- 795
- BEMBEMBOWBOW
The Homosexuality Discussion Thread
- Thread starter Duke
- 9,138 comments
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- 9,262
- Corsham
- lipming
I'm bisexual, and obviously I have no problem with any kind of sexuality. And I have virtually no tolerance of prejudice based on sexuality, which can create tensions between me and my homophobic dad, though he isn't aware of my orientation. I have several friends which I am attracted to, and they've all said they're fine with it as long as I keep my hands to myself. Which surprised me, since I was expecting them to disown me, but the topic rarely comes up in conversation.
There are certain parts of homosexuality that I don't approve of though. For example, I don't believe gay adoption is good thing because I do not believe it is good for children to grow up in a household with two dads (or two mums). Also, I don't like gay people who dress and act either very flamboyantly and camp or lesbians who basically dress like men, mainly because I don't find it particularly attractive on men, and it just reinforces the stereotype. Plus, dressing like that is usually what can make them victimized as well.
There are certain parts of homosexuality that I don't approve of though. For example, I don't believe gay adoption is good thing because I do not believe it is good for children to grow up in a household with two dads (or two mums). Also, I don't like gay people who dress and act either very flamboyantly and camp or lesbians who basically dress like men, mainly because I don't find it particularly attractive on men, and it just reinforces the stereotype. Plus, dressing like that is usually what can make them victimized as well.
- 24,553
- Frankfort, KY
- GTP_FoolKiller
- FoolKiller1979
I am curious as to why? I mean, I know instances where a husband dies and the mother and child live with an aunt or grandmother, or something similar. I honestly feel that there is nothing in homosexual parenting that doesn't have a somewhat similar situation that can occur in heterosexual parenting. When a parent is a good parent I don't see how any family structure can be harmful. I feel that the key to raising a child has more to do with the type of parent than the structure of the parent combination.
I don't know if you all ever got the TV show Full House over there, but it was an 80's sitcom where three straight guys, due to circumstance, wound up living under the same roof raising three girls. One of the men was the biological father. Or the movies "Three Men and a Baby/Lady." I find it odd that in our culture it has been a situation for perceived levity in a heterosexual couple for decades but many people of varying sexual preferences see a real issue when it is a homosexual couple.
This I can understand, but I hate anyone who dresses or acts a certain way purely to announce who they are or what niche group they want to be considered to be a part of. See my constant rants about hipsters as an example.
- 685
- BigYoSpeck
I don't see the issue it's just peacocking. Do you take issue with guys like Russell Brand doing it or guys in rock bands? What about girls with their £80 hair style, face full of makeup, heels, dress and accessories?
A lot of people put just as much effort into looking vanilla as the flamboyant people put into standing out and it's for the same reasons of how they want to be represented to others.
- 9,262
- Corsham
- lipming
I haven't told him yet because I don't know how he'd react. He may be fine with it and realise their is nothing wrong with ones sexuality. But then again he has openly made death threats to various homosexuals in the media.
It's mainly because most of the childs peers will have a mum and a dad, so they may be victimized because of they don't have that. Plus, it doesn't see like a very traditional upbringing.
It's only when do it in such a way that is saying "Look at me I'm gay and proud of it" that I don't like. Not the pride part, more that they're trying to make such a spectacle of themselves based on their sexuality, when really, it doesn't look good, and as I said before, it just reinforces the stereotype.
- 24,553
- Frankfort, KY
- GTP_FoolKiller
- FoolKiller1979
But that is why I brought up the point of similar situations with heterosexual parents. Is it any less traditional or problematic for a similar situation in a heterosexual relationship? Bi-racial parents? I live in a state with a number of very racist communities, yet know of a number of bi-racial families, and even have two in my family. Do those create any less issues? Do you have problems with those as well?
See, I am trying to get to the heart of your problem. Do you see a problem with a similarly non-traditional situation as long as the parental figures are straight?
- 9,262
- Corsham
- lipming
It's not because the parents are the same sex, it's more because they are in a homosexual relationship, which isn't the case with living with a mother and aunt. A child will realise that their aunt or grandmother is not one of their parents, but very young children may look at their homosexual parents and see two dads (or mums), and may never see one parent as being the mother or father figure because in other families the mother is a woman, and the dad is a man.
