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I think the two countries that those rules have been applied to are Iran and NK. It's historically complicated for both but the TLDR is that both have strongly claimed an intention to use them first (one against Israel, one against the US). For the MAD countries the deterrent is, in theory, going to be annihilating in retaliation for a first strike.
For NK they may use nukes before the US uses nukes, but it's still only in response to actual imminent threat to the country.
https://www.vox.com/world/2017/8/8/16112046/north-korea-threat-nuke-us-attack
NK is I'm sure well aware that the moment the US launches a serious attack on them, even with conventional weapons, their ability to launch could be disabled very quickly. As their nuclear weapons are really the only thing that they have that allows them to credibly threaten the US, the correct defensive strategy is to make their use conditional on the US attacking. That is then a nuclear deterrent.
I think in a situation where the survival of your country is at stake (or you reasonably believe it to be so), using nuclear weapons against the enemy is a valid option. Some people wouldn't take that option, but it's not hard to understand the sort of patriotism that would lead someone to do so.
As far as Iran, when was this? All the statements from Iran regarding nuclear technology in the last decade or so have been that they want all the benefits of nuclear industry (and there are many) except for weapons. Or at least all the ones that I've seen.
We have already expressed our views about nuclear bombs. We said those who are seeking to build nuclear bombs or those who stockpile, they are politically and mentally retarded. We think they are stupid because the era of nuclear bombs is over."
"Iran, for example, should continue its efforts and tolerate all international treasures only to build a nuclear bomb or a few nuclear bombs that are useless? They can never be used? And is not capable of confronting with the U.S. nuclear arsenals? The overall budget of our national atomic energy agency is $250 million, and the whole budget is aimed at peaceful activities."
"But the government of the United States only allocated $80 million for rebuilding the nuclear bombs. I think Iranians are clever enough to see that with this limited amount of money, $250 million, we are not able to be at war with the other side."
http://globalpublicsquare.blogs.cnn...leged-plot-nuclear-weapons-and-americas-role/
Seems like a pretty sensible and rational stance to me. They're also part of the non-proliferation treaty and have repeatedly had inspections from the IAEA. How is Iran even on the same page as NK? You know, apart from them being fairly solidly anti-American?