- 86,241
- Rule 12
- GTP_Famine
And so, on the eight-and-twentieth day, of the tenth month, of the year two thousand and six, UKGTP6 did come to pass...
For once I was actually early - beating all but the caretaker and our wondrous host EXelero to the venue. Though I did have an excuse - the IDTV-of-doom was catching a cold and needed an hour to warm up before it turned itself on. It was plugged in at 9.20am, so should be ready by the time the network was up and running and the racers were oiled and raring to go.
In theory.
EXelero and the caretaker's stepladder - his real ladder left him when he was 6.
It didn't take long for the rest of the dregs to arrive, fashionably late despite staying in a hotel just 100 yards away. And lo, we had an event.
The LAN logged itself in with the minimum of fuss, unlike last time and, just an hour behind schedule, we started racing. With the IDTV-of-doom still warming itself up.
Ashley., Specialized, donbenni, TheCracker, Roo and Touring Mars
Series 1 - Coupe Handicap
As before, a number of coupes (or at the least 2 door cars) listed from fastest to slowest. All drivers start off level, in the fastest car and, as they succeed, they move down the list to progressively slower cars. The ultimate winner of the series is the first driver to win a race in the slowest car on the list.
In order to extend the handicap idea a little further, and to allow for the numbers, the winner of any race would advance two cars, with 2nd and 3rd placed man advancing one, and all three miss the next race.
With 9 attendees, the three top-ranked drivers from the previous event sat out the first race - VEXD, Famine and daan.
Race 1 - Autumn Ring
1st Roo (Ruf RGT)
2nd Touring Mars (Ruf RGT)
3rd Specialized (Ruf RGT)
4th donbenni (Ruf RGT)
5th TheCracker (Ruf RGT)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
Roo breaks the ice on the weekend, taking race 1 and advancing down two cars to the Ruf 3400S. Mars and Specialized move on to the BMW M3 CSL. donbenni, TheCracker and Ashley. stay on for a second attempt in the ass-engined missile.
donbenni - the picture of concentration
TheCracker takes the Ruf route to the top
Race 2 - Suzuka
1st Famine (Ruf RGT)
2nd VEXD (Ruf RGT)
3rd TheCracker (Ruf RGT)
4th donbenni (Ruf RGT)
5th daan (Ruf RGT)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
Famine and VEXD live up to their rankings by taking the Rufs to 1st and 2nd - VEXD managing a complete 360 through 130R while pushing hard (too hard, as it turns out). TheCracker leapfrogs donbenni for the third spot, and a crack in the M3.
Race 3 - SS Route 5 Reverse
1st daan (Ruf RGT)
2nd Touring Mars (BMW M3 CSL)
3rd donbenni (Ruf RGT)
4th Specialized (BMW M3 CSL)
5th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
daan hooks up his Ruf at the second time of asking, with donbenni guiding a second one into third slot. Mars performs above his car, taking it to second. Roo struggles in the weakest car, with Ashley. not having much luck with the RGT.
At this point in the proceedings, Race Idiot turned up - very fashionably late. But of course the beauty of the handicap is that any driver can turn up at virtually any point and jump into the top car, working their way down the system like everybody else...
Of course, we need to address the issue of there being 10 drivers with only 3 sitting out each race... The solution is to have 4th place sitting out a race, though not progressing a car. 5th and 6th obviously need the positive effect of the handicap more, so making them sit out works against the ethos of the handicap.
Unfortunately for Specialized...
Race 4 - El Capitan
1st VEXD (BMW M3 CSL)
2nd Famine (Ruf 3400S)
3rd TheCracker (BMW M3 CSL)
4th Race Idiot (Ruf RGT)
5th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
The two fastest cars ended up off the podium, with VEXD and Famine getting into the swing of things heading up the field. TheCracker nets a second successive podium and drops into the second Ruf.
Race 5 - Opera Paris
1st Touring Mars (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Specialized (BMW M3 CSL)
3rd donbenni (BMW M3 CSL)
4th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
5th daan (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
Mars nets a third successive podium finish, and a first win - making it 5 different winners from the 5 races. He's the first to win in the Ruf 3400S, and so takes the lead by being the first driver into the Aston Martin Vantage V8 - going from little power and lots of manoeuvreability to... quite the opposite. Specialized and donbenni guide the pair of M3s onto the podium, with Ashley. finaly getting a breakthrough in the RGT, but having to sit out a race and face coming back in Race 7 still in the same car... D'oh!
donbenni and Roo visit the Opera...
Ashley. takes some wheel time
1 Ruf 3400S + 1 Opera Paris + 1 Touring Mars = Win
Specialized takes evasive action...
Race 6 - Deep Forest
1st VEXD (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd Famine (Jaguar XKR-R)
3rd daan (Ruf 3400S)
4th Race Idiot (Ruf RGT)
5th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
Race Idiot manages a second successive unwise 4th - keeping him in the RGT until at least Race 10! VEXD and Famine take the supposedly worst-in-the-race Jaguars to a 1-2 finish, with daan leading the trio of 3400Ss for the last podium spot.
Race 7 - Fuji 2005F
1st Roo (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Touring Mars (Aston Martin Vantage)
3rd Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
4th Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
5th donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
6th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
The Ruf 3400S quartet really suffered at Fuji, due to the honking great straight allowing the more powerful RGT and Vantage to get their legs out. Nevertheless, Roo jumps from zero to hero in successive races, taking the 3400S to the win, with Mars making it 4 podia from 4 races in the Aston and Ashley. finally making the leap from the RGT in 3rd.
"Hey, everybody!"
Race 8 - Apricot Hill Reverse
1st Race Idiot (Ruf RGT)
2nd VEXD (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd Famine (Aston Martin V8 Vantage)
4th donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
5th daan (Jaguar XKR-R)
6th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
TheCracker and donbenni struggled again to keep up with the vastly more powerful cars up front - the Ruf 3400S's manoeuvreability just not making up the difference when a long straight is involved. Race Idiot becomes the 7th different race winner, taking the RGT home ahead of VEXD's Mustang and Famine's Aston.
Race 9 - Twin Ring Motegi East
1st daan (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd Ashley. (BMW M3 CSL)
3rd Touring Mars (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
4th Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
5th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
daan takes the Jag home first, with Ashley. proving that the Ruf RGT was just a blip, nailing the M3 to the podium at the first attempt. Mars makes it 5 podia from 5 in the Mustang, joining VEXD in the Renaultsport Clio V6.
Race 10 - Hong Kong Reverse
1st Race Idiot (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Famine (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd VEXD (Renaultsport Clio V6)
4th donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
5th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
Race Idiot nets his second successive race win, using the nimble Ruf to good effect through the harsh corners at Hong Kong. Famine's Ford is hard to resist down the straight though - too hard for VEXD and donbenni who relinquish their 2nd/3rd battle on the very last lap, and end up fighting for 3rd. This battle is won by VEXD in the Clio. TheCracker and Roo end up 5th and 6th for the second race in a row.
Race 11 - Nurburgring Nordschleife (2 laps)
1st TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
2nd daan (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd Ashley. (Ruf 3400S)
4th Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
5th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
6th Touring Mars (Renaultsport Clio V6)
The little Clio is a bridge too far for Mars, not quite making the grade and a 6th successive podium spot. TheCracker - 7th different winner so far - leaps from Hong Kong Hell to Nordschleife Nirvana, followed home by daan's Mustang and Ashley. - 3rd podium in a row - in the baby Ruf.
Something tells me that The Green Hell doesn't faze Specialized...
...but such antics don't impress the crowd.
