Funny things RICErs say (radically immature car enthusiasts)

There's a car club in my college. I WAS in it, and kinda was meh about the whole club, until this happened.

So one day a couple of the members were looking at my bone stock Mazda6 (was a new 2015, don't really want to mess with those for the time being), and when I asked what was going on, one of the guys (Drives a super low, hellaflush Civic (mind you, this is the leader)) gave me a question.

"Ay yo man, why ain't you lowering this whip, man? Could look super sexy man!"

My answer:

"Severly lowering the car hinders handling and will take out my bumpers and worse, the oil pan. I really don't want that."

After each heard my answer to the question, the flames ignite.

Pointless banter occured, and amidst the ranting, the most memorable line that caught my ears was:

"Driving a stock car doesn't improve your driving experience on the road, man! Learn to take some hellaflush skills!"

What are "hellaflush skills"?

All I could respond with was "I'm sorry?" And he retorts with a "Race me bro! One on one, yo! If you walk away man, n****a you be a p***y!"

I drove off, for a good reason.

Like I would race in a speedtrap-infested area. Not risking that for a ticket.
Wow... Just wow...

Whatever age you are, in ten years you will be cringing at some of the awful things you did or said now.

It's just how it works, whenever you think you have your 🤬 together, it turns out that there's a whole world of other stuff for you to be ignorant and wrong about. It's great. :cheers:

I cringe at things I said last year! :lol:
 
IT HAPPENED AGAIN.

After my college classes, I'm going home in the Corolla(this is less common now, as I just bought a new daily driver I'll post later) and out of literally nowhere this dude rolls up in a BMW 3 series or something. It had a wide bodykit that I swear was cardboard and it had M badges on the fenders. It starts off friendly enough:
"Hey, nice car. It's clean too, I gotta respect the stock ones."
"Hey, thanks. I like this car a lot so I do what I can to take care of it."
"It's probably still slow as hell."
I just go with it.
"Yeah, these aren't fast, but that's not why I stuck with this car."
"I bet. A buddy had one of those and they can't even drift. Not like this."
"I didn't buy this car for drifting. Drifting's more or less a bonus with an 8-6. You may be going faster than me, but I'll be having more fun."
"That's what all the losers say."
Then he tried taking off with wheel spin, and when he took off I heard the funniest shriek from a guy I've heard in years. After that, two cool dudes in an Impreza WRX and some Mercedes said not to worry about that guy, and they said they liked my car too.

It's kinda odd how those are the only gearheads I've met so far in my year of being in college. Oh well, it was nice :)

He has a 3-series with a cardboard bodykit and he's talking smack about your car? *facepalm*
That guy didn't see the irony in what he was doing?
 
Fun fact- the Mazda6 has paddle shifters. I told my dad his racing experience will be much better. Therefore, the Civic loses
:lol:
The Civic has paddle shifters too.

Only difference is that the 6 has gears instead of a CVT.

And I actually prefer manual shifting with the shifter than the paddles on the 6, not because I don't have the grand touring trim (which has them), but mainly because it feels better that way in my opinion.
 
He has a 3-series with a cardboard bodykit and he's talking smack about your car? *facepalm*
That guy didn't see the irony in what he was doing?

They always do, that's the problem with buying a popular car lol. Lots of folk around my area get what I call "Europe syndrome"(the belief that if you watch Top Gear and own a european car, you're suddenly on par with F1 drivers. This is just my opinion, there's LOTS more cool dudes with european cars lol). So yeah that owner was prancing around thinking they have the best car in the world just because it has a BMW emblem in his case, while I just had a little Japanese drift box in his world.
 
They always do, that's the problem with buying a popular car lol. Lots of folk around my area get what I call "Europe syndrome"(the belief that if you watch Top Gear and own a european car, you're suddenly on par with F1 drivers. This is just my opinion, there's LOTS more cool dudes with european cars lol). So yeah that owner was prancing around thinking they have the best car in the world just because it has a BMW emblem in his case, while I just had a little Japanese drift box in his world.


In his world you have an 8-5.
 
What excuse does he give for leaving it on?

He doesn't have one. When I talk to him about it he just laughs then shrugs. But his car is all about show. $2000 rims, fat tires, loud exhaust, LED lighting everywhere and limo tint. He just wants attention, whether it be good or bad :lol:



Side story:
Couple weeks back we went to my cousin's 15th birthday. I showed up in my Trans Am and Mr. M7 showed up in his car with newly installed magnaflow catback which he claims makes his car sound like a "Ferrari". In stylish fashion he arrived late so that everyone could see him riding the limiter all the way down the street. Later as we're eating I jokingly asked the guy sitting next to my uncle if he saw that Ferrari that just passed by. My uncle tells me to shut up and that his car is louder than mine. Well I couldn't have any of that so we decided to settle it Top Gear style by setting off car alarms. Unfortunately we tied at 3 so we decided to let the birthday boy decide which was better. I won :D
 
My uncle tells me to shut up and that his car is louder than mine. Well I couldn't have any of that so we decided to settle it Top Gear style by setting off car alarms. Unfortunately we tied at 3 so we decided to let the birthday boy decide which was better. I won :D
Yup, this definitely belongs in this thread.
 
