutely baffled by fan remarks claiming that Po and Tigress will be a couple in Kung Fu Panda 3. All we know is, he's not the Stig, but he is the Stig's Chinese cousin.
- 1,471
- hennessey_86 and GTP_evox
- hennessey861
Some say he's rubbish at Pacman and that if he were president he would ban any car without a v12, all we know s he's called bill cli...... No wait the stig
