F1 Caption Game - Archive ThreadFormula 1

[Ingram]

For the last time, I look nothing like him! Stop trying to make me say 'when's-a your Dolmio day?'​

 

[prisonermonkeys]

"Hi, I'm Fernando Alonso, race driver for Scuderia Ferrari.

"You might not know this, but one of the biggest dangers to racing drivers today is Venezuelans. Sub-standard conditions and a lack of government support in Venezuela has lead to a situation where driving standards are at an all-time low. The government denies this, but statistically, Venezuelan drivers are the leading cause of retirements in Formula 1. And because of this, racing drivers are living in fear of an epidemic of 'El Passo Recklesso', an incurable disease that impairs a driver's spatial awareness, judgement and ability to admit he was wrong, and which is impervious to grid penalties, fines, reprimands and time penalties.

"But there is hope. For just a dollar a day, you can sponsor a Venezuelan driving instructor, and make sure he gets proper training and will raise driving standards to ensure that future generations of racing drivers have nothing to fear from Venezuelans. So please, give generously."

 

[Flex0r]

Alonso: Why doesn't this chair spin around.

 

[lbsf1]

"Ah, Jean Todt, I have been waiting for you"

 

[Touring Mars]

Look Felipe, maybe when you've won two World Championships and are leading the Driver's Standings, then you can use the playseat...​

 

[ghskilla]

"Oh, hello, I was just explaining to my ex-team mate Felipe how I hold my trophies when I celebrate on the podium. See, this was as close as he could get to holding a trophy all season."​

 

[homeforsummer]

Alonso was unimpressed with the new decor in his lounge after the Ferrari special of Sixty Minute Makover.​

 

[Lizard]

Call *phone number* and YOU can speak to guru Fernando.

 

[funkyDucks]

The floor.....it's lava

 

[Pupik]

I wonder if they'd fire me I told them I can't stand red...

 

[Ferrari_458]

When I came to England and I saw people queueing
I told to myself: What the 🤬!?
All day, all night
All day, all night
So I called my friend Felipe
And I said to him: Felipe,
La gente esta muy loca,
What the 🤬!?

Source (Language Warning)​

 

[Touring Mars]

I'm not suggesting anything, I'm merely pointing out that 'Maldonado' means 'terrible accident' in Spanish​

 

[zed300]

"....and last but not least, to be a successful F1 driver, you must dominate teammate in all aspects."

"Ok Felippe put the camera down, and upload that to my blog then go and get me a cappuccino"
​

 

[niky]

...

D'oh. I just realized right now why everyone's been calling him "Bad Gift"...

 

[paskowitz]

Fernando coaching young aspiring drivers (In a Gandhi voice):
"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win. "

 

[Blaze_409]

"Look... I am faster than you.
now listen... I am faster than you.
but wait... I am faster than you.
and yeah... I am faster than you."

 

[DK]

FA: "So...let me get this straight...Felipe was faster than me?"
Random mechanic: "Please forgive me!"
FA: *laughs* "You're funny!"
The random mechanic retreats and finds new pants.

 

[Touring Mars]

ROUND NINE - RESULT

1st: prisonermonkeys - 25 pts
2nd: Touring Mars - 18 pts
3rd: GTP_Ingram - 15 pts
4th: niky - 12 pts
5th: zed300 - 10 pts
6th: PeterJB - 8 pts
7th: LewyOs - 6 pts

(Min. votes needed to score points this week: 2)

Winning Entry

"Hi, I'm Fernando Alonso, race driver for Scuderia Ferrari.

"You might not know this, but one of the biggest dangers to racing drivers today is Venezuelans. Sub-standard conditions and a lack of government support in Venezuela has lead to a situation where driving standards are at an all-time low. The government denies this, but statistically, Venezuelan drivers are the leading cause of retirements in Formula 1. And because of this, racing drivers are living in fear of an epidemic of 'El Passo Recklesso', an incurable disease that impairs a driver's spatial awareness, judgement and ability to admit he was wrong, and which is impervious to grid penalties, fines, reprimands and time penalties.