The way I see it, if a gay couple live an area full of prejudice, or a society that is against gay adoption, and they decide to adopt, then they are choosing to bring up a child in society that may mock and victimize them for having gay parents, when it is commonly accepted to have intersex parents.
- 24,553
- Frankfort, KY
- GTP_FoolKiller
- FoolKiller1979
In the right region though your dislike should apply to interracial families, divorced parents, and yes, even single-parent homes. As the child of a divorced family I can assure you that at the time it happened there was a stigma, especially considering that my dad left my mom to live a promiscuos lifestyle. Running into schoolmates in public with my dad and his girlfriend of the week became uncomfortable.
In all honesty, I would find a divorced couple due to adultery more harmful than a homosexual set of parents overall. Heck, I can think of a lot of traditional family situations that are far less favorable than a child understanding having two mommies or daddies.
- 6,584
- Kent, UK
- GTP_Jondot
Your views might change on that front, I have to say. I was of the same opinion a year or two ago, and while I certainly wouldn't have condemned any such couple from adopting I personally couldn't face the idea of doing it myself, purely on the basis that I couldn't stand the idea of any child of mine coming up against friction at school or whatever because of my own sexuality. Now though, not so bothered. I've realised it'd be a bit like not having kids because your wife's got red hair and you don't want to introduce a possibly-ginger child into a world where they're discriminated against.
- 24,553
- Frankfort, KY
- GTP_FoolKiller
- FoolKiller1979
I should also add that I don't know enough about the foster system and orphanages in the UK (the best I have is Dickens), so I can't say what is the best for any child in any circumstance.
But I can say that a child being bullied in any form because they have loving parents of any make up is far better than a child left alone in the foster system.
But I can say that a child being bullied in any form because they have loving parents of any make up is far better than a child left alone in the foster system.
- 685
- BigYoSpeck
There is no recipe for the right family. All a child needs is love, protection, nurturing and teaching how to exist happily and productively in the world. There are so many 'traditional' family's that fail this I don't think it's at all fair to say that a same sex couple couldn't work or that the reasons they wouldn't work are any different than the reasons normal family's fail.
So the gay parents may be a target for bully's. Let's ban all fat, myopic, short, tall, ginger, intelligent, freckled and whatever else bullies target from having family's while we're at it. Surely the bully's once they have nothing other than a homogenised society, they will give up that game?
Parents are in the end such a limiting factor on who a person becomes. You spend far more of your life with teachers and peers, all you need from parents is stability and the fundamental care.
So the gay parents may be a target for bully's. Let's ban all fat, myopic, short, tall, ginger, intelligent, freckled and whatever else bullies target from having family's while we're at it. Surely the bully's once they have nothing other than a homogenised society, they will give up that game?
Parents are in the end such a limiting factor on who a person becomes. You spend far more of your life with teachers and peers, all you need from parents is stability and the fundamental care.
- 3,195
- tribolik
In a perfect world perhaps, but in our world it is better to have two dads or two mums than no dad at all.
There is a goverment institution here that takes care of orphans and we just found out that in the late 80s early 90s a lot of the kids where abused by a worker there and he also profit from pedofilia -bringing the kids to be abused by rich people.
So I think that its better if all children are intitled to having parents - Homosexual or not - as long as the are properly loved
- 743
- Los Angeles area, CA
...I don't understand the "bullying" argument, when it comes to raising children.
I'm teaching my daughter Muay Thai. =D She's got a good round kick, and a KILLER right elbow.
First kid dumb enough to pick on her has somethin' coming to them, and it's nothing nice. Heh. ^_^
Some kids come from a bad environment, and turn into little b@stards. They're the ones that turn into bullies. There's not much we can do about that.
However, we can teach our kids how to deal with those bullies. (Even though we might differ on the best approach to dealing with them.
)
I'm teaching my daughter Muay Thai. =D She's got a good round kick, and a KILLER right elbow.
First kid dumb enough to pick on her has somethin' coming to them, and it's nothing nice. Heh. ^_^
Some kids come from a bad environment, and turn into little b@stards. They're the ones that turn into bullies. There's not much we can do about that.