He doesn't have one. When I talk to him about it he just laughs then shrugs. But his car is all about show. $2000 rims, fat tires, loud exhaust, LED lighting everywhere and limo tint. He just wants attention, whether it be good or bad :lol:



Side story:
Couple weeks back we went to my cousin's 15th birthday. I showed up in my Trans Am and Mr. M7 showed up in his car with newly installed magnaflow catback which he claims makes his car sound like a "Ferrari". In stylish fashion he arrived late so that everyone could see him riding the limiter all the way down the street. Later as we're eating I jokingly asked the guy sitting next to my uncle if he saw that Ferrari that just passed by. My uncle tells me to shut up and that his car is louder than mine. Well I couldn't have any of that so we decided to settle it Top Gear style by setting off car alarms. Unfortunately we tied at 3 so we decided to let the birthday boy decide which was better. I won :D
Setting car alarms off is a great measure, and of course a muscle car will sound better than an aftermarket kit for a BMW...
 
I was at Cars and Coffee last month. I was looking at a Cadillac CTS-V wagon with the hood up when a man walked over, and stated that it was "the fastest car here". There was a 997 GT3 at the show, along with an SRT Viper and a C7 Corvette.

"Fast" when referring to a car is a term usually used only by people who don't know cars. It's too vague to use, it could mean the 0-60, the top speed or a lap time.
 
Just scroll down to the first comment you see in this youtube video and prepare to facepalm.


Yeah, I'm guessing the guy making that comment is a kid that doesn't know any better as he goes on to call the Saleen Mustang a "Ricer".
 
Just scroll down to the first comment you see in this youtube video and prepare to facepalm.


Yeah, I'm guessing the guy making that comment is a kid that doesn't know any better as he goes on to call the Saleen Mustang a "Ricer".


Well he sure started an all out war right there.
 
I'm actually reading the comment chain now still. He just continues to throw Mustang & Ford stereotypes and apparently thinks he needs to comment on Mustang videos to warn everyone of these "junk cars".

and he continues to reply to other comments in the video continuing his blind hatred.
 
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Around my university, there is a "Cambergang" and "Stancesociety" group on one corner of the parking lot. These guys have bashed on me before because I was in the college's Formula SAE team before.

They have a tendency to bash and hate on people who have a brand-new car (new or used, if they see someone with a temporary plate, they WILL bash on it).

A few days ago my GF got a 2010(?) Lexus GS460 for ~$10k (not a bad deal, I'd say) and parked right alongside me, and I unfortunately was parked 3-4 cars away from this group.

When we left to go to our cars at night, oh boy. They were right in front of our cars, waiting for us.

One of the guys (drives a lowered civic with a massive as 🤬 wing spoiler) immediately berates my GF and started calling her a "spoiled 🤬 who doesn't know how to drive."

The crap, dude? It's one thing to tell someone they are spoiled by looking at the car, but it's another thing if you just say they flat out suck at driving by looking at the car.

And he then started berating me for a slow driver (I drive at the speed limit around the area because every corner and straightaway is a speed trap).

"Yo man, for a racer, you is slow! How 'bout you take you and yo girl outta here, you have no place in this lot!"

"Uh, what?"

And later on, another member stepped up and said:
"Ay, you know what, why don't you two prove to us that you belong here by drifting, ay?"

Like these guys know about drifting.

So I decided to step up the plate and flat out say:

"Like you guys know how to drift."

One dude automatically ran out, went in his completely ruined S14 240SX and just shouted out,

"I'LL SHOW YOU GUYS HOW DRIFTIN'Z DUN"

And went full speed around the corner, annnnnd.....

.... Crashed straight into a tree.

The whole "crew" panicked and ran to check on the dude, and as for my GF and I, we just drove home.
On the way out of the street, several cops, a fire truck, and an ambulance came past by us.

I'm not gonna park there again.
 
I have to laugh about the story about the 11 year old kid and the Honda Civic. When I was 10-11 I'm not sure if I was still convinced and arguing with my dad that the real version of my Texaco Racing Sierra Cosworth toy car could do 300mph. Haha, perhaps I was a little younger, but yeah you can't blame an 11 year old for that. I also used to tell people when I was a kid that I was signed up to be a Benneton Formula 1 driver when I was older, just because I did a bit of Karting I thought I was the next Damon Hill.

When I was like 12-13 my dad got a Civic (1997, 1.6L Vtec thing) and I was convinced it was pretty much the baddest car around, I do actually remember it being pretty fast but I could be wrong. I used to think my Grandads early 90s MKIII Automatic Vauxhaul Cavilier was fast, he would hit the sport button on the gearstick and then hit the accelerator while grunting "Go-On"... I used to brag to my school friends about how fast that car was hah.
 
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