Top Gear: Post your Stig intros here.

[Daniel]

Some say that he can talk to ducks. And that his time on the Nurburgring was twenty seconds under Zero, on a giraffe. All we know, he's called The Stig

 

[Stiggy]

And now it's time to hand it over to our tame racing driver.

Some say that he once beat Chuck Norris in a fight and that he passes wind with the same note as a V8 engine. All we know is that he is called The Stig.

 

[DK]

Some say that he knocked out Muhammad Ali in 3 seconds, and that he drew a cartoon with the Prophet Muhammad in it drinking beer with Jesus, and that he's GT5 compatible. All we know is that he's called the Stig.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Some say that he can divide by zero and that he understands the lyrics to Smells Like Teen Spirit. All we know is that he's called The Stig.

 

[mynameissport]

And now it's time to hand it over this car to the test track to our tame racing driver.

Some say his vocals were responsible for the Daytona USA songs.
Or at once, he preposterously had an affair with Kazunori Yamauchi.
All we know is he's called the Stig.

 

[gt50]

Some say he has a pet 2CV and that if he had designs the Olympic mascots they both would have been call Blomgvist.

Some say he likes the The Doobie Brothers and that if he wanted to he could beat Deep Blue.

Some say he has monosyllabic deafness and if he wanted to he could run in the Labour Leadership race. All we know is he’s call Stig Miliband.

Some say he tells sat-navs where to go and that he can’t resist stealing crisps. All we know is he’s called Stigy Lineker

 

[Stiggy]

Some say that it will be revealed this November that he is controlled by someone sitting on a sofa holding a PS3 controller and that this is probably true as he is going to be a playable character in Gran Turismo 5. All we know is that he is called The Stig.

 

[Pescara for GT5]

He doesn't always drink beer, but when he does, he drinks Dos Equis, he is also the stig.

 

[DK]

Some say he can understand the new Head and Shoulders ad.

 

[Golfman]

Some say he was concieved in the back of Steve McQueen's Mustang shortly before he started that epic car chase in Bullitt, and that ol'e Queeno was his dad. All we know is he's called the Stig.

Some say he has a pet goldfish at home he names 'VEYRON'. All we know is he's called the Stig.

Some say his white helmet isn't actually a helmet but his actual head, and that he is in fact an android from a far distant planet known as JezHamsterMay. All we know ....etc

Some say under that helmet he is in fact Kazanori Yamauchi, and that his appearances on Top Gear are why GT5 is taking so long to come out. All we know .....etc

Some say that when he finally finds a Mrs Stig they will concieve an she will give birth to a quadruplet of white Fiat 500 Abarths. All we know etc....

Some say that the shape of his......little Stig is the inspiration for the gearstick of the next generation of Vauxhall Corsa. All we know etc.....

Some say that when given the G-Whiz to do a test lap, he instead offered to do a race where someone would drive th G-Whiz and he would drive a VW Lupo, but with no engine and a hole cut in the floor so he could do it Flintsone style.

Some say he is actually Lord Lucan. All we know is he's called the Stig.

 

[DK]

Some say that he was denied a loan application to build a Death Star, hoping to destroy Planet Jedward.

 

[Ibonibo]

Some say he was photgraphed by cocky journalists and now goes berserker on Fifth Gear studio.

Did some of you heard about that. BBC is trying to block the image from getting published.
All the jokes will be worthless then

 

[tlowr4]

Here's one.

-----------------------
Some say that his favorite singer is Leona Lewis, others say that his legs are fake...all we know is...Hes CALLED THE STIG!!

 

[Peter]

Some say he's Ben Colins, and that he's Ben Collins... All we know is, he's Ben Collins.

 

[CTznOfTime]

"Some say the tame racing driver is a 'Greedy Tw*t' ...., all we know is he just want to publish his memoirs/book/personal journal... "

 

[Sparty_McFly]

Some say he's Ben Collins, that he eats engine grease out of pudding containers - if he eats at all, with a heaping side of engine coolant. Some say he's solar powered (maybe that was from the show), or nuclear-powered. Some say he invented nuclear fusion, the art of drifting, and the concept of a heliocentric universe, but he lets Galileo take credit for that, in exchange for getting NASA to name the Jupiter spaceprobe after him. All we know is, he's called The Stig.

 

[tlowr4]

Here's one
---------------------------------
Some say he's 'Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious', others tend to agree, all we know is he's Mary Poppins!

Cheers,

t4

 

[Daniel]

Some say only he can win The Game (and on that note, you all lose). And that some isolated villages around the world worship him as their sex god. All we know, he's called the Stig.

Some say he's the Cigar Guy, and that only Famine can control him. All we know, he's called the Stig.

 

[Wiegert]

Some say that when he looks at a white VW Scirocco, he thinks it's his own reflection, and that he has an irrational fear of Duracell Batteries. All we know is, he's called The Stig.

 

[stig's helmet]

Some say he has no head and that his long lost brother is Boris Johnson, all we know is he's called the stig!

 

[Beliall]

Some say, if you take off his head, there's shower gel inside, all we know is, he's called the stig

 

[opladener]

Some say, he knows when GT5 is going to come out, others say he's the reason they delayed it. All we know is that he's called the Stig.

Some say, he knows what KY means with "soon", others say he's the real Kevin Butler. All we know is that he's called the Stig.

 

[stig's helmet]

Some say that he once chucked chuck norris to the ground and that he drinks brake fluid, all we know is he's called the stig.

 

[CTznOfTime]

👍 good one stig's helmet

 

[Azure Flare]

Some say that he once chucked chuck norris to the ground and that he drinks brake fluid, all we know is he's called the stig.

I prefer transmission fluid.

 

[stig's helmet]

^ Done deal. And thanks CTznOfTime

 

[Pumbaa NZ]

Its time to hand the Nissan Micra over to our tame racing driver.
Some say that he breaths through gills and that his suit is actually a water pressure suit, all we know is... hes called THE STIG!

 

[250 GTO]

Some say he likes swiss cheese, but only ever eats the holes, all we know is he's called The Shtig

 

[HumanDestroyah]

and that he roams around the woods at night foraging for wolves...


Post your best/favorite Stig quotes, maybe you've heard one we haven't.

 

[Jujamun]

Some say he only knows 2 facts about ducks and there both wrong