"But there is hope. For just a dollar a day, you can sponsor a Venezuelan driving instructor, and make sure he gets proper training and will raise driving standards to ensure that future generations of racing drivers have nothing to fear from Venezuelans. So please, give generously."

​

Standings (after Round Nine)

1st: prisonermonkeys - 113 pts ••
2nd: Touring Mars - 87 pts •
3rd: LewyOs - 76 pts •

4th: DK - 56 pts ••
5th: Flex0r - 50 pts •
6th: Famine - 45 pts •
7th: dhandes - 41 pts •
8th: Furinkazen - 36 pts •
9th: Stiggy - 29 pts
10th: RACECAR - 27 pts

11th=: GTP_Ingram, niky - 24 pts
13th=: chromatic9, Ferrari_458 - 23 pts
15th: gorsad - 22 pts
16th: Liquid - 21 pts
17th: zed300 - 20 pts
18th: akmuq - 18 pts
19th=: tribolik, Omnis - 17 pts
21st=: livemusic, funkyDucks - 16 pts
23rd: At 1ness - 15 pts
24th: FCB-Rizla-TML - 12 pts
25th: lemansfanatic - 11 pts
26th: BlacqueJacques - 10 pts
27th: Jimlaad43 - 9 pts
28th=: LMSCorvetteGT2, PeterJB - 8 pts
30th: haitch40 - 4 pts
31st=: Sach, pezzarinho17 - 3 pts
33rd=: Seismica, Turbo-Kai - 1 pt

Congratulations to prisonermonkeys for winning Round Nine, his second win of the season, and extending his lead at the top of the standings to boot

2012 Previous Round Winners

Round 1 - DK

Round 2 - Touring Mars

Round 3 - prisonermonkeys

Round 4 - Furinkazen

Round 5 - dhandes & DK

Round 6 - LewyOs

Round 7 - Flex0r

Round 8 - Famine

Round 9 - prisonermonkeys

Round Ten will follow shortly

​

 

[Jimlaad43]

Gah, no points again.

Rollon America, I always win at the new circuit.

 

[Touring Mars]

Pretty surprised that I got a podium this week - alot of funny entries, and loads of people voting too, both of which are great to see

prisonermonkeys is starting to do an Alonso on us though, and defending champ LewyOs is looking good too.

 

[gorsad]

No points, not surprised though, considering my entry wasn't that funny to begin with,

 

[Touring Mars]

Round Ten - Germany

Entries by Tuesday, 31st July - 1600 BST

Please mark your final entry appropriately, and remember that you cannot change it once it has been marked.

Please read the full rules available in Post #1 before entering.​

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Martin Whitmarsh: "Lewis, the FIA have looked at Red Bull's throttle maps, and they've decided that it's your fault."​

 

[Touring Mars]

"Well Lewis, there's good news and bad news... the good news is that Christian Horner has admitted to cheating. The bad news is that it was with your Mum."​

 

[ghskilla]

"The FIA have come to the conclusion that Vettel's move on Button was illegal and will now proceed to give you a 10 place grid penalty for Hungary and 20 seconds added to your original race distance."​

 

[funkyDucks]

Hello, Is this the AA?

 

[Pupik]

"So you'll install four new tires, check the wings, and inspect the sidepods...and do it in 30 minutes or less? You're hired!"

 

[niky]

Yes? Of course I'm interested in short-term high yield investments. Yes. The Nigerian Finance Ministry? Yes. Just half a million pounds? Do you accept credit? Here's my card number...

...

Yes. The name's Button, Jenson Button. Thank you very much.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that will be the end of it. I will not look for you. I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you."​

 

[Jimlaad43]

Hello, is that Charlie?
20 SECONDS, but he didn't give the position back!