More like 'Ruddy Krap Machines'.
Edit: Since no one's been adding anything, I'll use this as my results post as well.
Tarmac Test Course: Toscana Custom Track, 'Mt Akina', 4.10 miles X 2 (Total length - 8.20 Miles)
Gravel Test Course: Eiger Nordwand W Trail, 0.98 miles X 4 (Total length - 3.96 Miles)
Snow Test Course: Alaska Custom Track, Alaska Rally1S, 5.50 miles X 1
CSLACR's Lancia Stratos-
Tarmac: Well tuned 1st for standing starts. A lot of grip in the corners, less scary than any other Stratos I've driven. Very quick turn in. Feels too numb in corners sometimes.
Gravel: Very easy to work with, even on a relatively unknown surface. Very controllable, easy to manage. Doesn't bite. Much. Need to tread carefully, too much throttle + short wheel base + slippery gravel = spin. Great fun to try and master though.
Snow: Edgy. Scary. 1st is useless, need to short shift. Car lacks grip on surfaces and on turns with banking.
XDesperado's Mitsubishi Evo VI RS T.M-
Tarmac: Doesn't feel particularly fast, pulls well. Corners like a dream, fun when wanted, efficient and easy to handle when needed. No AYC = Better, feels like it has AYC, sans the unpredictable swaying. Responsive in corners, great fun to hoon. Reminds me of the Bergmeister.
Gravel: Not much difference between this and the actual rally car. Faster than a 710hp Gallardo, stable, sure-footed. Can actually corner on dirt, rather than drift. Remains easy to drive. One of few Evos I think I'm starting to like.
Snow: WEEEEEE!!!!! I AM DRIVING GOD!!!! Super fun, super easy to control. Car handles almost perfectly. Very confident in letting you push the limits. Makes you have no fear, even in snow. Yes, this is an Evo I like. Ohhh yes.
GfxJG's Mini Cooper S-
Tarmac: Feels faster than it is. Sharp turn in for a FF. Huge grip makes you feel confident. FF understeer makes you ruin your pants. Overconfidence is an issue, many occasions, I've understeered off due to trusting the grippy feeling too much. Also tries to oversteer on corner entry. Wheelspinning lunatic of a car, wears out tyres after two laps, but is still easy to drive. I like.
Gravel: Wheelspins to hell and back. Steering is sharp, but the rest of the car is just dragged straight ahead by the engine. It's only drivable on exit to most corners in gears as high as 4th (as a minimum). Hard to maintain momentum through corners.
Snow: Doesn't wheelspin as much on this surface. Does have some form of torque steer/slight uncontrolled veering on bumpy surfaces. Brakes need to be stronger, can't stop it quick enough. Understeers on banked corners unless you take the inner most line.
Jackthalad's Subaru Impreza Sedan WRX STi Spec C RA-
Tarmac: Grip. Mental grip. Verging slightly towards understeer when pushed. Best driven smoothly. Very easy car to drive fast. Just keep it smooth. Most relaxing car to drive of the lot. Gears need to be made longer to keep the RA in the power band more.
Gravel: Smooth as silk. Honestly. I have never driven a car, any tuned car, that's so relaxing and easy. It encourages you not to push the limits. It also seems to act as a sensory deprivation tank, you could be doing a 1:10.xxx lap, but inside, it feels like a 1:30.xxx lap. A really odd car. But also the fastest. By 5 full seconds.
I am officially
'd.
Snow: Slightly rougher ride, but still not what you'd call stressy. It responds well to 4 wheel drifting, so don't try any opposite lock. It'll bite you for that. But overall, I think this is the easiest car to drive of the lot.
VTiRoj's Alpine A110 1600S-
Tarmac: Um……let's see. Grips well enough for a RR, handling is fairly balanced and there is some fun for when you get a tad bored. Which you will. It's got less power than an ant, but it can out handle and out run a DC5 Integra.
The steering is fairly quick, but there just isn't enough power for me to accurately make any judgments.
Gravel: That's more like it. Sort of. Because of the frankly pathetic power, you only really need a touch of brakes and a bit of momentum to get it around corners quickly. But don't forget, it is a RR. Too much, and you'll be back where you started. And there's so little power, I didn't exceed 80 in the whole 4 laps of testing. (4 laps, 6 minutes *yawn*) If there is a problem here, it's the restrictions.
Snow: Much of the same. Except that you can keep the throttle wielded wide open and it won't make a difference as you can't get up to much speed in the first place. There isn't that much wrong about the car, in fact, there is only one issue. The ruddy stupid restictions.
krenkme's Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution V GSR-
Tarmac: Super close ratios gears means this can hang with Vipers and M5s from a standing start. Grip > handling. Tyre wear is biased towards the front. Turn in is good, as is the lack of an AYC. No awful electronics spoiling the experience here. Very easy car to drive fast, like all Japanese 4WD sport saloons.
