Funny/Strange News Stories

[Grayfox]

Considering how full of themselves Trader Joe's are, I can't say I'm surprised they would claim such a thing.

Isnt north korea the one that makes bold claims?
Like Kim Jong Il inventing the hamburger.

 

[Northstar]

Like Kim Jong Il inventing the hamburger.

How dare you make up such slanderous lies about hour honorable leader!

He came up with the idea for a hamburger during his famous 11 hole-in-one golf round.

 

[Grayfox]

How dare you make up such slanderous lies about hour honorable leader!

He came up with the idea for a hamburger during his famous 11 hole-in-one golf round.

But he did do a 11hole in ones, I've done 14 when I was young.
It was putt putt golf but a hole in one is a hole in one

 

[Lizard]

We call those, pigs in a blanket.

That's a cocktail sausage wrapped in bacon.

 

[ryzno]

I would like to say we have a redneck version. Take a hot dog, wrap it in Pillsbury dough(whole square), wrap that in bacon, brush with butter or bacon fat for those not worried about calories, bake and enjoy.
Don't forget the mustard!

 

[Liquid]

It's not exactly serious enough to put in the US thread but Donald Trump has gifted the Australian PM Malcolm Turnbull a DJT Signature Collection tie:

Never mind that this once again shows the vanity or narcissism of Mr Trump, this is so Alan Partridge it hurts.

 

[TenEightyOne]

It's not exactly serious enough to put in the US thread but Donald Trump has gifted the Australian PM Malcolm Turnbull a DJT Signature Collection tie:

Never mind that this once again shows the vanity or narcissism of Mr Trump, this is so Alan Partridge it hurts.

I thought it was given to him by the Pope of a Coptic church?

 

[JKgo]

I thought it was given to him by the Pope of a Coptic church?

...Indeed, that's my understanding as well. His Donaldness hasn't gifted Mr. Turnbull anything, at least not to my knowledge...

 

[UKMikey]

His relationship with Mr Trump became a talking point after the US president was reported to have abruptly ended a phone call between the two in January.

Mr Turnbull later disputed this and the pair are said to have repaired ties.

Pun intended?

 

[prisonermonkeys]

...Indeed, that's my understanding as well. His Donaldness hasn't gifted Mr. Turnbull anything, at least not to my knowledge...

Whoever it came from, he won't wear it. Our politicians have this weird fixation with ties. It started when someone pointed out that red ties made Tony Abbott look too aggressive, so he started consciously wearing pale blue ones. This apparently wasn't enough to change public perceptions of him (gasp!), but now we have this bizarre phenomenon where politicians colour-coordinate their ties based on what they want to achieve.

But even if that wasn't an issue, no tie could ever go with the high-vis vests they wear.

That's a cocktail sausage wrapped in bacon.

None of those listed are sausage rolls. A sausage roll is sausage mince (and any other filling) wrapped in puff pastry and baked. It's a blue-collar version of a beef Wellington.

 

[TenEightyOne]

None of those listed are sausage rolls. A sausage roll is sausage mince (and any other filling) wrapped in puff pastry and baked. It's a blue-collar version of a beef Wellington.

Pfft, no it isn't, and a proper* sausage roll recipe is older than your whole country!

* Proper meaning British, as I've already said

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Nanendra Modi figures out how to avoid Donald Trump's handshake.

Bonus points for the awkward expression on Trump's face.

Pfft, no it isn't, and a proper* sausage roll recipe is older than your whole country!

* Proper meaning British, as I've already said

Hey, we're beating you in everything that matters. Better cricket team? Check. Better rugby team? Check. Sunny weather? Check. Now we can add cuisine to that list.

The only thing Britain is better than Australia at is having a government that squanders a parliamentary majority into a minority government. I didn't think anyone could beat Malcolm Turnbull until Theresa May did it.

 

[JKgo]

Better cricket team?

...Uh, no, last time the two of them met, Australian boys were sent packing from the ICC tournament....

Better rugby team?

...Well, I can give you that one. But, on the flip side, the English football team is better than the Australian one, so it's a tie, then.

