The Homosexuality Discussion Thread

[Daniel]

... and they are always super (thanks for asking).

I read that very flamboyantly in my head

 

[Johnnypenso]

It is not "all" because of bigots. Depression is far more complex than this. No one hurts themselves or wants to kill themselves just because others dislike them. These are signs of a self-image problem, bullies just reinforce it. That is why no amount of hate or bullying seems to affect openly proud homosexuals and they are always super (thanks for asking). Until you learn this you will never be able to truly help your friend. You can be angry at people who speak out of ignorance (infected? Really? Is that the new thing now?) all you want and even beat each of them to death, but it will never make her feel better s out herself.


I suspect this is a larger part of her problem. Her entire upbringing was an a religion based on guilt and that homosexuals are going to Hell. Until she can realize that she is not wrong or guilty and that her family and church are the ones that are wrong she won't be able to love herself.

And if she keeps calling you before doing something and hesitating long enough for you to get there she is just crying for help. And keep in mind that she risks putting you in legal trouble and possible endangering you, your grandmother, and others by having someone without proper driving training (GT does not count) drive to her house in a fast manner.


There is a difference. The N-word was created as a degrading term. Gay was not. Gay, queer, and faggot all have alternate, legitimate meanings. In the case of gay and queer they do have roots in meaning overly/strangely happy (flamboyant) or weird/odd. They were used very similarly before society recognized homosexuality as something all around us. You should be fighting that gay and queer no longer refer to homosexuals, as that is historically calling them weird.

Maybe next time you hear someone say, "That's gay" you could just respond with, "That is weird."

And while we're in the topic of using words in an offensive manner, can we please only use homophobia to describe a legitimate uncontrollable psychological
fear of homosexuals? Calling every bigotry a homophobe is insulting to people with a psychological disorder. Some people may even be confused and uncomfortable around homosexuals because they are unable to understand it, but defend their equal rights. And some mean bigots may not be afraid at all.

Well said, but the N-word was not created as a degrading word at all. It has it's origins in Latin and Spanish as meaning simply "black" referring to the colour of one's skin of course. It turned into something more obviously but at it's origin it simply refers to skin colour.

 

[Rotary Junkie]

I don't have a problem with homosexuality but I use homophobic slurs. I use "That's gay" relatively often and call people faggots quite often. Things I call gay while using it as a derogatory term very rarely have anything at all to do with homosexuality, same goes for the actions/behavior that result in me calling someone a faggot.

I dunno, somewhere along the line the meaning has changed thanks to how the words now get used.

Kinda like the N-word in fact. The -a variation generally doesn't have a negative connotation and is used more to just refer to a person. In fact... Yeah, I use that one too in general conversation with people who use it themselves.

So either I'm a homophobic racist bastard and don't realize it or I just don't care and pick up speech habits too easily. I dunno.

 

[Johnnypenso]

I don't have a problem with homosexuality but I use homophobic slurs. I use "That's gay" relatively often and call people faggots quite often. Things I call gay while using it as a derogatory term very rarely have anything at all to do with homosexuality, same goes for the actions/behavior that result in me calling someone a faggot.

I dunno, somewhere along the line the meaning has changed thanks to how the words now get used.

Kinda like the N-word in fact. The -a variation generally doesn't have a negative connotation and is used more to just refer to a person. In fact... Yeah, I use that one too in general conversation with people who use it themselves.

So either I'm a homophobic racist bastard and don't realize it or I just don't care and pick up speech habits too easily. I dunno.

Words only have the power that we give to them. Anyone who has successfully raised kids should know, the more a parent reacts to something, the more the kid learns how to get a reaction out of his parent. Kid acts out...kid gets attention becomes kid wants attention...kid acts out.

To take the power out of certain words, ignore them. It works with adults as well as children. All you have to do is follow any number of threads on GTPlanet and watch people just leap in when the slightest insult his hurled or a certain stance taken, and that's just what the person doing the supposed offending wants. If you ignored them, they'd just go away.

 

[Gonales]

Since then, I've done everything I can to make her happy. She loves me like I'm a family member. But the thing is, if people didn't judge her for this one thing, she would've never needed me to be there. And while it makes me happy to think that I've saved her life in a way, I'd give away all the happiness I've gotten from being here for her if those people would just accept her for the amazing girl she is instead.

Open your eyes people.

Thanks a lot for the kind words, seems you are one of the only people capable of such a thing.

1). Yes, it sucks and it's unfortunate that fag has become an insult. People should think about it a little more and try to stop saying it so much.

Which is the only damn thing I asked isn't it?