Race 12 - Tokyo R246 Reverse
1st donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Famine (Renaultsport Clio V6)
3rd Touring Mars (Renaultsport Clio V6)
4th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
5th VEXD (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th Race Idiot (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
donbenni - the 8th different winner in 12 races - leads the Clios of Famine and Mars home for the podium. The Astons couldn't make sufficient use of their power, despite the lengthy straight, and were split by VEXD's Lotus.
Mars drafting Famine at Tokyo...
No - that's not a ghost car - Mars takes the inside line.
Race 13 - Seoul Reverse
1st Ashley. (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd Race Idiot (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
3rd Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
4th TheCracker (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
5th daan (Renaultsport Clio V6)
6th VEXD (Lotus Esprit HC)
Ashley. breaks his duck in a Jaguar, leading Race Idiot's Aston home. Specialized ruins the British celebrations by dragging the sole German home in 3rd ahead of the Aston. VEXD and the Lotus aren't getting along so well - but in every handicap there's a Rubicon car, and the Esprit seems to be it...
VEXD's hands are too fast for the camera...
...but Ashley's Jaguar is too fast for VEXD. He's a Seoul Man!
Race 14 - Grand Valley East
1st Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
2nd VEXD (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd daan (Renaultsport Clio V6)
4th Touring Mars (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th donbenni (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
VEXD finally gets to grips with the Lotus, nailing it onto the second step, behind Roo in the flying Aston and daan's Clio. Mars and Famine's first experiences of the Lotus leave them 4th and 5th, with donbenni's slightly more literal flying Aston at the back.
Race 15 - Circuit de La Sarthe I
1st Specialized (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd TheCracker (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
3rd Race Idiot (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
4th donbenni (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
5th Ashley. (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
6th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
Power >>> All. Famine parks the Esprit at Mulsanne 1. Then Mulsanne 2. Then Indianapolis. Specialized leads the pack home in the Jag, from TheCracker's Aston and Race Idiot's Ford - making Specialized the 10th (and final) different winner in 15 races.
Famine is not impressed with the Esprit. "Which fool picked these bloody cars anyway? Oh, yeah..."
TheCracker + Aston Martin Vantage + La Sarthe I = Nonchalance...
Race 16 - Seattle
1st Ashley. (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
2nd Roo (Renaultsport Clio V6)
3rd VEXD (Lancia Stratos)
4th daan (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Touring Mars (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
Getting near the sharp end now, with every position changing every lap. VEXD is able to take advantage of some slippery handling up front and pick his way through the wreckage to take the Lancia to the podium, lead there by Roo's Clio and Ashley's Ford. The Loti form the rear of the pack.
Race 17 - Laguna Seca
1st Specialized (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
2nd Touring Mars (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd donbenni (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
4th TheCracker (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
5th Race Idiot (Renaultsport Clio V6)
6th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
There's no stopping Specialized now as he wins again, taking the Ford around its "home" circuit ahead of Mars's Esprit and donbenni's Aston.
Race 18 - Suzuka West
1st Race Idiot (Renaultsport Clio V6)
2nd VEXD (Opel Speedster Turbo)
3rd daan (Lotus Esprit HC)
4th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Roo (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th Ashley. (Lotus Esprit HC)
"Oh, by the way. On Suzuka West the first corner is 130R - and the second corner is right before Casio Triangle."
I distinctly remember those words... Race Idiot and VEXD pick their way through Lotus-shaped debris - leaving VEXD alone in the final car and daan leading the chasing pack of Esprits - chased to the line by Famine.
Race 19 - Cote d'Azur
1st TheCracker (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
2nd Roo (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd Ashley. (Lotus Esprit HC)
4th donbenni (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
5th Touring Mars (Lancia Stratos)
6th Specialized (Lotus Esprit HC)
Roo and Ashley. make best use of the Esprit in its natural home, taking 2nd and 3rd behind TheCracker's Mustang. Mars finds it hard to keep touch in the sorely underpowered Lancia, but splits the Mustang and Esprit of donbenni and Specialized.
Race 20 - Tsukuba
1st Specialized (Lotus Espirt HC)
2nd Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd Race Idiot (Lancia Stratos)
4th daan (Lancia Stratos)
5th VEXD (Lotus Elise Type 72)
6th Touring Mars (Lancia Stratos)
VEXD somehow drags the sole Elise into 5th, but the other Loti lead everyone home - Race Idiot driving the lead Lancia into 3rd.
Race 21 - Trial Mountain
1st VEXD (Lotus Elise Type 72)
2nd donbenni (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd Touring Mars (Lancia Stratos)
4th TheCracker (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Roo (Lancia Stratos)
6th Ashley. (Lancia Stratos)
Despite donbenni's close attentions, no-one could prevent VEXD from taking the Elise to a very unlikely win indeed - with no-one else in the series yet able to make it to the final car. A deserved series win!
M3: Touring Mars; Specialized; VEXD; TheCracker; donbenni; Ashley.
3400S: Roo; Famine; daan; Mars; TheCracker; Specialized; donbenni; Race Idiot; Ashley.
XKR-R: VEXD; Famine; daan; Ashley.; Specialized
Vantage: Touring Mars; Famine; Roo; Race Idiot; TheCracker; donbenni
Mustang: VEXD; Touring Mars; Famine; daan; Ashley.; Race Idiot; Specialized; TheCracker; donbenni
Clio: VEXD; Touring Mars; Famine; daan; Roo; Race Idiot; donbenni
Esprit: VEXD; Famine; Touring Mars; daan; Roo; Ashley.; Specialized; TheCracker
Stratos: VEXD; Touring Mars; Race Idiot; daan; Roo; Ashley.; Famine
Speedster: VEXD; Specialized; Race Idiot; Touring Mars
Elise: VEXD
Final Ranking
1. VEXD
2. Specialized
3. Race Idiot
4. Touring Mars
5. daan
6. Roo
7. Ashley.
8. Famine (damn that Esprit!)
9. TheCracker
10. donbenni
VEXD!
And, with the IDTV-of-doom still not complying, that's lunch... Just to settle Bite Me's mind:
It's Ashley.! Eating food! Though marijuana does give you terrible munchies...
Series 2 - GT300 Pick'n'mix
The classic format - 6 cars to choose from, you can only drive each one once. Driver line-ups were randomised so that drivers didn't face predominantly the same line-up each time. Old F1-style scoring - 10 points for the winner, then 6, 4, 3, 2 and 1 point for 6th.
Race 1 - Midfield
1st Famine (Celica)
2nd TheCracker (Celica)
3rd Race Idiot (RX-7)
4th daan (RX-7)
5th Ashley. (Impreza)
6th Specialized (Garaiya)
Famine nets the victory, and the Celica proves to be a strong pick, propelling TheCracker to 2nd ahead of a chasing pack of RX-7s. Is Specialized feeling the Kronenburg Effect?
Race 2 - New York Reverse
1st Touring Mars (MR-S)
2nd TheCracker (Impreza)
3rd VEXD (Impreza)
4th Roo (Celica)
5th donbenni (Impreza)
6th Famine (Silvia)
Famine slips from 1st to last, whle TheCracker performs with consistancy - two second places puts him top of the order... Mars is back in the groove and takes the RX-7 to win it.
Race 3 - Infineon Sports Car Course
1st Famine (RX-7)
2nd Race Idiot (Celica)
3rd TheCracker (RX-7)
4th daan (MR-S)
5th Specialized (Silvia)
6th donbenni (RX-7)
Famine switches back again, to lead a varied pack home at Infineon. Cracker manages a third successive podium finish, while Specialized seems to be improving - either through sobering up, or drinking more beer...
