Funny/Strange News Stories

[TenEightyOne]

I've had many a quiet picnic along the Estuary near the Dartford Crossing. Well, if you ignore the docks, Bluewater shopping centre, Essex Arena banger racing and the fact that it's under the approach for London City airport. Apart from that it's a stunning rural backwater. Some say a hidden gem.

It's a lovely place, always lots of people parked in long lines enjoying the view

 

[polysmut]

It's a lovely place, always lots of people parked in long lines enjoying the view

& don't forget, it's free of charge after 10pm.

 

[JKgo]

....Well now, wow.

...They came, they ate, and left without paying. All 120 of them. BBC.

Apparently, the diners were celebrating a baptism. Is there a connection between this and not paying close to 2000 Euros in bills? Nope. Not a bit.

Apparently, they have struck again. Only 10 Km away from their original scene of crime, no less.

http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-39184533

This time, the damage to the unpaid bills is 10k. In Euros, of course.

 

[TenEightyOne]

All that way norf of the river at this time of night? On yer bike, guvnor.

 

[TenEightyOne]

There has been some discussion in other threads about water quality, environmental plans and Canada's water supply in particular. Couldn't be a better time for this.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Lawyer catches fire during arson trial.

 

[JKgo]

Lawyer catches fire during arson trial.

...Well, it's close enough, but Karma's a bitc... uh, I mean, a female dog.

 

[eran0004]

14:33 - Fewer jobs in the US than expected
14:39 - More jobs in the US than expected

Someone must have been hiring like crazy around 14:36

 

[JKgo]

...When you're on live TV, don't forget to lock your doors.

BBC video.

 

[Grayfox]

View attachment 633098

14:33 - Fewer jobs in the US than expected
14:39 - More jobs in the US than expected

Someone must have been hiring like crazy around 14:36

Must have been trump, hiring some cheap mexican labor.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Must have been trump, hiring some cheap mexican labor.

All that Russian steel for the Keystone pipeline isn't going to lay itself, you know.

 

[Northstar]

All that Russian steel for the Keystone pipeline isn't going to lay itself, you now.

Nonsense, he needs them to build his (yuge!) wall.

 

[Grayfox]

All that Russian steel for the Keystone pipeline isn't going to lay itself, you know.

Nah I was thinking the wall, he did say mexico will build it.
It is those "illegals", in exchange for permanent residency they have to build the wall.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Meanwhile, in Australia ...

http://mobile.abc.net.au/news/2017-03-15/perth-cyclists-draw-a-goat-with-202km-route/8356466

 

[TenEightyOne]

US spends about £2.5m shooting down £200 drone.

 

[JKgo]

US spends about £2.5m shooting down £200 drone.

Gen Perkins suggested deploying large surface-to-air missiles as a defence was probably not economically wise.

"I'm not sure that's a good economic exchange ratio," he told an audience at the Association of the United States Army's Global Force symposium in Alabama.

...Huh. You don't say.

 

[JKgo]

...How to become a young divorcee, part one: BBC video.

 

[JKgo]

....Hmm.

A trucker is fined for not playing to his stereotypes - by making salad on the hard shoulder. BBC.

 

[m8h3r]

Edit: Turned out to be alt news.

 

[daan]

http://southendnewsnetwork.com/news...hment-increased-to-six-points-and-a-500-fine/

So how did you lose you license....

You do realise that's a joke news story, and that' snot what this thread is about?

 

[axletramp]

You do realise that's a joke news story, and that' snot what this thread is about?

No need to be so picky.

 

[m8h3r]

Ah nuts my mistake. That's fair enough. 👍

 

[gnomefromnome]

http://kyuk.org/post/snake-gets-loose-ravn-flight-aniak-anchorage

Ravn issued a statement saying it prohibits rodents, ferrets, reptiles, and snakes being used as service animals on its flights and that the snake was not registered to travel on the aircraft.

 

[JKgo]

...Welp. I had Sam Jackson "snakes on a plane" meme lying around somewhere. I seemed to have misplaced it somehow...

 

[JKgo]

...Uber pulls suspends autonomous cars after a crash: BBC.


Truth is, I didn't find the news itself funny or weird. But what caught my attention was the accompanying image. Specifically, this one:

Can you see the irony of a Volvo, reputed to be one of the most safest, robust cars around, lying on its side after a crash that didn't involve a donut-eating meatbag in command of the controls? I sure did, and I sure had a good chuckle at it.

 

[prisonermonkeys]

This week in Trump, including this question asked of Neil Gorsuch:

Spoiler

"Would you rather fight 100 duck-sized horses or one horse-sized duck?"

 

[DK]

...Uber pulls suspends autonomous cars after a crash: BBC.


Truth is, I didn't find the news itself funny or weird. But what caught my attention was the accompanying image. Specifically, this one:

View attachment 636983

Can you see the irony of a Volvo, reputed to be one of the most safest, robust cars around, lying on its side after a crash that didn't involve a donut-eating meatbag in command of the controls? I sure did, and I sure had a good chuckle at it.

Not really, seeing as Volvo is Latin for "I roll".

 

[TenEightyOne]

Nova Scotian man's licence plate renewal is refused.

He blames Trump. True story.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Brexit's turning out to be a difficult time for the UK but fortunately the Daily Mail is there to remind us that Sturgeon and May are women. With legs. Phwoar, eh? Eh?

EDIT: Breaking news... don't like the Mail story? Get a life, sezmail.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Far more weird than funny... Italian authorities foil plot to steal Ferrari. I mean, actually steal Ferrari.