Sunny weather?

....Too sunny, actually. What was that thing about the high number of skin cancer sufferers in Australia again?

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Uh, no, last time the two of them met, Australian boys were sent packing from the ICC tournament

I'm going by historical averages.

But, on the flip side, the English football team is better than the Australian one, so it's a tie, then.

Give us a few years.

What was that thing about the high number of skin cancer sufferers in Australia again?

It was probably published in the same journal that discussed high rates of ennui in Britain.

 

[Touring Mars]

Singhsbury's renamed Morrisinghs after Sainsbury's 'legal row'

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-tyne-40416049

 

[prisonermonkeys]

Now we know why Donald Trump is fixated on fake news.

 

[Pezzarinho17]

I love that one of the secondary headlines is "Global Warming: A New Age of Extinction"

 

[Liquid]

Woman delays flight for several hours after throwing coins at plane engine "for good luck".

Of the nine coins launched, only one hit its intended target - but this was enough to force the evacuation of 150 passengers for several hours.

[...]

Police later shared their findings, [the coins] having a total value of about 1.7 yuan (£0.20 / $0.25).

I would be furious if someone did that to my flight.

 

[ProjectWHaT]

http://hosted2.ap.org/PASHA/66bc2f9...andalized/id-488b2136252e4f5383dd7543f46f695c

Rock formation shaped like a penis was vandalized. Norwegians are now collecting money to make the rock erect again.

 

[JKgo]

....Hmm. Is that a case of.... rockblock??

That old dude atop the hard formation seems happy to be riding on it. Good for him.

 

[Liquid]

 

[Danoff]

http://hosted2.ap.org/PASHA/66bc2f9...andalized/id-488b2136252e4f5383dd7543f46f695c

Rock formation shaped like a penis was vandalized. Norwegians are now collecting money to make the rock erect again.

It is such a bad idea to try to fix that. I can't even think of all of the problems with that. First of all, it's not interesting anymore if it's man-made. At best you'd have to look at it and think "wow, so that's what it looked like on its own... before we fixed it to look like that". Second, there are some serious liability concerns. Old dude is riding that rock and falls to his death, massive lawsuit. Third, it's gonna get re-vandalized, how much money do you want to pour into this?

Some dillweed ruined an interesting natural formation, time to move on.

Edit:

I think John Bobbitt might be able to put them in touch with the right people for that job though.

 

[TenEightyOne]

Youtubers prove that a thick book does* stop a bullet. BBC.

*Doesn't. It doesn't stop a bullet. Sorry about that.

 

[Northstar]

Youtubers prove that a thick book does* stop a bullet. BBC.

*Doesn't. It doesn't stop a bullet. Sorry about that.

Here's a quote from a local news site explaining their "logic"

Perez also told authorities Ruiz showed her a different book that he had shot, and the bulled did not go all the way through.

I dare you to find a single flaw in that logic!

Also, why on earth would you use a bloody Desert Eagle for such a stunt?

 

[Obelisk]

Youtubers prove that a thick book does* stop a bullet. BBC.

*Doesn't. It doesn't stop a bullet. Sorry about that.

That's just tragic. And unbelievably stupid on the boyfriend's part. A .50 AE fired from a foot away will punch through a lot.

 

[Danoff]

And unbelievably stupid ...

That's the funny part.

 

[polysmut]

Also, why on earth would you use a bloody Desert Eagle for such a stunt?

The fact that you've got "Replica" written down the side of your guns...
And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five 0" written down the side of mine...

 

[Lizard]

French air force commander uses fighter jets as means of personal travel.

https://www.theguardian.com/world/2...-jaunts-gen-richard-reboul-provence?CMP=fb_gu

 

[Grayfox]

Also, why on earth would you use a bloody Desert Eagle for such a stunt?

Youtube views which means money.

Darwins law did its thing that all that matters to me.

 

[Touring Mars]

Youtubers prove that a thick book does* stop a bullet. BBC.

*Doesn't. It doesn't stop a bullet. Sorry about that.

I came here to post this story too... he should have used 'The Origin of Species' just for that extra touch.