Race 4 - High Speed Ring Reverse
1st Touring Mars (Garaiya)
2nd daan (Celica)
3rd TheCracker (MR-S)
4th Famine (Garaiya)
5th Roo (Impreza)
6th donbenni (MR-S)
Pushing hard on the last lap, daan and Famine push too hard and go from 1-2 to 2-4 on the last real corner, allowing Mars to storm through for the victory - his second from 2 races. Oh, and the IDTV-of-doom isn't on yet.
Race 5 - Grand Valley Reverse
1st Specialized (Celica)
2nd daan (Impreza)
3rd Race Idiot (MR-S)
4th VEXD (MR-S)
5th TheCracker (Garaiya)
6th Ashley. (MR-S)
Specialized becomes a beer-guided missile and aces Grand Valley, from daan's Celica. At halfway, the leaderboard looks like this:
1st Famine - 24pt/4 races
2nd TheCracker - 22pt/5
3rd Touring Mars - 20pt/2
4th daan - 18pt/4
5th Race Idiot - 14pt/3
6th Specialized - 13pt/3
7th VEXD - 7pt/2
8th Roo - 5pt/2
9th donbenni - 4pt/3
10th Ashley. - 3pt/2
Famine leads by 2 from TheCracker, with a race's advantage - but Mars has driven fewer races than anyone else in the top 6. This race also marks the point at which every track available has been used once, so from this point on all of the "real" circuits are reused and we use the opposite direction variant of any of the other circuits.
Race 6 - Twin Ring Motegi East
1st Race Idiot (Impreza)
2nd Touring Mars (Celica)
3rd VEXD (Silvia)
4th Specialized (Impreza)
5th Ashley. (Silvia)
6th Roo (Silvia)
Mars suffers his first GT300 defeat, trailing Race Idiot's Impreza home. Race Idiot jumps to second in the table, behind Mars.
Race 7 Seoul
1st Touring Mars (RX-7)
2nd Race Idiot (Garaiya)
3rd Famine (Impreza)
4th daan (Silvia)
5th donbenni (Celica)
6th TheCracker (Silvia)
Mars gets instant payback on Race Idiot and pulls out a very useful 6 point advantage overall. Famine reinforces a 3rd place overall.
Race 8 Fuji Speedway 2005F
1st VEXD (Celica)
2nd Ashley. (Celica)
3rd Specialized (RX-7)
4th daan (Garaiya)
5th Race Idiot (Silvia)
6th Roo (Garaiya)
VEXD nets his first win in a GT300 on a track he claims to hate... Ashley wrestles the Celica to his first podium - but Mars's advantage seems sound...
1st Touring Mars - 36pt/4
2nd Race Idiot - 32pt/6
3rd Famine - 28pt/5
4th daan - 24pt/6
5th TheCracker - 23pt/6
6th VEXD - 21pt/4
7th Specialized - 20pt/5
8th Ashley. - 11pt/4
9th Roo - 7pt/4
10th donbenni - 6pt/4
Only 6th placed VEXD has enough ammo to overhaul Mars - Famine can only equal Mars (10pt maximum for Famine, 2pt minimum for Mars), which would also give them equal wins, leaving a second place for TM at Motegi to take the crown. And in another, unrelated piece of stunning news... the IDTV-of-Doom is finally cooperating, scarcely 10 hours after being first switched on..!
Race 9 - Cote d'Azur
1st Touring Mars (Impreza)
2nd VEXD (RX-7)
3rd Ashley. (Garaiya)
4th Specialized (MR-S)
5th donbenni (Silvia)
6th Roo (MR-S)
Mars takes the win and with it the series, a race early - VEXD's second place not enough to prevent it. Ashley. manages a second successive podium.
Monagascques everywhere are petrified as Specialized and Ashley., crossed-arm-stylee, take to the streets...
VEXD bides his time - and incidentally, there's a lap time for you all to chase, for entry to UKGTP7...
Race 10 - Apricot Hill
1st VEXD (Garaiya)
2nd Famine (MR-S)
3rd donbenni (Garaiya)
4th Touring Mars (Silvia)
5th Ashley. (RX-7)
6th Roo (RX-7)
In an essentially dead race, VEXD salvages some pride with a win and places himself second in the table. Famine secures third overall with a second place.
Final Rankings
1st Mars - 49 points
2nd VEXD - 37 points
3rd Famine - 34 points
4th Race Idiot - 32 points
5th daan - 24 points
6th Specialized - 23 points (1 win)
7th TheCracker - 23 points (0 wins)
8th Ashley. - 17 points
9th donbenni - 12 points
10th Roo - 9 points
Touring Mars!
And so... to the pub!
But the adventures of the day don't end there - nosiree! It was a fancy dress party at The Rutland, for Hallowe'en. Many of the locals came in their usual attire and won prizes immediately - while the UKGTP6 gang sat in a "quiet" corner (which inexplicably magnified the atrocious karaoke) and enjoyed a quite sauce (except Ashley, who was on the smothered citrines all evening).
Touring Mars, TheCracker, daan, Famine, VEXD, Specialized, Ashley., donbenni and Race Idiot sample the night"life"...
Keen to save us from boredom, The Hood and Dodgeball's Fran started having a simulated procreation 8 feet away:
and the semi-pro karaoke chanteuse politely informed us that she was going to attempt the next song while going to the toilet. Thinking I'd half heard this, she rammed the point home by walking off to the toilet, carrying a radio mic.
Nnnnnokay then.
Some people may think, at this point, that I'm being grossly unfair on the locals and clearly exaggerating points. Just as a reminder, this is the town that paid people to do this:
Sunday
After an uneventful night *whistles* breakfast was served by a very kindly gentleman, rechristened "Phillip" by newly-rechristened Spidey, and we revelled in the fantastic Newarkian trompe a l'oeuil:
Almost Da Vincian in its subtlety and majesty. Anyway, on to the racing...
More to follow...
Series 3 - TVR Trophy
Exactly the same format as the GT300 series, but with the six "sane" TVRs instead - Cerbera, Griffith, T350C, Tamora, Tuscan and V8S.
Race 1 - Deep Forest Reverse
1st Famine (Tamora)
2nd daan (Griffith)
3rd Race Idiot (Tamora)
4th TheCracker (350C)
5th Ashley. (Tamora)
6th Specialized (350C)
Famine takes an early lead, with daan fighting through the pack from the back in the Griffith.
Race 2 - Grand Valley East Reverse
1st Specialized (Tuscan)
2nd Touring Mars (Tamora)
3rd donbenni (T350C)
4th Famine (V8S)
5th Ashley. (V8S)
6th Roo (T350C)
Specialized shows his specialism by once again going from last in one race to winning the next - though it was far too early for any beer to have taken effect yet. I think. Famine and Ashley. pull the awful V8S to not-last places - a 4th place finish being the joint best anyone will manage.
Race 3 - Trial Mountain Reverse
1st Touring Mars (Cerbera)
2nd VEXD (Tamora)
3rd donbenni (Tamora)
4th daan (V8S)
5th TheCracker (V8S)
6th Roo (V8S)
Mars picks up where he left off in the GT300s, taking the Cerbera to a win - the trio of V8Ss unsurprisingly bringing up the rear.
Race 4 - Infineon Sports Car Course
1st Race Idiot (Cerbera)
2nd daan (Tamora)
3rd Touring Mars (Tuscan)
4th Specialized (Tamora)
5th TheCracker (Griffith)
6th VEXD (V8S)
Not even VEXD can cope with a solitary V8S against a field of superior cars - Race Idiot notches a second successive win for a Cerbera.
