F1 Caption Game 2018: VOTING - RD21 - Open to Mon 17th Dec 1000 GMTFormula 1

[LewyOs]

E - 2
G - 1

Done.

 

[peterjford]

1. V
2. T
3. B

 

[Lizard]

J-2
V-1
caps

 

[Touring Mars]

ROUND FIVE - Voting

• Please see the rules in Post #1 before casting your vote
  
• You have three votes which may be split two ways (2-1) or three ways (1-1-1)
  
• Remember your vote is final and cannot be edited or changed, otherwise it will be discounted
  
• Please read all entries before voting
  
• Deadline for voting is Monday 37th May 6th June 0900 BST
  
• Good luck!

Submitted Entries​

Alonso: I'm so excited for this race, can't wait! How about you, Felipe?

Felipe: Cool, an Angry Birds update!

While everyone else looked racey coming into Spain, the Ferrari drivers were looking pretty fiiine.

Felipe: Who IS this guy? He keeps killing me at Mafia Wars...
Alonso:..*cough*hehehehe

Felipe: lol, no points again. He should give up and quit.

Fernando: Nonsense, they need a backmarker to laugh at miserably

Alonso: "I just got another 5 years on my contract"

Massa: "So did I, with unlimited texts"

Anonymous guy: Hello, who's is this?
Alonso: Yeah, I am [Fernando] Alonso. 💡
Anonymous: Uhhh... wrong number...
Alonso: (hangs up phone)
Massa: Who's the guy calling you?
Alonso: Unknown guy. He's dialing to me mistakenly!
Massa:

Felipe Massa: Giancarlo says "Congratulations on the new contract"...... oh and Kimi says "See you in Nascar in 2 years...."

Rob Smedley: Felipe, Fernando is taller than you. Can you confirm you understood this text message?

Massa: Hey look, I'm winning at this F1 game!
Alonso: Hey look, I'm winning in real life

The cause of Massa's off is finally revealed

Text message: "Felipe, you are not to discuss Fernando's incident with the panini press. We are trying to hide the accident by putting his junk in plain view."

Fernando Alonso: "I can almost smell the victory already. It's like a sixth sense."
Felipe Massa: "Actually ... that would be one of the five."

Felipe, I feel good about this weekend. Our new car is absolutely unbeatable!

A minute, 'nando, I have a message... "Felipe, baby, this is Rob... About that new wing..."

Felipe Massa: Relying on Google Maps to get around since 2009.

Massa: I just got my longest snake ever...
Alonso: I didn't need to know that.

[On text]: Hey Felipe, this guy is replacing u next year. *Picture of Nick Heidfeld*
Massa: Hey, someones sent me a picture message saying that I'm going to be replaced by Obi-wan Kenobi next year.

The Ferrari drivers decide to walk; its faster than driving!

*Alonso's phone rings*

Alonso: You there, Philip is it? Answer that!

Alonso distracts Massa with Tetris while he thinks of somewhere to hide Massa's spark plugs.

FA - Felipe, I cannot wait until Monaco, the women are so beautiful there!
FM - Uno momento Fernando, I'm just BBM'ing your mother.

Phone displays "I'm faster than you. Can you confirm you understand this message?"
Felipe replies "No, I've stuck with that now. Sorry."

Fernando: "No, she hasn't really been replying to my texts.."
Felipe: "OK, let me put that in.... Alright, the App says there's a 0% chance shes into you"
Fernando: "Better than I expected. I'll go talk to her now."

Round Six - Monaco will follow next Monday​

 

[PeterJB]

A-1
H-1
J-1

Caps.

 

[mafia_boy]

J - 1.
P - 1.
R - 1.

 

[C-ZETA]

A - 1
J - 1
U - 1

Caps

 

[Pupik]

K, E, O - 1 point each

*** Non-championship, don't count nor vote for this caption ***

Alonso: You know, just because I look like Vincent Chase, and you look like Turtle, doesn't mean you have drive like one...

 

[livemusic]

S - 2
E - 1

Caps.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

E - 2
C - 1

Done.

 

[RACECAR]

D - 1
E - 2


Rubbish.

 

[Jimlaad43]

d-2
j-1

 

[niky]

I think I smell a clear winner here, and it's not Alonso's underwear...

E -2
A -1

 

[Touring Mars]

O - 2
E - 1

Damn, I forgot to implement my ingenious plan to circumnavigate the caps issue, stay tuned next week though 💡

 

[ADEuk]

O - 1
H - 2

caP.s?

