I agree with
@sems4arsenal about the exclusives. You seem like your not overly considering one over the other, so I would say check out what exclusives you might like more, to help out with your decision
About the post itself though, both systems are having great deals with their premium memberships. Although from what I heard(havnt looked this up in some time, so if I'm wrong please forgive me) you have to keep the PS+ if you want to play the games that are offered for free with it, while on the XBL you keep the games regardless of your accounts membership.
However, with the Xbox One being so new, the games offered for free right now are not the cream of the crop. I'm not sure whats being offered on PS+ though, maybe someone can fill you in here.
The PS4 selling more should not be considered as a reason to buy something over the other. While it did sell more, that does not mean that there is a lack of players on the X1. I have no problem getting on and playing at any time of the day.
If your all about specs, then the PS4 would be the obvious choice. IMO, both consoles are so great that it wasn't a factor for me.
There are simple things on the Xbox that actually made me choose it over the other:
-The party system, even since the 360, was a feature that made all the difference in the world to me. Trying to navigate games like the original Grid on the PS3 was such a pain, so much so that my friends and I had to set up a three way call just so we can find out who's in what room.
-The controller as you mentioned. They layout was always easier for me, and allowed for long periods of gameplay without cramps. This new controller is a step up as well, but the bumpers seem a bit odd and farther up than I remember.
-I personally also had a better connection with my XBL service, rather then the PS service. However, that can be subjective and probably varies from person to person.
Another Note.. I've never cared for the Kinect, in fact I almost bought it without it but made a last minute decision to get it. I'm glad I did as the voice commands come in handy, especially when me and my gf are in bed and we're to lazy to even move to change a movie or play the next episode.