Race 5 - New York
1st Famine (Tuscan)
2nd Ashley. (Cerbera)
3rd Specialized (Cerbera)
4th donbenni (Griffith)
5th Race Idiot (V8S)
6th Roo (Cerbera)
Famine fends off the attentions of the Cerberae (Cerberas. Whatever), despite suffering... errr... "brake fade" on lap one and letting the whole pack through by way of apology. Whoops. Ashley. and Specialized are close at hand in Cerberases to finish the podium. At the halfway point, the leaderboard says:
1st - Famine - 23pt/3 races
2nd - Touring Mars - 20pt/3
3rd - Specialized - 18pt/2
4th - Race Idiot - 16pt/3
5th - daan - 15pt/3
6th - donbenni - 11pt/3
7th - Ashley. - 10pt/3
8th - VEXD - 7pt/2
9th - TheCracker - 7pt/3
10th - Roo - 3pt/3
Race 6 - Circuit de La Sarthe 2
1st Famine (Cerbera)
2nd VEXD (Tuscan)
3rd Ashley. (Tuscan)
4th daan (Tuscan)
5th donbenni (Tuscan)
6th Roo (Tuscan)
With VEXD, Ashley. and Famine forming a drafting triplet, the other three cars - all Tuscans - were quickly left behind and, until the final pass through Mulsanne Corner, the race could have been anyone's. Ashley., in the draft, came in a little hotter than he expected and held up VEXD, allowing Famine enough of a margin to hold to the line. One of the more gripping races for the spectators (and podium finishers!).
Race 7 - Laguna Seca
1st Race Idiot (Griffith)
2nd Touring Mars (Griffith)
3rd VEXD (T350C)
4th TheCracker (Tamora)
5th donbenni (Cerbera)
6th daan (T350C)
The Griffith was boss at Laguna Seca, V8ing its way to a 1-2 finish past the puny 6 cylinders... Race Idiot takes a second series win, tying Mars up for second in the series...
Race 8 - Nurburgring
1st VEXD (Cerbera)
2nd Touring Mars (T350C)
3rd Famine (T350C)
4th Ashley. (T350C)
5th Roo (Griffith)
6th donbenni (V8S)
VEXD wins at the 'Ring. Next up on truly shocking stories to stun the world - ice cubes make your soda colder! Yes - pretty much the expected result here, though the chasing T350Cs didn't let him have it all his own way. Okay, they did, but... so's your face. Roo manages his first not-last in a set of cars he really doesn't seem to like... So with just the two races left, the table is hotting up quite a bit:
1st - Famine - 37pt/5 races
2nd - Touring Mars - 32pt/5
3rd - VEXD - 27pt/5
4th - Race Idiot - 26pt/4
5th - daan - 19pt/5
6th - Specialized - 18pt/4
7th - Ashley. - 17pt/5
8th - donbenni - 16pt/6
9th - TheCracker - 10pt/5
10th - Roo - 6pt/5
Despite it being relatively close, only three of the top four can win it but nothing less than a second place at Suzuka will do for Mars - and only if Famine finishes last at Opera - but Race Idiot has a race in hand... The fight for second is still wide open though, with everyone down to 6th still in with a shot...
Race 9 - Opera Paris Reverse
1st Race Idiot (T350C)
2nd TheCracker (Tuscan)
3rd Famine (Griffith)
4th Ashley. (Griffith)
5th Specialized (V8S)
6th Roo (Tamora)
Race Idiot does his utmost to ensure a top finish, by winning at Opera. With Famine securing 4 points for 3rd place, Race Idiot needs a 2nd or better - and only a win for Mars will be good enough to take the title away... In the event of Mars winning from Race Idiot in 2nd, there'll be a tie for the win on 42 points, with Race Idiot taking it overall for a higher number of wins... Tense stuff.
Race 10 - Suzuka
1st daan (Cerbera)
2nd VEXD (Griffith)
3rd Race Idiot (Tuscan)
4th TheCracker (Cerbera)
5th Touring Mars (V8S)
6th Specialized (Griffith)
daan and VEXD upset the applecart by streaking out to the front and staying there. Race Idiot beats Mars for the runner-up spot, but finishes 1 place shy of where he needs to be to take the series...
1st - Famine - 41pt
2nd - Race Idiot - 40pt
3rd - Touring Mars - 34pt
4th - VEXD - 33pt
5th - daan - 29pt
6th - Specialized - 21pt
7th - Ashley. - 20pt
8th - TheCracker - 19pt
9th - donbenni - 16pt
10th - Roo - 7pt
So... the ultimate winner of the TVR Trophy pick'n'mix is...
Famine!
Next up, after a short break, the UKGTP's rapidly-becoming-signature-event, the Clio Cup Endurance Race...
Series 4 - Clio Cup Endurance Race
With all the ranking data so far collected, drivers were paired up into teams - highest ranked driver with lowest, second ranked driver with second lowest, and so on and so forth. The teams can start with whichever driver, but must change drivers at each pit stop, for added amusement. The teams were thus:
Team 1: donbenni & VEXD
Team 2: Roo & Touring Mars
Team 3: Ashley. & Race Idiot
Team 4: Famine & TheCracker
Team 5: daan & Specialized
Each team had to pick a different coloured car - Team 1 went white, Team 2 silver, Team 3 yellow, Team 4 black and Team 5 pink. Hello sailor!
The game was set to 50 laps, strong tyre wear and the drivers aimed at a course that doesn't usually feature endurance races. At UKGTPV it was Deep Forest, but at 6 I chose Grand Valley East Reverse, for a pleasant mix of relative unfamiliarity (it's not a common circuit backwards) and good length laptimes (range was 1'14-1'16 for a fast lap). I tried to instigate a Le Mans start for VEXD, preferably from Morrisons' car park, but it didn't happen.
More to follow...
Roo, TheCracker, Ashley. & Specialized, toe-to-toe...
Roo grabs the lead...
Series 5 - Muscle Car Mix & Match
The final series of the weekend - going from a pinsharp-handling yet underpowered Clio to overpowered, overtorqued, understeer ground zero Muscle cars. The same format as the previous series - six Muscle Cars, each driver driving each once and once alone...
Due to some... comings and goings during the series (we were getting close to donbenni's departure, so VEXD gave him a lift to the station) there was a strange mathematical ****-up which left one driver inexplicably short of one race, so we doubled the points for that driver for the last race (when the ****-up was discovered). D'ohhhhhhhh!
Race 1 - Tsukuba
1st Race Idiot
2nd daan
3rd Famine
4th TheCracker
5th Specialized
6th Ashley.
Race 2 - High Speed Ring
1st Mars
2nd Specialized
3rd donbenni
4th Roo
5th Famine
6th Ashley.
Race 3 - Grand Valley
1st Race Idiot
2nd VEXD
3rd Mars
4th Specialized
5th TheCracker
6th daan
Race 4 - Tokyo R246
1st Dan
2nd daan
3rd VEXD
4th Touring Mars
5th donbenni
6th Roo
Race 5 - Suzuka West
1st Mars
2nd VEXD
3rd Dan
4th Race Idiot
5th daan
6th donbenni
Race 6 - SS Route 5
1st Famine
2nd Specialized
3rd Touring Mars
4th Roo
5th donbenni
6th Ashley.
Race 7 - Hong Kong
1st Race Idiot
2nd Famine
3rd Ashley.
4th Roo
5th donbenni
6th Specialized
Race 8 - El Capitan Reverse
1st Famine
2nd Roo
3rd Ashley.
4th Race Idiot
5th TheCracker
6th Specialized
Race 9 - Autumn Ring Reverse
1st Touring Mars
2nd Roo
3rd Famine
4th daan
5th VEXD
6th donbenni (DNS)
Race 10 - Midfield Reverse
1st VEXD
2nd Race Idiot
3rd daan
4th Specialized
5th Ashley.
6th -
Saturday
For once I was actually early - beating all but the caretaker and our wondrous host EXelero to the venue. Though I did have an excuse - the IDTV-of-doom was catching a cold and needed an hour to warm up before it turned itself on. It was plugged in at 9.20am, so should be ready by the time the network was up and running and the racers were oiled and raring to go.