However, we can teach our kids how to deal with those bullies. (Even though we might differ on the best approach to dealing with them.
)
- 14,060
- Ireland
- driftking18594
- CiaranGTR94
My personal favourite is the "Rocky V" method. Only good thing about that movie.
- 333
Some how this remind me of "The Kids Are All Right" great movie. Although if the couple were man, it would had never be seen.
- 295
...I don't understand the "bullying" argument, when it comes to raising children.
I'm teaching my daughter Muay Thai. =D She's got a good round kick, and a KILLER right elbow.
First kid dumb enough to pick on her has somethin' coming to them, and it's nothing nice. Heh. ^_^
Some kids come from a bad environment, and turn into little b@stards. They're the ones that turn into bullies. There's not much we can do about that.
However, we can teach our kids how to deal with those bullies. (Even though we might differ on the best approach to dealing with them.
If I were you, I wouldn't place so much emphasis, conveying to your daughter, that Muay Thi is self defense. Make it more of a lifelong physical choice decision.
Reason I say this, is those reflexes you're teaching her will automatically kick-in should the need arise, at least you're not training her growing mind for battle, just her body-muscles & reflexes.
Going about it the other way, training her, or any child's mind for battle, they won't necessarily know when to impliment their skill-set, and as you know once "the cats out the bag" that's it, there's no putting it back. In this situation some kid may go for more drastic measures ie. guns, knives, piece of pipe, etc to attack your daughter when she is not aware.
So I suggest, taking the first approach I mentioned. Train her body, not her mind to battle. And suggest she be assertive about harassment being against the law and very much a punishable event, when confronted by bullies. Have her program 911 on speed-dial, if it isn't already. Basically, teaching her the diffussion method over the combative method.
This is just a suggestion.
- 3,033
bump
Morality from a Philosophical point is driven by logic today.
Consider individuals who are raised in a family of gypsies, they con other people, steal & live a life of crime. They dont feel uncomfortable about it because its all they've ever known. Does that mean its morally correct what they "feel" about it. Hell no, lol.
A kid raised in Africa who sees people naked everywhere isnt going to care, but a kid raised in the USA who sees naked people will feel uncomfortable.
Your "feeling" means absolutely nothing in relation to logic. Some feel like killing others, they feel their perfect, and invincible, vain, all powerful, specially important, voices speak to them. These things today have clinical names, narcissism, psychosis, psychopathy, schizophrenia etc. Their feelings aren't the truth, but an illusion.
Feeling uncomfortable around gays is an illusion giving off a false reality based on how one has been raised. There's no logical reasoning against being gay, other than it makes others illogically feel uncomfortable because they were taught that from a young age.
Morality from a Philosophical point is driven by logic today.
Consider individuals who are raised in a family of gypsies, they con other people, steal & live a life of crime. They dont feel uncomfortable about it because its all they've ever known. Does that mean its morally correct what they "feel" about it. Hell no, lol.
A kid raised in Africa who sees people naked everywhere isnt going to care, but a kid raised in the USA who sees naked people will feel uncomfortable.
Your "feeling" means absolutely nothing in relation to logic. Some feel like killing others, they feel their perfect, and invincible, vain, all powerful, specially important, voices speak to them. These things today have clinical names, narcissism, psychosis, psychopathy, schizophrenia etc. Their feelings aren't the truth, but an illusion.
Feeling uncomfortable around gays is an illusion giving off a false reality based on how one has been raised. There's no logical reasoning against being gay, other than it makes others illogically feel uncomfortable because they were taught that from a young age.
- 6,392
- Pennsylvania
- wat3rm370n
Hmmm, gypsy stereotyping is probably for another thread!
Ironically enough, many years ago (about 20), I knew a gay girl who got a new girlfriend with what could be considered an odd first name. I won't mention it specifically... but it was kind of like a Native American last name... descriptive words in English. When this friend told me her new girlfriend had that name because she was from a Gypsy family, I said the only thing I knew about gypsies was that I heard stories as a child about how after a big flood we had in our region, "gypsies came through & conned people".
This gay friend called me a prejudiced bigot for that. And that, I think is when I found out that Gypsies are actually an ethnic group!