2) If it really does bother you as much as you seem to be implying, that might be the only way to deal with it. I delete anyone on FB that repeatedly says things I find annoying.

Which is what I try to do as well. But you know... Why should I change things because other people lack decency?

3) If everyone was so concerned with not hurting people's feelings, you wouldn't be able to be on this forum and be open about your sexuality. Not very long ago even acknowledging the mere existence of homosexuality was offensive and would enrage people. I get what you're saying, it's not tactful to run around offending people on purpose, but it's an unfortunate part of life (there's also that a lot of social progress is inherently offensive to some). Put your big boy or big girl pants on and move on.

I'm sorry, but I am who I am, and I'm not lying about it because other people are homophobes and might be offended by my sexuality. I was born this way and can't help it, they however, can.

Oh, right. My hurt feelings aren't as hurt as your hurt feelings. I did have a hard time in elementary school growing up as the fat kid, and it did suck. But you know what? I put it in perspective, and hardened the hell up. There's people in this world who are insecure about themselves, and use insulting others as a way to make up for these deficiencies. Look at it from this angle and it becomes easier to just ignore these people.

People will laugh at you, fine. So will they at gay people. But fat people don't get disinherited, or kicked out of families because of who they are, right?

Appropriate song for the topic.👍

I wanna start a movement to make Gay mean happy again in the larger English narrative.

So many times I heard fellow classmates say that exam is "gay" just because they didn't like it.

I've yet to figure out how an exam will make me like men more...

You won't be able to. Changing again what gay means changing the way gay people defined themselves. That's like saying to a black person that he can't say he is black.

I don't have a problem with homosexuality but I use homophobic slurs. I use "That's gay" relatively often and call people faggots quite often. Things I call gay while using it as a derogatory term very rarely have anything at all to do with homosexuality, same goes for the actions/behavior that result in me calling someone a faggot.

I dunno, somewhere along the line the meaning has changed thanks to how the words now get used.

Kinda like the N-word in fact. The -a variation generally doesn't have a negative connotation and is used more to just refer to a person. In fact... Yeah, I use that one too in general conversation with people who use it themselves.

So either I'm a homophobic racist bastard and don't realize it or I just don't care and pick up speech habits too easily. I dunno.

The N word used to be offensive, and racist. But got banned from usage, if I'm correct. Which is the opposite of gay, which was not offensive in any way, and people started using it in the wrong way. The fact that YOU as well use it in the wrong way makes me disrespect you, so be aware that what you say can be heard by people like me as well.

To take the power out of certain words, ignore them. It works with adults as well as children. All you have to do is follow any number of threads on GTPlanet and watch people just leap in when the slightest insult his hurled or a certain stance taken, and that's just what the person doing the supposed offending wants. If you ignored them, they'd just go away.

Can you stop breathing? Or avoid oxygen? Whenever you play online, I will bet you that within the hour you hear the word gay used in the wrong way at least once. If that goes on for weeks, yes it gets real, really annoying. And I'm not going to keep my feelings to myself anymore because people like saying a specific word too much.

 

[homeforsummer]

But fat people don't get disinherited, or kicked out of families because of who they are, right?

That's just because they can't fit through the door.

 

[Danny]

You're not helping!

 

[Joel]

That's just because they can't fit through the door.

Reported.

 

[Famine]

The N word used to be offensive, and racist. But got banned from usage, if I'm correct. Which is the opposite of gay, which was not offensive in any way, and people started using it in the wrong way.

You're not. It is in fact exactly the same as words like "gay" and "fag".

It was derived from earlier words of Latin root that just meant "black" - negro in particular. It was shortened to a diminutive. It was used as an entirely off-the-cuff term to mean "black people" through the whole of society - it even appeared in the title of an Agatha Christie book.

Then it became used as a derogatory term. And it's not "banned" because there's no such thing as a banned word (hurrah! Freedom of speech!). It's used in films and comedy sketches all the time.

 

[Rotary Junkie]

The N word used to be offensive, and racist. But got banned from usage, if I'm correct.

Trust me, it didn't get banned. I remember something about it getting "banned" but it's somewhat difficult to ban words. It's still highly offensive and racist when using the -er variant, and highly offensive and racist for any variant to come from anyone not-black (such as myself)... Unless the people it's being directed towards know you and know your usage of it isn't meant as such. Suddenly it's okay.

Which is the opposite of gay, which was not offensive in any way, and people started using it in the wrong way. The fact that YOU as well use it in the wrong way makes me disrespect you, so be aware that what you say can be heard by people like me as well.