In theory.
EXelero and the caretaker's stepladder - his real ladder left him when he was 6.
It didn't take long for the rest of the dregs to arrive, fashionably late despite staying in a hotel just 100 yards away. And lo, we had an event.
The LAN logged itself in with the minimum of fuss, unlike last time and, just an hour behind schedule, we started racing. With the IDTV-of-doom still warming itself up.
Ashley., Specialized, donbenni, TheCracker, Roo and Touring Mars
Series 1 - Coupe Handicap
As before, a number of coupes (or at the least 2 door cars) listed from fastest to slowest. All drivers start off level, in the fastest car and, as they succeed, they move down the list to progressively slower cars. The ultimate winner of the series is the first driver to win a race in the slowest car on the list.
In order to extend the handicap idea a little further, and to allow for the numbers, the winner of any race would advance two cars, with 2nd and 3rd placed man advancing one, and all three miss the next race.
With 9 attendees, the three top-ranked drivers from the previous event sat out the first race - VEXD, Famine and daan.
Race 1 - Autumn Ring
1st Roo (Ruf RGT)
2nd Touring Mars (Ruf RGT)
3rd Specialized (Ruf RGT)
4th donbenni (Ruf RGT)
5th TheCracker (Ruf RGT)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
Roo breaks the ice on the weekend, taking race 1 and advancing down two cars to the Ruf 3400S. Mars and Specialized move on to the BMW M3 CSL. donbenni, TheCracker and Ashley. stay on for a second attempt in the ass-engined missile.
donbenni - the picture of concentration
TheCracker takes the Ruf route to the top
Race 2 - Suzuka
1st Famine (Ruf RGT)
2nd VEXD (Ruf RGT)
3rd TheCracker (Ruf RGT)
4th donbenni (Ruf RGT)
5th daan (Ruf RGT)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
Famine and VEXD live up to their rankings by taking the Rufs to 1st and 2nd - VEXD managing a complete 360 through 130R while pushing hard (too hard, as it turns out). TheCracker leapfrogs donbenni for the third spot, and a crack in the M3.
Race 3 - SS Route 5 Reverse
1st daan (Ruf RGT)
2nd Touring Mars (BMW M3 CSL)
3rd donbenni (Ruf RGT)
4th Specialized (BMW M3 CSL)
5th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
daan hooks up his Ruf at the second time of asking, with donbenni guiding a second one into third slot. Mars performs above his car, taking it to second. Roo struggles in the weakest car, with Ashley. not having much luck with the RGT.
At this point in the proceedings, Race Idiot turned up - very fashionably late. But of course the beauty of the handicap is that any driver can turn up at virtually any point and jump into the top car, working their way down the system like everybody else...
Of course, we need to address the issue of there being 10 drivers with only 3 sitting out each race... The solution is to have 4th place sitting out a race, though not progressing a car. 5th and 6th obviously need the positive effect of the handicap more, so making them sit out works against the ethos of the handicap.
Unfortunately for Specialized...
Race 4 - El Capitan
1st VEXD (BMW M3 CSL)
2nd Famine (Ruf 3400S)
3rd TheCracker (BMW M3 CSL)
4th Race Idiot (Ruf RGT)
5th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
6th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
The two fastest cars ended up off the podium, with VEXD and Famine getting into the swing of things heading up the field. TheCracker nets a second successive podium and drops into the second Ruf.
Race 5 - Opera Paris
1st Touring Mars (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Specialized (BMW M3 CSL)
3rd donbenni (BMW M3 CSL)
4th Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
5th daan (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
Mars nets a third successive podium finish, and a first win - making it 5 different winners from the 5 races. He's the first to win in the Ruf 3400S, and so takes the lead by being the first driver into the Aston Martin Vantage V8 - going from little power and lots of manoeuvreability to... quite the opposite. Specialized and donbenni guide the pair of M3s onto the podium, with Ashley. finaly getting a breakthrough in the RGT, but having to sit out a race and face coming back in Race 7 still in the same car... D'oh!
donbenni and Roo visit the Opera...
Ashley. takes some wheel time
1 Ruf 3400S + 1 Opera Paris + 1 Touring Mars = Win
Specialized takes evasive action...
Race 6 - Deep Forest
1st VEXD (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd Famine (Jaguar XKR-R)
3rd daan (Ruf 3400S)
4th Race Idiot (Ruf RGT)
5th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Ruf 3400S)
Race Idiot manages a second successive unwise 4th - keeping him in the RGT until at least Race 10! VEXD and Famine take the supposedly worst-in-the-race Jaguars to a 1-2 finish, with daan leading the trio of 3400Ss for the last podium spot.
Race 7 - Fuji 2005F
1st Roo (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Touring Mars (Aston Martin Vantage)
3rd Ashley. (Ruf RGT)
4th Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
5th donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
6th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
The Ruf 3400S quartet really suffered at Fuji, due to the honking great straight allowing the more powerful RGT and Vantage to get their legs out. Nevertheless, Roo jumps from zero to hero in successive races, taking the 3400S to the win, with Mars making it 4 podia from 4 races in the Aston and Ashley. finally making the leap from the RGT in 3rd.
"Hey, everybody!"
Race 8 - Apricot Hill Reverse
1st Race Idiot (Ruf RGT)
2nd VEXD (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd Famine (Aston Martin V8 Vantage)
4th donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
5th daan (Jaguar XKR-R)
6th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
TheCracker and donbenni struggled again to keep up with the vastly more powerful cars up front - the Ruf 3400S's manoeuvreability just not making up the difference when a long straight is involved. Race Idiot becomes the 7th different race winner, taking the RGT home ahead of VEXD's Mustang and Famine's Aston.
Race 9 - Twin Ring Motegi East
1st daan (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd Ashley. (BMW M3 CSL)
3rd Touring Mars (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
4th Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
5th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
daan takes the Jag home first, with Ashley. proving that the Ruf RGT was just a blip, nailing the M3 to the podium at the first attempt. Mars makes it 5 podia from 5 in the Mustang, joining VEXD in the Renaultsport Clio V6.
Race 10 - Hong Kong Reverse
1st Race Idiot (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Famine (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd VEXD (Renaultsport Clio V6)
4th donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
5th TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
6th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
Race Idiot nets his second successive race win, using the nimble Ruf to good effect through the harsh corners at Hong Kong. Famine's Ford is hard to resist down the straight though - too hard for VEXD and donbenni who relinquish their 2nd/3rd battle on the very last lap, and end up fighting for 3rd. This battle is won by VEXD in the Clio. TheCracker and Roo end up 5th and 6th for the second race in a row.
Race 11 - Nurburgring Nordschleife (2 laps)
1st TheCracker (Ruf 3400S)
2nd daan (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd Ashley. (Ruf 3400S)
4th Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
5th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
6th Touring Mars (Renaultsport Clio V6)
The little Clio is a bridge too far for Mars, not quite making the grade and a 6th successive podium spot. TheCracker - 7th different winner so far - leaps from Hong Kong Hell to Nordschleife Nirvana, followed home by daan's Mustang and Ashley. - 3rd podium in a row - in the baby Ruf.
Something tells me that The Green Hell doesn't faze Specialized...
...but such antics don't impress the crowd.
Race 12 - Tokyo R246 Reverse
1st donbenni (Ruf 3400S)
2nd Famine (Renaultsport Clio V6)
3rd Touring Mars (Renaultsport Clio V6)
4th Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
5th VEXD (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th Race Idiot (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
donbenni - the 8th different winner in 12 races - leads the Clios of Famine and Mars home for the podium. The Astons couldn't make sufficient use of their power, despite the lengthy straight, and were split by VEXD's Lotus.