 

[Pezzarinho17]

G - 2
n - 1

 

[zippy_the_cat]

E - 2
p - 1

 

[BlacqueJacques]

E-1
j-1
o-1

 

[BlacqueJacques]

💡

Massa, calling Montreal ladies (for Alonzo)

Edit: Stupid me, double post

 

[mPWRD]

A-1
e-1
g-1

 

[Alex.]

g-1
e-1
o-1

 

[LewyOs]

E - 1
O - 1
W - 1

Done.

 

[Touring Mars]

ROUND SIX - Voting

• Please see the rules in Post #1 before casting your vote
  
• You have three votes which may be split two ways (2-1) or three ways (1-1-1)
  
• Remember your vote is final and cannot be edited or changed, otherwise it will be discounted
  
• Please read all entries before voting
  
• Deadline for voting is Monday 20th June 0900 BST
  
• Good luck!

Submitted Entries

Bernie: "No, this isn't what I meant when I said I'd love to motorboat you."

Bernie takes a page out of Max Mosley's playbook and asks the lady if she would like to be his "poop deck".

Bernie: We're gonna need a bigger boat.

Bernie Ecclestone: "I'm on a boat! I'm on a boat! Everybody look at me, 'cause I'm standin' on a boat!"

"Here we are, behind the scenes before the boat chase..."

Bernie: Do you intend on rowing this, gently down the stream?

I would row my dear, but I have arthritis in my knee...

The Bernie impersonator gets rumbled by his new lady friend when he takes her back to his "£36.5million yacht sitting in the harbour."

Bernie: You've heard of the new World Endurance Series, right? Well, apparently, I served as... ahem.. inspiration. *winks*

Bernie takes a girl off to show her his wood, she was somewhat relieved.

Bernie: "No, YOU row!"

Bernie: Can you reach the steering wheel?

Always keen to strike a good deal, Bernie negotiates terms for an hour on the Virgin Hospitality Boat

Bernie: My knees are killing me woman...
Girl: I dont care, your not finished.

Bernie Ecclestone, CEO Formula One Management, shows a young woman around his boat.

The young lady had misheard Bernie when he said that she had the keys to a wood boat in his pants.

Yes, young lady, I would glady sit with you and discuss the socio-political ramifications of holding the Bahrain GP later this year, as well as how it would further strain my already precarious position with the FOTA, but... frankly, my dear, I couldn't give a damn.

Now get out of my boat... I have a party to attend at Mosley's yacht...

Yes, my dear. It is smaller than all the others but you know what they say. Size doesn't matter

Lady: Let's take off Bernie - this is the wrong boat.
Bernie: Oh, yeah. But which one?

Bernie: Excuse me Miss, I can't seem to find my way back to the paddock...

Lady: Well don't ask me, I'm in the same boat...

"No dear, i said if i treat you to a trip to Monaco would you give me a little tug"

"Baby, you know how I know this boat is mine? We both have a lot of wood."

Bernie: So what skills would you bring to the position as my personal assistant:

Female: Well if no one is looking, I'll show you!

Bernie: "Let them up for air in a minute and ask them again who told them Formula 1 was for sale. I'm going to go some quick dry cement."

Bernie: Quick row, I see two teams of 12 U.S. Navy SEALs moving this way.

Bernie: Yes my lady, the boat is nice, but all yachts in the harbour must cost at least 2 million pounds. Now please, get out of my Grand Prix area.

Apparently at random, this boat is scrutineered after the race and later the owner was given a "20 second penalty of talking to Bernie Ecclestone". When asked about it, a certain driver labelled it as "a fricking joke" and pointed blame at the boats colour.

This was later misinterpreted as the driver defending some poor driving earlier that day.

Bernie: This everyone who wants to go to Bahrain?

BE: "Who are you?"
Woman: "I'm the one Mr. Mosley recommended..."
BE: "Oh, behave!"
Woman (in strict voice): "Silence."

Bernie has words with the woman who claimed to be a professional poker player: Inside his house

Bernie: I think this is Mosley's boat.
Woman: how can you tell?
Bernie: the Nazi uniforms on the floor.

Round Seven - Canada will follow next Monday​

 

[TheCracker]

t - 2
l - 1

 

[daan]

T - 2
H - 1

Caps thingummy

 

[livemusic]

T - 2
z - 1

 

[prisonermonkeys]

AA - 2
A - 1

Done.

 

[adamp93]

bb-2
i-1

 

[Jimlaad43]

F-1
aa-2

 

[Omnis]

PeterJB ruined my wood joke. Negative 3 points.