Gravel: Understeers a tad on gravel if you're not careful. Flicking it into turns seems to work better than turning into the corner. Throttle control is also something to be aware of, such short gears seem to amplify handling issues and understeer. Still very easy and fun to drive.
Snow: Still a grip monster. Doesn't let go, flies though corners with ease regardless of how much grip is there. Feels like it can handle even more power. Good car all round.
Rotary Junkie's Alpine A110 1600S-
Tarmac: 1st is too long, RJ!!!! You of all people should know!!! It bogs down when you try to launch it from a standing start. Otherwise, it's an…ok car. The handling is fairly good, nice and easy to drive. A bit of an arse when you overdo it, but it's RR, what do you expect? It also has a strange sense that it isn't quite finished. The handling, though fairly good as said, is a tad inconsistent. Still, not too bad for just 175hp.
Gravel: Ah. Now I see why 1st is so long. It's to stop the thing from smacking the redline constantly in the lower gears, right? Anyway, the car is more of about thrill and slide rather than say…grip and glide, like the Evos and Scooby. But it understeers a tad if you brake too late, sometimes, you could have too much momentum and spin it. But only if you're as thick as me. Throttle control is required, though you don't need to be god like at it.
Snow: Need to have better throttle control. Tank-slappers are irrecoverable from, unless you're very lucky or run into a fence of sorts. Compounded by sensitive steering, RR layout and lack of grip. Loves to slide, very controlled. Till the lack of grip overwhelms it.
CyKosis1973's Peugeot 206 S16-
Tarmac: Goes like that ricey 90hp shopping trolley we all seem to have in mind, but grips enough to compensate. Understeer is kept to a minimum and there's fun to be had when you give it a flick into the corner. Very easy to drive, responsive steering and no understeer issues means this car is great fun.
Gravel: Much of the same, rear is more slippery, front still grips well. Still easy to drive. Still fun. A good starting car if you've just started rally driving.
Snow: Understeers if you're not careful, and that will range from slight understeer to simply failing to steer at all, depending on the situation. Otherwise, top of the FWD class.
praiano63's Mini Cooper S-
Tarmac: Rather loose, actually. Nothing like any of the FF cars in the shootout, rather drives more like those cars from the FF shootout from days gone by. A very eager car, good fun. 1st is too short for standing start launch.
Gravel: Gears are too short, car is redlining on the dirt even in 4th, but I'm only going 14mph. Braking causes the revs to plummet, handling isn't as good as it was on tarmac.
Snow: Steering is heavier, car can't quite cope with elevation changes and banking as well as it should. Slightly more understeer.
dr_slump's Mitsubishi CZ3 Tarmac-
Tarmac: Saved the best till last. Hugely fun, hugely fast. Grips like RS tyres, easy to drive. A bit on the loose side, but really controllable. Good feeling through the steering. Best car of the lot on tarmac.
Gravel: A different story altogether. Very slippery for a 4WD car. Unable to stick to its line consistently. Doesn't feel too quick.
Snow: A mix of the above. It still lacks the speedy feel, but is good fun to hoon, very easy to drive and quite fast. Brakes are a bit too soft for snow.
Rankings-
FWD (Tarmac)- Praiano's Mini Cooper S
FWD (Gravel)- Cykosis1973's Peugeot 206
FWD (Snow)- Cykosis1973's Peugeot 206
FWD (Overall)- Cykosis1973's Peugeot 206
RWD (Tarmac)- CSLACR's Stratos
RWD (Gravel)- CSLACR's Stratos
RWD (Snow)- CSLACR's Stratos
RWD (Overall)- CSLACR's Stratos (duh…
4WD (Tarmac)- Dr_slump's CZ3
4WD (Gravel)- Jackthalad's Subaru Impreza Spec C Type RA
4WD (Snow)- XDesperado's Mitsubishi Evo VI R.S T.M
4WD (Overall)- XDesperado's Mitsubishi Evo VI R.S T.M
Final rankings-
-XDesperado's Mitsubishi Evo VI R.S T.M
-Jackthalad's Subaru Impreza Spec C Type RA
-Dr_slump's CZ3
-krenkme's Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution V GSR
-CSLACR's Stratos
-VTiRoj's Alpine A110
-Cykosis1973's Peugeot 206
-Praiano's Mini Cooper S
-GfxJG's Mini Cooper S
-Rotary Junkie's Alpine A1110
) and it might just be the combination of drivetrain, weight and power, but I'd suggest that people new(ish) to rally in GT5 might like to take the Pug out for a spin first. I'm not being down on anyone else or trying to big myself up, if anything I'm being a bit down on myself. I've always struggled with the rally element of GT5 and if you have too, then try something a little more sedate than some of the bruisers I've tried. Seriously, before you go jumping in a 300bhp, 1200kg pocket rocket, try it in something a little calmer. You'll do yourself a favour and you'll do the other cars a favour too. You're not going to enjoy them if you're constantly pinging off the barriers 
).