Oh no, someone on the internet doesn't respect me! WHAT IN THE WORLD WILL I DO?!?!? I wind up using "that's gay" in about the same context as "that sucks" or "that's bull:censored:"... And call people faggots for being general idiots. I don't care about political correctness and tend to be extremely abrasive towards everyone. In this case, yeah, I'm using both words in the "wrong" way, but considering their implication of homosexuality is, in and of itself, using them wrong... Why the hell does it offend you that I use them as negative terms aimed at people regardless of their orientation?

 

[Denur]

... And call people fagots for being general idiots.

And that is the problem the way I perceive it. If you do that, than it seems as if being gay implies being an idiot. (granted, some gays are idiots)

 

[KinLM]

Why the hell does it offend you that I use them as negative terms aimed at people regardless of their orientation?

That's the whole problem. People who are gay find it disrespectful that you use the word which describes their sexual preference to mean something which you don't like or something stupid, it's as if you're saying that the entire subject of gay and being gay is stupid and lame, and they don't like that.

It really doesn't matter, it obviously offends many gay people and for that reason, if you had any respect for their wishes then you wouldn't do it.

 

[Rotary Junkie]

And that is the problem the way I perceive it. If you do that, than it seems as if being gay implies being an idiot. (granted, some gays are idiots)

Only because you're still linking the word to homosexuality.

Edit: @KinLM: It's unfortunate then that I really don't care about anyone I don't know's wishes. They can all go and get offended, I really have no reason to care.

 

[FoolKiller]

Which is the only damn thing I asked isn't it?

Before or after you suggested freedom of speech (aka rights) be limited and you think Mitt Romney should be considered a criminal worthy of severe punishments?

Which is what I try to do as well. But you know... Why should I change things because other people lack decency?

Why should you remove FB friends who can't respect you after you request they not use language that is offensive? Why should you avoid hanging around people like that?

Maybe because you find them offensive? Sure, in a classroom or work setting you can't avoid them (although I'd bet they have rules about that sort of thing) but for people you choose to interact with, you become as much to blame for your personal offense because you know what you are walking into.

It should also be noted, that while people do not agree with your opinion on hate speech laws no one here has used the language you said you find offensive. And I have a feeling they wouldn't be allowed to remain here long if they did.

I'm sorry, but I am who I am, and I'm not lying about it because other people are homophobes and might be offended by my sexuality. I was born this way and can't help it, they however, can.

If they are actually homophobes, then no they can't. But then you aren't concerned about offending people with actual phobias (a psychological disorder) by equating them to bigots, are you?

Or maybe you know a claustrophobe who starts calling tight spaces offensive names.

It should probably also be noted that someone who says, "that's gay" may not be a bigot at all and just said a commonly used phrase without thinking first, and may accidentally say it from habit even after you ask them not to.

People will laugh at you, fine. So will they at gay people. But fat people don't get disinherited, or kicked out of families because of who they are, right?

I know of all kinds of reasons people have been disinherited. I have a friend who has rich parents. For his wedding they bought him a house. but his wife must stay home and raise the kids because no woman in their family ever worked. If they don't agree they are completely cut off.

Or there is the girl that broke up with me because her rich father found out I had a medical condition and told her I was a "bad investment" and wouldn't pay for her graduate school if she was still with me when she graduated.

Or my dad's family who haven't spoken to his cousin in 30+ years because she married a black man. I went through school sitting next to my black cousin and had no clue until I was 16.

Just from what I have personally witnessed (and yes, I know homosexuals who have been cut off too) I can easily see someone gaining too much weight being tossed aside by their family. Sometimes the cruelest people you know can be family.


Not that I know what any of this has to do with you wishing people would stop saying things like, "that's gay." It's not as if that would make your family issues go away, or even improve them. I mean, racist jokes are heavily frowned upon but racism is still an issue. If people didn't use callous, off-the-cuff remarks it wouldn't suddenly make non-understanding parents understand.

The N word used to be offensive, and racist. But got banned from usage, if I'm correct.

Incorrect. It is not banned. At least not here. Google the new movie Django Unchained if you don't believe me. It's actually had some controversy over the number of times they use the word.

Can you stop breathing? Or avoid oxygen? Whenever you play online, I will bet you that within the hour you hear the word gay used in the wrong way at least once.

While I can't stop breathing I can stop playing online or report people or add them to my ignore list, or only play with people I know personally. In fact, I have specific rules about playing with people that aren't within slapping distance.

 

[Famine]

Or maybe you know a claustrophobe who starts calling tight spaces offensive names.

OMG dude, that's so cramp.

