The Book of Turismo

[bass264]

apex to that ^^

lol

 

[MustangCobra95]

The Gran Turismo Creed

I believe in one God
the Yamauchi almighty
maker of the GT series,
of all things GTR and Miata.

I believe in one Kazunori
the only begotten son of God
born of the Father before all ages.
Car from Car, Paint from Paint,
true Bob from true Bob,
begotten, not made, consubstantial with the Father;
through him all things were made.
For us racers and our salvation
he came down from Heaven,
and by Sony Computer Entertainment,
created Polyphony Digital,
and became awesome.

For our sake he was controlled by SCE
he suffered deadlines and was pissed
but released Spec 2.0 and DLC
in accordance with the fanbase.
He went off to the Nurburgring
and is seated at the wheel of an X2010.
He will come one day in glory
to judge the loyal and those who left
and his kingdom will have no end.

I believe in the physics engine, the Lord, the giver of life,
who proceeds from Kaz and his team,
who with Kaz and PD is adored and glorified,
who has spoken through the players.

I believe in one holy, wonderful and lovable series.
I confess one account for the forgiveness of duping
and I look forward to resurrection of GT5
and the life of GT to come. Amen.

You win.

 

[Doog]

Thou shalt accept the almighty Mini as their lord.

 

[MOTORTRENDmitch]

Though shall NEVER Put a racing exhaust on a ZR1.

 

[Doog]

Though shall NEVER Put a racing exhaust on a ZR1.

 

[HippieGiraffe]

Thou shalt drink petrol and eat Michelin's until thy becomes one with thine car.

 

[CorvetteConquer]

Thou shall disable TCS and race like a real man/woman!

Thou shall not place a wing on a classic car simply because thou art able to.

 

[xX2Fast_4_YouXx]

The Gran Turismo Creed

I believe in one God
the Yamauchi almighty
maker of the GT series,
of all things GTR and Miata.

I believe in one Kazunori
the only begotten son of God
born of the Father before all ages.
Car from Car, Paint from Paint,
true Bob from true Bob,
begotten, not made, consubstantial with the Father;
through him all things were made.
For us racers and our salvation
he came down from Heaven,
and by Sony Computer Entertainment,
created Polyphony Digital,
and became awesome.

For our sake he was controlled by SCE
he suffered deadlines and was pissed
but released Spec 2.0 and DLC
in accordance with the fanbase.
He went off to the Nurburgring
and is seated at the wheel of an X2010.
He will come one day in glory
to judge the loyal and those who left
and his kingdom will have no end.

I believe in the physics engine, the Lord, the giver of life,
who proceeds from Kaz and his team,
who with Kaz and PD is adored and glorified,
who has spoken through the players.

I believe in one holy, wonderful and lovable series.
I confess one account for the forgiveness of duping
and I look forward to resurrection of GT5
and the life of GT to come. Amen.​

 

[Schwartz]

Thou shall not place a wing on a classic car simply because thou art able to.

Agreed 👍

 

[Giygas]

Thou shall not paint thine zonda r chrome.

 

[W3H5]

Our Diver, which art in Asphalt,
Hallowed be thy V12.
Thy Turbo come.
Thy will be done in Sarthe,
As it is in Nürburg.
Give us this day our daily fuel.
And forgive us our tyre wear,
As we forgive them that trade paint against us.
And lead us not into blocking,
But deliver us from the Gravel.
For thine is the Piston,

The power, and the traction,

For ever and ever.

Apex.​

 

[blah blah blah]

^^^LOL!!!!

Thou shalt not sing while wearing thy headset

 

[isildur]

Thou shall play with your midget at least once a day....

 

[Thebeast2011]

I'm a catholic and I find this a bit offensive

 

[W3H5]

I'm a catholic and I find this a bit offensive

I don't think anyone has posted here with the intention of offending anyone. Admittedly most of the posts in this thread are biblical line rewritten with automotive word inserted.