Mars drafting Famine at Tokyo...
No - that's not a ghost car - Mars takes the inside line.
Race 13 - Seoul Reverse
1st Ashley. (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd Race Idiot (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
3rd Specialized (Ruf 3400S)
4th TheCracker (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
5th daan (Renaultsport Clio V6)
6th VEXD (Lotus Esprit HC)
Ashley. breaks his duck in a Jaguar, leading Race Idiot's Aston home. Specialized ruins the British celebrations by dragging the sole German home in 3rd ahead of the Aston. VEXD and the Lotus aren't getting along so well - but in every handicap there's a Rubicon car, and the Esprit seems to be it...
VEXD's hands are too fast for the camera...
...but Ashley's Jaguar is too fast for VEXD. He's a Seoul Man!
Race 14 - Grand Valley East
1st Roo (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
2nd VEXD (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd daan (Renaultsport Clio V6)
4th Touring Mars (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th donbenni (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
VEXD finally gets to grips with the Lotus, nailing it onto the second step, behind Roo in the flying Aston and daan's Clio. Mars and Famine's first experiences of the Lotus leave them 4th and 5th, with donbenni's slightly more literal flying Aston at the back.
Race 15 - Circuit de La Sarthe I
1st Specialized (Jaguar XKR-R)
2nd TheCracker (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
3rd Race Idiot (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
4th donbenni (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
5th Ashley. (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
6th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
Power >>> All. Famine parks the Esprit at Mulsanne 1. Then Mulsanne 2. Then Indianapolis. Specialized leads the pack home in the Jag, from TheCracker's Aston and Race Idiot's Ford - making Specialized the 10th (and final) different winner in 15 races.
Famine is not impressed with the Esprit. "Which fool picked these bloody cars anyway? Oh, yeah..."
TheCracker + Aston Martin Vantage + La Sarthe I = Nonchalance...
Race 16 - Seattle
1st Ashley. (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
2nd Roo (Renaultsport Clio V6)
3rd VEXD (Lancia Stratos)
4th daan (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Touring Mars (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
Getting near the sharp end now, with every position changing every lap. VEXD is able to take advantage of some slippery handling up front and pick his way through the wreckage to take the Lancia to the podium, lead there by Roo's Clio and Ashley's Ford. The Loti form the rear of the pack.
Race 17 - Laguna Seca
1st Specialized (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
2nd Touring Mars (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd donbenni (Aston Martin Vantage V8)
4th TheCracker (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
5th Race Idiot (Renaultsport Clio V6)
6th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
There's no stopping Specialized now as he wins again, taking the Ford around its "home" circuit ahead of Mars's Esprit and donbenni's Aston.
Race 18 - Suzuka West
1st Race Idiot (Renaultsport Clio V6)
2nd VEXD (Opel Speedster Turbo)
3rd daan (Lotus Esprit HC)
4th Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Roo (Lotus Esprit HC)
6th Ashley. (Lotus Esprit HC)
"Oh, by the way. On Suzuka West the first corner is 130R - and the second corner is right before Casio Triangle."
I distinctly remember those words... Race Idiot and VEXD pick their way through Lotus-shaped debris - leaving VEXD alone in the final car and daan leading the chasing pack of Esprits - chased to the line by Famine.
Race 19 - Cote d'Azur
1st TheCracker (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
2nd Roo (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd Ashley. (Lotus Esprit HC)
4th donbenni (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
5th Touring Mars (Lancia Stratos)
6th Specialized (Lotus Esprit HC)
Roo and Ashley. make best use of the Esprit in its natural home, taking 2nd and 3rd behind TheCracker's Mustang. Mars finds it hard to keep touch in the sorely underpowered Lancia, but splits the Mustang and Esprit of donbenni and Specialized.
Race 20 - Tsukuba
1st Specialized (Lotus Espirt HC)
2nd Famine (Lotus Esprit HC)
3rd Race Idiot (Lancia Stratos)
4th daan (Lancia Stratos)
5th VEXD (Lotus Elise Type 72)
6th Touring Mars (Lancia Stratos)
VEXD somehow drags the sole Elise into 5th, but the other Loti lead everyone home - Race Idiot driving the lead Lancia into 3rd.
Race 21 - Trial Mountain
1st VEXD (Lotus Elise Type 72)
2nd donbenni (Ford Mustang SVT Cobra R)
3rd Touring Mars (Lancia Stratos)
4th TheCracker (Lotus Esprit HC)
5th Roo (Lancia Stratos)
6th Ashley. (Lancia Stratos)
Despite donbenni's close attentions, no-one could prevent VEXD from taking the Elise to a very unlikely win indeed - with no-one else in the series yet able to make it to the final car. A deserved series win!
M3: Touring Mars; Specialized; VEXD; TheCracker; donbenni; Ashley.
3400S: Roo; Famine; daan; Mars; TheCracker; Specialized; donbenni; Race Idiot; Ashley.
XKR-R: VEXD; Famine; daan; Ashley.; Specialized
Vantage: Touring Mars; Famine; Roo; Race Idiot; TheCracker; donbenni
Mustang: VEXD; Touring Mars; Famine; daan; Ashley.; Race Idiot; Specialized; TheCracker; donbenni
Clio: VEXD; Touring Mars; Famine; daan; Roo; Race Idiot; donbenni
Esprit: VEXD; Famine; Touring Mars; daan; Roo; Ashley.; Specialized; TheCracker
Stratos: VEXD; Touring Mars; Race Idiot; daan; Roo; Ashley.; Famine
Speedster: VEXD; Specialized; Race Idiot; Touring Mars
Elise: VEXD
Final Ranking
1. VEXD
2. Specialized
3. Race Idiot
4. Touring Mars
5. daan
6. Roo
7. Ashley.
8. Famine (damn that Esprit!)
9. TheCracker
10. donbenni
VEXD!
And, with the IDTV-of-doom still not complying, that's lunch... Just to settle Bite Me's mind:
It's Ashley.! Eating food! Though marijuana does give you terrible munchies...
Series 2 - GT300 Pick'n'mix
The classic format - 6 cars to choose from, you can only drive each one once. Driver line-ups were randomised so that drivers didn't face predominantly the same line-up each time. Old F1-style scoring - 10 points for the winner, then 6, 4, 3, 2 and 1 point for 6th.
Race 1 - Midfield
1st Famine (Celica)
2nd TheCracker (Celica)
3rd Race Idiot (RX-7)
4th daan (RX-7)
5th Ashley. (Impreza)
6th Specialized (Garaiya)
Famine nets the victory, and the Celica proves to be a strong pick, propelling TheCracker to 2nd ahead of a chasing pack of RX-7s. Is Specialized feeling the Kronenburg Effect?
Race 2 - New York Reverse
1st Touring Mars (MR-S)
2nd TheCracker (Impreza)
3rd VEXD (Impreza)
4th Roo (Celica)
5th donbenni (Impreza)
6th Famine (Silvia)
Famine slips from 1st to last, whle TheCracker performs with consistancy - two second places puts him top of the order... Mars is back in the groove and takes the RX-7 to win it.
Race 3 - Infineon Sports Car Course
1st Famine (RX-7)
2nd Race Idiot (Celica)
3rd TheCracker (RX-7)
4th daan (MR-S)
5th Specialized (Silvia)
6th donbenni (RX-7)
Famine switches back again, to lead a varied pack home at Infineon. Cracker manages a third successive podium finish, while Specialized seems to be improving - either through sobering up, or drinking more beer...
