Funny/Strange News Stories

[Famine]

He sounds like a "Freeman on the Land".

Don't look up these anuses if you wish to remain irritation-free.

 

[DK]

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why I never fly on Easyjet!

Other than the fact that it's crap and it's Britain's Ryanair?

 

[Lizard]

Man considered dead by the law when applying for a driving licence.

http://news.sky.com/story/1152982/ohio-man-still-legally-dead-despite-reappearing

 

[McLaren]

If the law considers him dead, I wonder what he can get away with. After all, how do you prosecute a man who's legally dead?

 

[Touring Mars]

Not so much 'funny' as bizarre - Bayer Leverkusen 'scored' a bizarre goal yesterday, after the ball hits the side netting but ends up in the back of the net... the player who 'scored' clearly reacts as if he has missed, but the goal is given anyway. The opponents, Hoffenheim, want the game to be replayed...

 

[Dennisch]

Well, Hawkeye won't help with that.

 

[ASH32]

Well, Hawkeye won't help with that.

No, if anything they'd have just said the computer says it's in so it must have been. This is up there with the ball boy goal and the foul penalty, I believe both those games were replayed.

 

[Carbonox]

So, umm, how about that goal line technology?

 

[tomhart9]

I'm pretty sure hawk eye can work out if it crosses the line outside of the posts, but I don't know if it just works on the line or the whole goal

 

[Barra333]

http://www.news.com.au/national-news/man-downs-90-cans-of-beer-gets-behind-wheel/story-fncynjr2-1226743811369

Wow. Both at managing to be alive after that much beer, and blowing 0.108 12hrs after finishing. Wonder what the reading would have been 15min after the last beer?

 

[DK]

And I thought Dion was bad!

 

[axletramp]

Dion's given up for a bit so this guy is just picking up the slack.

 

[Hayden]

A PUBLIC servant injured while having sex with an acquaintance at a motel while on a work trip was entitled to compensation, a judge has been told.

Original courier mail article

Old story but i'm posting this because today, the high court have overturned the compensation for the incident that happened six years back. Apparently having a light 'dislodged' onto your head while shagging somebody (unless your employer encourages that sorta thing) doesn't count as a workplace injury.

New ABC article

 

[lbsf1]

Woman gives letters to obese trick or treaters rather than sweets.

http://metro.co.uk/2013/10/30/overw...ne-woman-this-halloween-4167352/?ITO=facebook

 

[Furinkazen]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2509837/Teenager-went-drunken-night-Oldham-woke-PARIS.html

Errr.......

 

[DK]

Err...most of us don't want the Daily Wail to make ad money from us.

 

[Mikeybc]

Thought this was amusing.

http://fox2now.com/2013/11/21/oops-boeing-jet-lands-at-wrong-airport-now-it-cant-take-off/

 

[TB]

Thought this was amusing.

http://fox2now.com/2013/11/21/oops-boeing-jet-lands-at-wrong-airport-now-it-cant-take-off/

When fully loaded, the Dreamlifter needs a runway 9,199 feet long to take off, reports affiliate KWCH. The Jabara runway is 6,101 feet.

Perhaps I'm completely oversimplifying it, but can't they just unload it?

 

[Dennisch]

Perhaps I'm completely oversimplifying it, but can't they just unload it?

That was my first thought as well. Still would be funny if it can't take off even when it is empty.

 

[Famine]

9,200 feet is a pretty short take-off run - 747s usually run 10,000ft at maximum take-off weight - but they can do it in as little as 3,000ft. 6,100 feet is "a bit bloody short" for a hulk like that - but if it can take off at MTOW shorter than a 747 and it's burned off enough fuel on its first leg from New York to Kansas I can't see any particular reason it'd not be able to do it.

 

[AOS-]

edit: old news! Old me out of date! Sorry!

 

[Famine]

Oh not that one again. Didn't Snopes already debunk it like three years ago?

 

[AOS-]

I just found out it's old news. My apologies, I'm not connected with the world

 

[Pupik]

Perhaps I'm completely oversimplifying it, but can't they just unload it?

Why didn't they land in Wichita's Mid-Continent Airport as a diversion (i.e., not a mayday)?

 

[Mikeybc]

Why didn't they land in Wichita's Mid-Continent Airport as a diversion (i.e., not a mayday)?

From what I understand they were supposed to land at McConnell Air Force Base just 12 miles away and it was a mistake. Unless there is new reports it needed to make an emergency landing ?

Maybe possible to unload it and take off with minimal fuel ? Doesn't need to fly very far.

EDIT: Well the plane was able to take off, thanks partly to a 25 mph headwind and cool temperatures. They didn't need to unload it.

http://www.thenewstribune.com/2013/11/21/2905750/boeing-dreamlifter-makes-successful.html

 

[Dennisch]

The conversation between the pilot and the air traffic controller is fun.

"the airport is 12 miles to your south."

"Aaaw ****, I landed at the wrong airport."

 

[Touring Mars]

Should have gone to Specsavers...

 

[Famine]

As Amazon unveil plans to deliver packages to customers using autonomous drones, UK bookstore chain Waterstones responds... with OWLS.

 

[FoolKiller]

As Amazon unveil plans to deliver packages to customers using autonomous drones, UK bookstore chain Waterstones responds... with OWLS.

Drop the package off at the door, crap on the car, and eat your brand new puppy.

If I ever do get a message that my package is arriving and step outside to see a drone lower a box on to my property I could die a happy man, until one crashes into my car. Then it'll be back to complaining about it the way we do computers and smartphones, which should hold our primate brains in complete awe.

 

[Touring Mars]

Love the OWLS idea!

I think this drone thing could be turned on its head - not for Amazon perhaps, but for local shopping and take away food... You could pilot your own drone to the takeaway restaurant of your choice, fly it through their "fly-thru" zone where your takeaway is loaded onto it, and then you could fly it home - the days of paying 50% extra for a delivered pizza may be numbered!