And as it turns out, it IS a bigot stereotype.
Lots of people that were called Gypsies simply because they were criminal con artists, were not actually ethnic gypsies at all. And there are ethnic gypsies who do not actually live a life of crime. Many (if not most) are not even transient these days, at least in the US.
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TT3AZ
(Banned)
- 1,566
- tt3_az
- TT3AZ
Well, hard question, but this is how i think:
My political corectness says - Its their business, as long as its legal i have no problem...
My religious side - Its wrong, see what happened in sodom and gomorra
My personal opinion - Well, i keep that for myself.
My political corectness says - Its their business, as long as its legal i have no problem...
My religious side - Its wrong, see what happened in sodom and gomorra
My personal opinion - Well, i keep that for myself.
- 2,083
- FreedomWeasel
What's not fair is treating people differently for how they were born. Is it "not fair" that some people have darker skin than others? Or is it unfair that they are treated differently?
How is that different than anything else? Were you ever mocked or bullied as a kid? Off the top of my head I was mocked/bullied/teased for the following: My name, my hair, liking books, liking science, not liking football, liking soccer, liking hockey, liking bikes, not liking wrestling, not liking the right books, not going to church, where I lived, having too much money, not having enough money, etc, etc
Kids, strike that, people are mean, and will always find something to make fun of each other with.
I could also make the obvious reference to mixed-race couples and how they were not (and still sometimes are not) accepted.
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freedomweasel
No it is not fair that they are born in a society which does not usually share same interests as non-homosexual people. Race is TOTALLY different issue, so dont even relate to that. A community in Africa has people whose skins are dark, and there is nothing to feel different to be black, because 9/10 are born same way unless you are homosexual. So dont even try to relate it to racism. What are you, person from 70's? Racism did not disappear, but it is disappearing at an exponential speed, so it is not a good example. Homosexuals is not a race.
- 2,083
- FreedomWeasel
Uh.. what? Assuming someone is born homosexual, I'd say it's a fairly legitimate analogy. You are born the way you are. That's the way it goes. The "unfair" part is that people treat you poorly because of it.
I'm honestly dumbfounded by what you posted, and I don't even understand the latter 2/3s.
Dark skinned people are dark skinned because of their DNA as well, yet society doesn't treat them like crap (as often). Why should homosexuals be any different? How is it any "less fair" to be born homosexual than being born with red hair, or being born to short parents, or dark skinned, or with the DNA to be tall and lanky?
- 4,687
- Golden State
- xViLLaiNx12
I know a few homosexuals, I think they're great, and I'm happy for them. I love watching Modern Family and Cam is one of my favorite characters (but no one beats Phil, come on!). I don't have any problems with their prefences or lifestyle choices or how they were born. Whatever it is that makes them attracted to their own gender is irrelevant, the fact is: the are. So go for it. Go for what makes you happy as long as you don't hurt anyone in the process.
No with that said, I give you this. I can't :censored:ing stand it:
Homosexuality is not a brand. It is not an accessory. It's not a badge. It does not define you. You define you. I'm not defined as a person by being a heterosexual, so why should one's homosexuality define them? I hate that and I hate it in all of its foolishness. I know Perez Hilton is an extreme example, but he's also a perfect one. I've seen many a-holes like this and I wish I didn't. It boils my blood. There's nothing wrong with being gay, but there's nothing to brag about either.
//Please take this as me not having a problem with homosexuality. The problem is with morons like that making a mockery of a legitimate lifestyle. Absolutely ridiculous. 👎
No with that said, I give you this. I can't :censored:ing stand it:
Homosexuality is not a brand. It is not an accessory. It's not a badge. It does not define you. You define you. I'm not defined as a person by being a heterosexual, so why should one's homosexuality define them? I hate that and I hate it in all of its foolishness. I know Perez Hilton is an extreme example, but he's also a perfect one. I've seen many a-holes like this and I wish I didn't. It boils my blood. There's nothing wrong with being gay, but there's nothing to brag about either.
//Please take this as me not having a problem with homosexuality. The problem is with morons like that making a mockery of a legitimate lifestyle. Absolutely ridiculous. 👎
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