It's just a light hearted bit of fun but if you feel that someone has over stepped the mark and is truly showing offences towards a group of people you would be well within your power to report them as it would conflict with the AUP.

Do take into consideration that a lot of people posting here are also the same faith as you and yet understand that it is just a bit of fun.

 

[isildur]

I don't think anyone has posted here with the intention of offending anyone. Admittedly most of the posts in this thread are biblical line rewritten with automotive word inserted.

It's just a light hearted bit of fun but if you feel that someone has over stepped the mark and is truly showing offences towards a group of people you would be well within your power to report them as it would conflict with the AUP.

Do take into consideration that a lot of people posting here are also the same faith as you and yet understand that it is just a bit of fun.

I agree and I am catholic too....

 

[leepangfu]

Thou shall know the Almighty will never let your car stop running when it runs out of fuel.

 

[cby82]

^Best one so far

i concur!👍

 

[cby82]

I'm a catholic and I find this a bit offensive

Some little facetious & condescending a$$ma$ter TOTALLY did NOT get my point of view in a previous post & proceeded to belittle & talk down at me. He DARED to even call me SON when I can school his little punk a$$ & make him learn some manners. But I didn't even bother wasting my time. For I know, what goes around comes around. Ergo, tis a good idea to let it be. Thus, no need to feel offended. I'm sure even God has a sense of humour.

 

[Grayfox]

Thou shalt sacrifice thine exploded parts to the God of Speed(Kaz) for forgiveness from willful and neglegent destruction of His Children.

Thou shall not make fun of fastest 1000cc motorbike.

 

[Ronald6]

Our Diver, which art in Asphalt,
Hallowed be thy V12.
Thy Turbo come.
Thy will be done in Sarthe,
As it is in Nürburg.
Give us this day our daily fuel.
And forgive us our tyre wear,
As we forgive them that trade paint against us.
And lead us not into blocking,
But deliver us from the Gravel.
For thine is the Piston,

The power, and the traction,

For ever and ever.

Apex.

Does Fathead make custom posters?

 

[tikm]

Thou shall wait on the lord Yamauchi for his wisdom does not fade away

 

[Jar31Lar]

I'm a catholic and I find this a bit offensive

Hey pal, I'm Catholic too. Went to this year's NCYC and everything

 

[turbolefty78]

Thou shall not make fun of fastest 1000cc motorbike.

No offence intended towards the venerable Mr. Burt Munro or his Indian. Indeed, his story, bike and the movie are amongst my favorites of all time. The photo seemed to fit the post rather nicely at the time.

 

[Grayfox]

No offence intended towards the venerable Mr. Burt Munro or his Indian. Indeed, his story, bike and the movie are amongst my favorites of all time. The photo seemed to fit the post rather nicely at the time.

I should have said "MotorCecall' just like old bert siad it in the movie.

 

[occasionalracer]

I'm a catholic and I find this a bit offensive

Having an internet connection is the last thing you want then... there is far worse information looming around you my friend.

I really cracked up reading shems GT prayer....

 

[Schwartz]

I posted this in the OP, but only one person has replied to it so far:

It seems like this thread is turning into sort of a GT5 bible, held sacred by the followers of the (insert funny/creative name for GT5 religion here). Seriously, someone come up with a name now.

 

[noisiaturismo]

I posted this in the OP, but only one person has replied to it so far:

It seems like this thread is turning into sort of a GT5 bible, held sacred by the followers of the (insert funny/creative name for GT5 religion here). Seriously, someone come up with a name now.

Apex.

 

[noisiaturismo]

...and Polyphony Digital said:

''Take this 100 liter tank for all cars. Its my easy fueltank.''

And he broke it, but delayed giving it.

''Take this racing soft and superfuel mix. Its my easy fuel.''

But he delayed the Thursday, and Easter was replaced by Racing.

 

[AlphaAndius]

I really cracked up reading shems GT prayer....

That makes 2 of us. XD