Race 4 - High Speed Ring Reverse
1st Touring Mars (Garaiya)
2nd daan (Celica)
3rd TheCracker (MR-S)
4th Famine (Garaiya)
5th Roo (Impreza)
6th donbenni (MR-S)
Pushing hard on the last lap, daan and Famine push too hard and go from 1-2 to 2-4 on the last real corner, allowing Mars to storm through for the victory - his second from 2 races. Oh, and the IDTV-of-doom isn't on yet.
Race 5 - Grand Valley Reverse
1st Specialized (Celica)
2nd daan (Impreza)
3rd Race Idiot (MR-S)
4th VEXD (MR-S)
5th TheCracker (Garaiya)
6th Ashley. (MR-S)
Specialized becomes a beer-guided missile and aces Grand Valley, from daan's Celica. At halfway, the leaderboard looks like this:
1st Famine - 24pt/4 races
2nd TheCracker - 22pt/5
3rd Touring Mars - 20pt/2
4th daan - 18pt/4
5th Race Idiot - 14pt/3
6th Specialized - 13pt/3
7th VEXD - 7pt/2
8th Roo - 5pt/2
9th donbenni - 4pt/3
10th Ashley. - 3pt/2
Famine leads by 2 from TheCracker, with a race's advantage - but Mars has driven fewer races than anyone else in the top 6. This race also marks the point at which every track available has been used once, so from this point on all of the "real" circuits are reused and we use the opposite direction variant of any of the other circuits.
Race 6 - Twin Ring Motegi East
1st Race Idiot (Impreza)
2nd Touring Mars (Celica)
3rd VEXD (Silvia)
4th Specialized (Impreza)
5th Ashley. (Silvia)
6th Roo (Silvia)
Mars suffers his first GT300 defeat, trailing Race Idiot's Impreza home. Race Idiot jumps to second in the table, behind Mars.
Race 7 Seoul
1st Touring Mars (RX-7)
2nd Race Idiot (Garaiya)
3rd Famine (Impreza)
4th daan (Silvia)
5th donbenni (Celica)
6th TheCracker (Silvia)
Mars gets instant payback on Race Idiot and pulls out a very useful 6 point advantage overall. Famine reinforces a 3rd place overall.
Race 8 Fuji Speedway 2005F
1st VEXD (Celica)
2nd Ashley. (Celica)
3rd Specialized (RX-7)
4th daan (Garaiya)
5th Race Idiot (Silvia)
6th Roo (Garaiya)
VEXD nets his first win in a GT300 on a track he claims to hate... Ashley wrestles the Celica to his first podium - but Mars's advantage seems sound...
1st Touring Mars - 36pt/4
2nd Race Idiot - 32pt/6
3rd Famine - 28pt/5
4th daan - 24pt/6
5th TheCracker - 23pt/6
6th VEXD - 21pt/4
7th Specialized - 20pt/5
8th Ashley. - 11pt/4
9th Roo - 7pt/4
10th donbenni - 6pt/4
Only 6th placed VEXD has enough ammo to overhaul Mars - Famine can only equal Mars (10pt maximum for Famine, 2pt minimum for Mars), which would also give them equal wins, leaving a second place for TM at Motegi to take the crown. And in another, unrelated piece of stunning news... the IDTV-of-Doom is finally cooperating, scarcely 10 hours after being first switched on..!
Race 9 - Cote d'Azur
1st Touring Mars (Impreza)
2nd VEXD (RX-7)
3rd Ashley. (Garaiya)
4th Specialized (MR-S)
5th donbenni (Silvia)
6th Roo (MR-S)
Mars takes the win and with it the series, a race early - VEXD's second place not enough to prevent it. Ashley. manages a second successive podium.
Monagascques everywhere are petrified as Specialized and Ashley., crossed-arm-stylee, take to the streets...
VEXD bides his time - and incidentally, there's a lap time for you all to chase, for entry to UKGTP7...
Race 10 - Apricot Hill
1st VEXD (Garaiya)
2nd Famine (MR-S)
3rd donbenni (Garaiya)
4th Touring Mars (Silvia)
5th Ashley. (RX-7)
6th Roo (RX-7)
In an essentially dead race, VEXD salvages some pride with a win and places himself second in the table. Famine secures third overall with a second place.
Final Rankings
1st Mars - 49 points
2nd VEXD - 37 points
3rd Famine - 34 points
4th Race Idiot - 32 points
5th daan - 24 points
6th Specialized - 23 points (1 win)
7th TheCracker - 23 points (0 wins)
8th Ashley. - 17 points
9th donbenni - 12 points
10th Roo - 9 points
Touring Mars!
Mars in receipt of the beautifully handcrafted GT300 prize. Feel the awe!
And so... to the pub!
But the adventures of the day don't end there - nosiree! It was a fancy dress party at The Rutland, for Hallowe'en. Many of the locals came in their usual attire and won prizes immediately - while the UKGTP6 gang sat in a "quiet" corner (which inexplicably magnified the atrocious karaoke) and enjoyed a quite sauce (except Ashley, who was on the smothered citrines all evening).
Touring Mars, TheCracker, daan, Famine, VEXD, Specialized, Ashley., donbenni and Race Idiot sample the night"life"...
Keen to save us from boredom, The Hood and Dodgeball's Fran started having a simulated procreation 8 feet away:
and the semi-pro karaoke chanteuse politely informed us that she was going to attempt the next song while going to the toilet. Thinking I'd half heard this, she rammed the point home by walking off to the toilet, carrying a radio mic.
Nnnnnokay then.
Some people may think, at this point, that I'm being grossly unfair on the locals and clearly exaggerating points. Just as a reminder, this is the town that paid people to do this:
Sunday
After an uneventful night *whistles* breakfast was served by a very kindly gentleman, rechristened "Phillip" by newly-rechristened Spidey, and we revelled in the fantastic Newarkian trompe a l'oeuil:
Almost Da Vincian in its subtlety and majesty. Anyway, on to the racing...
More to follow...
Series 3 - TVR Trophy
Exactly the same format as the GT300 series, but with the six "sane" TVRs instead - Cerbera, Griffith, T350C, Tamora, Tuscan and V8S.
Race 1 - Deep Forest Reverse
1st Famine (Tamora)
2nd daan (Griffith)
3rd Race Idiot (Tamora)
4th TheCracker (350C)
5th Ashley. (Tamora)
6th Specialized (350C)
Famine takes an early lead, with daan fighting through the pack from the back in the Griffith.
Race 2 - Grand Valley East Reverse
1st Specialized (Tuscan)
2nd Touring Mars (Tamora)
3rd donbenni (T350C)
4th Famine (V8S)
5th Ashley. (V8S)
6th Roo (T350C)
Specialized shows his specialism by once again going from last in one race to winning the next - though it was far too early for any beer to have taken effect yet. I think. Famine and Ashley. pull the awful V8S to not-last places - a 4th place finish being the joint best anyone will manage.
Race 3 - Trial Mountain Reverse
1st Touring Mars (Cerbera)
2nd VEXD (Tamora)
3rd donbenni (Tamora)
4th daan (V8S)
5th TheCracker (V8S)
6th Roo (V8S)
Mars picks up where he left off in the GT300s, taking the Cerbera to a win - the trio of V8Ss unsurprisingly bringing up the rear.
Race 4 - Infineon Sports Car Course
1st Race Idiot (Cerbera)
2nd daan (Tamora)
3rd Touring Mars (Tuscan)
4th Specialized (Tamora)
5th TheCracker (Griffith)
6th VEXD (V8S)
Not even VEXD can cope with a solitary V8S against a field of superior cars - Race Idiot notches a second successive win for a Cerbera.