 

[KinLM]

Only because you're still linking the word to homosexuality.

So what do you want to do? Make the word synonymous with stupidity, and force gay people and the rest of the world to use "homosexual" instead, all because you're too lazy and careless to simply use other terms instead?

 

[FoolKiller]

OMG dude, that's so cramp.

We need to find a way to make this the new slang.

We'd be heroes to the homosexual and mentally challenged (disabled? What's the new term now?) communities.

 

[Rotary Junkie]

So what do you want to do? Make the word synonymous with stupidity, and force gay people and the rest of the world to use "homosexual" instead, all because you're too lazy and careless to simply use other terms instead?

No, what I want is people to stop getting butthurt over the fact that homosexuality is a thing and stop thinking it's bad in some way when there's really no issue with it. I also want people to stop making a big deal out of race.

Of course, that isn't going to happen. But me changing the way I speak to avoid offending a rather small minority of people who I have no malice towards is also not going to happen.

 

[KinLM]

Sorry misread your previous post.

 

[sumbrownkid]

OMG dude, that's so cramp.

We need to find a way to make this the new slang.

We'd be heroes to the homosexual and mentally challenged (disabled? What's the new term now?) communities.

You guys are so cramped.

No, what I want is people to stop getting butthurt over the fact that homosexuality is a thing and stop thinking it's bad in some way when there's really no issue with it. I also want people to stop making a big deal out of race.

Of course, that isn't going to happen. But me changing the way I speak to avoid offending a rather small minority of people who I have no malice towards is also not going to happen.

Exactly this.👍 You know how many times I've been called terrorist by friends but yet didn't draw a fuss about it? Words hurt only if you let them hurt.

 

[Famine]

Exactly this.👍 You know how many times I've been called terrorist by friends but yet didn't draw a fuss about it? Words hurt only if you let them hurt.

Yeah, but since when have terrorists been kicked out of their home and disinherited?

 

[sumbrownkid]

Yeah, but since when have terrorists been kicked out of their home and disinherited?

Osama bin Laden.

But rumors persist that some members of the Bin Laden clan have supplied him with cash secretly for years.

But that's besides the point, he actually was "officially" cut off from the family inheritance.

 

[Famine]

Damn. Knew I should have used some [sarcasm] tags in that post somewhere.

 

[sumbrownkid]

Yeah I knew you meant sarcasm, but Bin Laden popped into my head as soon as I read that.

But it reflects on FoolKiller saying people get disinherited for many reasons, be it both benign and malignant, stupid and smart.

I remember a kid from my highschool who got disinherited because he went with the Army instead of going straight to the University that his parents' desired.

That kid though survived Afghanistan and Iraq, and is now studying to become a doctor.

 

[Dennisch]

Ah yes, the pope is being a dumbass as usual.

Pope Benedict XVI denounces gay marriage in his Christmas message saying 'manipulation of nature' will put future of mankind at stake.

The Pope has pressed his opposition to gay marriage today saying the future of mankind is at stake.
Pope Benedict XVI denounced what he described as people manipulating their God-given identities to suit their sexual choices - and destroying the very 'essence of the human creature' in the process.
He made the comments in his annual Christmas address to the Vatican bureaucracy, one of his most important speeches of the year.



Welcome to the Dark Ages!

 

[sumbrownkid]

It's the Pope saying Pope things. The Catholic Church is not one to amend its ways so readily.

I mean this is the same organization that jailed Galileo because of his heliocentric theory.

 

[homeforsummer]

Pfft, the Pope. What the hell does he have to do with Christmas?

 

[Dennisch]

And with ideas like that, he is nothing more than a dumbass. He gets all his "wisdom" out of an old book. He should start using science as a base of wisdom. People like him are the reason Gonales gets treated the way she is treated. By throwing pure ignorance into the airwaves.

 

[sumbrownkid]

And with ideas like that, he is nothing more than a dumbass. He gets all his "wisdom" out of an old book. He should start using science as a base of wisdom. People like him are the reason Gonales gets treated the way she is treated. By throwing pure ignorance into the airwaves.

But the sad fact is they forgetting the basic philosophy of Jesus: To forgive and to love. Judgement is ultimately God's call, not anybody, not even a Pope.

Why isn't the Pope saying that as well? Why are people who don the cross and yell at gays/lesbians forgetting that?

 

[Dennisch]

But the sad fact is they forgetting the basic philosophy of Jesus: To forgive and to love.

Why isn't the Pope saying that as well? Why are people who don the cross and yell at gays/lesbians forgetting that?

Indoctrination.