Race 5 - New York
1st Famine (Tuscan)
2nd Ashley. (Cerbera)
3rd Specialized (Cerbera)
4th donbenni (Griffith)
5th Race Idiot (V8S)
6th Roo (Cerbera)
Famine fends off the attentions of the Cerberae (Cerberas. Whatever), despite suffering... errr... "brake fade" on lap one and letting the whole pack through by way of apology. Whoops. Ashley. and Specialized are close at hand in Cerberases to finish the podium. At the halfway point, the leaderboard says:
1st - Famine - 23pt/3 races
2nd - Touring Mars - 20pt/3
3rd - Specialized - 18pt/2
4th - Race Idiot - 16pt/3
5th - daan - 15pt/3
6th - donbenni - 11pt/3
7th - Ashley. - 10pt/3
8th - VEXD - 7pt/2
9th - TheCracker - 7pt/3
10th - Roo - 3pt/3
Race 6 - Circuit de La Sarthe 2
1st Famine (Cerbera)
2nd VEXD (Tuscan)
3rd Ashley. (Tuscan)
4th daan (Tuscan)
5th donbenni (Tuscan)
6th Roo (Tuscan)
With VEXD, Ashley. and Famine forming a drafting triplet, the other three cars - all Tuscans - were quickly left behind and, until the final pass through Mulsanne Corner, the race could have been anyone's. Ashley., in the draft, came in a little hotter than he expected and held up VEXD, allowing Famine enough of a margin to hold to the line. One of the more gripping races for the spectators (and podium finishers!).
Race 7 - Laguna Seca
1st Race Idiot (Griffith)
2nd Touring Mars (Griffith)
3rd VEXD (T350C)
4th TheCracker (Tamora)
5th donbenni (Cerbera)
6th daan (T350C)
The Griffith was boss at Laguna Seca, V8ing its way to a 1-2 finish past the puny 6 cylinders... Race Idiot takes a second series win, tying Mars up for second in the series...
Race 8 - Nurburgring
1st VEXD (Cerbera)
2nd Touring Mars (T350C)
3rd Famine (T350C)
4th Ashley. (T350C)
5th Roo (Griffith)
6th donbenni (V8S)
VEXD wins at the 'Ring. Next up on truly shocking stories to stun the world - ice cubes make your soda colder! Yes - pretty much the expected result here, though the chasing T350Cs didn't let him have it all his own way. Okay, they did, but... so's your face. Roo manages his first not-last in a set of cars he really doesn't seem to like... So with just the two races left, the table is hotting up quite a bit:
1st - Famine - 37pt/5 races
2nd - Touring Mars - 32pt/5
3rd - VEXD - 27pt/5
4th - Race Idiot - 26pt/4
5th - daan - 19pt/5
6th - Specialized - 18pt/4
7th - Ashley. - 17pt/5
8th - donbenni - 16pt/6
9th - TheCracker - 10pt/5
10th - Roo - 6pt/5
Despite it being relatively close, only three of the top four can win it but nothing less than a second place at Suzuka will do for Mars - and only if Famine finishes last at Opera - but Race Idiot has a race in hand... The fight for second is still wide open though, with everyone down to 6th still in with a shot...
Race 9 - Opera Paris Reverse
1st Race Idiot (T350C)
2nd TheCracker (Tuscan)
3rd Famine (Griffith)
4th Ashley. (Griffith)
5th Specialized (V8S)
6th Roo (Tamora)
Race Idiot does his utmost to ensure a top finish, by winning at Opera. With Famine securing 4 points for 3rd place, Race Idiot needs a 2nd or better - and only a win for Mars will be good enough to take the title away... In the event of Mars winning from Race Idiot in 2nd, there'll be a tie for the win on 42 points, with Race Idiot taking it overall for a higher number of wins... Tense stuff.
Race 10 - Suzuka
1st daan (Cerbera)
2nd VEXD (Griffith)
3rd Race Idiot (Tuscan)
4th TheCracker (Cerbera)
5th Touring Mars (V8S)
6th Specialized (Griffith)
daan and VEXD upset the applecart by streaking out to the front and staying there. Race Idiot beats Mars for the runner-up spot, but finishes 1 place shy of where he needs to be to take the series...
1st - Famine - 41pt
2nd - Race Idiot - 40pt
3rd - Touring Mars - 34pt
4th - VEXD - 33pt
5th - daan - 29pt
6th - Specialized - 21pt
7th - Ashley. - 20pt
8th - TheCracker - 19pt
9th - donbenni - 16pt
10th - Roo - 7pt
So... the ultimate winner of the TVR Trophy pick'n'mix is...
Famine!
Next up, after a short break, the UKGTP's rapidly-becoming-signature-event, the Clio Cup Endurance Race...
Series 4 - Clio Cup Endurance Race
With all the ranking data so far collected, drivers were paired up into teams - highest ranked driver with lowest, second ranked driver with second lowest, and so on and so forth. The teams can start with whichever driver, but must change drivers at each pit stop, for added amusement. The teams were thus:
Team 1: donbenni & VEXD
Team 2: Roo & Touring Mars
Team 3: Ashley. & Race Idiot
Team 4: Famine & TheCracker
Team 5: daan & Specialized
Each team had to pick a different coloured car - Team 1 went white, Team 2 silver, Team 3 yellow, Team 4 black and Team 5 pink. Hello sailor!
The game was set to 50 laps, strong tyre wear and the drivers aimed at a course that doesn't usually feature endurance races. At UKGTPV it was Deep Forest, but at 6 I chose Grand Valley East Reverse, for a pleasant mix of relative unfamiliarity (it's not a common circuit backwards) and good length laptimes (range was 1'14-1'16 for a fast lap). I tried to instigate a Le Mans start for VEXD, preferably from Morrisons' car park, but it didn't happen.
More to follow...
Roo, TheCracker, Ashley. & Specialized, toe-to-toe...
Roo grabs the lead...
Series 5 - Muscle Car Mix & Match
The final series of the weekend - going from a pinsharp-handling yet underpowered Clio to overpowered, overtorqued, understeer ground zero Muscle cars. The same format as the previous series - six Muscle Cars, each driver driving each once and once alone...
Due to some... comings and goings during the series (we were getting close to donbenni's departure, so VEXD gave him a lift to the station) there was a strange mathematical ****-up which left one driver inexplicably short of one race, so we doubled the points for that driver for the last race (when the ****-up was discovered). D'ohhhhhhhh!
Race 1 - Tsukuba
1st Race Idiot
2nd daan
3rd Famine
4th TheCracker
5th Specialized
6th Ashley.
Race 2 - High Speed Ring
1st Mars
2nd Specialized
3rd donbenni
4th Roo
5th Famine
6th Ashley.
Race 3 - Grand Valley
1st Race Idiot
2nd VEXD
3rd Mars
4th Specialized
5th TheCracker
6th daan
Race 4 - Tokyo R246
1st Dan
2nd daan
3rd VEXD
4th Touring Mars
5th donbenni
6th Roo
Race 5 - Suzuka West
1st Mars
2nd VEXD
3rd Dan
4th Race Idiot
5th daan
6th donbenni
Race 6 - SS Route 5
1st Famine
2nd Specialized
3rd Touring Mars
4th Roo
5th donbenni
6th Ashley.
Race 7 - Hong Kong
1st Race Idiot
2nd Famine
3rd Ashley.
4th Roo
5th donbenni
6th Specialized
Race 8 - El Capitan Reverse
1st Famine
2nd Roo
3rd Ashley.
4th Race Idiot
5th TheCracker
6th Specialized
Race 9 - Autumn Ring Reverse
1st Touring Mars
2nd Roo
3rd Famine
4th daan
5th VEXD
6th donbenni (DNS)
Race 10 - Midfield Reverse
1st VEXD
2nd Race Idiot
3rd daan
4th Specialized
5th Ashley.
6th -
.
