The Simpsons Quotes

[Cap'n Jack]

Marge:Kid's I have some bad news about Lenny
:Bart & lisa: Oh no not Lenny!

 

[oscarfulz]

dont remember the exact lines but it was when homer was talking to bart and he was drunk

"homer: you see boy. a women is alot like a refrigerator"

 

[Bollocks#999]

Homer: I love these pedestrian malls, there's a lot less traffic

 

[millencolin]

same episode
when homer was trapped in the fountain and people were laughing "please dont laugh, i was one of you"

 

[Powripper]

Originally posted by millencolin
apus chutney flavoured squishie

"You can really taste the chutney"

ha ha ha..thats the best!!

 

[Bollocks#999]

Lenny: Homer's singing to his ball again
Carl: Well its working, he's bowling a 280
Lenny: (Singing) There's a kind of hush, all over the world, tonight


Homer: Stupid sexy Flanders

 

[nk4e]

homer:maggie, call aquaman

 

[tabs]

Homer: I hope there isn't another lighting round.
*gets struck by lighting*
Homer: ohh i see. i hope there isn't an ice cream round! awww

 

[miniMADness]

Homer - "....Five dollars? get outta here"

 

[Jay]

Originally posted by radicool02

Barney the dinosaur(on TV):"2+2 is 4 2+2 is four"
Homer:"I can see how this is funny"

thats a classic

 

[Jay]

i like the ep when:

lisa and homers mom was singing "how many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a man"

Homer: seven!

Lisa: no dad its a rhetorical question

Homer: rhetorical hey?.............. eight!!

 

[Powripper]

thats a good one vipergt...this one was so funny!!:

grampa simpson: "In my day turkeys where called walkin birds, so every thanksgiving we would have a walkin bird, with all the trimmings, like cranberries, potatoes, and yams stuffed with gun powder!

 

[Bollocks#999]

Mr.Burns: I should be able to run over as many kids as I want

 

[Cap'n Jack]

bart(On the phone):Hi is there a hugh there, Hugh Jass?
Moe:Hello, any hugh jasses here?
Hugh Jass: Im hugh Jass.

 

[Solid Lifters]

Homer: "Butter your bacon, boy!"

Bart: "But dad, my heart hurts!"

Homer: "I said, butter it!"

 

[Pupik]

Originally posted by radicool02
bart(On the phone):Hi, is there a hugh there, Hugh Jass?
Moe: Hello, any hugh jasses here?
Hugh Jass: I'm hugh Jass.

Bart: Um, this has been a bad joke, so I'd like to end this call as soon as possible.

Hugh Jass: No problem.

[Bart hangs up phone.]

Hugh Jass: That was a nice kid.

 

[Bollocks#999]

Apu: Hey Homer, hows it hangin?
Homer: Low and lazy

 

[Bollocks#999]

Patti: Go and shake your money maker (To Selma)

 

[Mike Rotch]

Homer: If the Bible has taught us nothing else, and it hasn't, its that girls should stick to girl's sports, such as hot oil wrestling foxy boxy and such and such...


Homer to Bart: If something is too hard, give it up. The moral my boy is too never try anything .

 

[Jay]

i dont know if this one has been meantioned yet?

Homer: hehe...White people have names like Lenny, and black people have names like Carl.

 

[Cap'n Jack]

Homer:Hehe mule.

 

[Bollocks#999]

Gypsy woman: Hey Cursie, cursie, cursie, cursie, hows that curse I put on you?
Homer: Now I know you may not remember me...

 

[Cap'n Jack]

Snorky:Snorky...talk...man...Sorry, eon's ago dolphin's lived on the land.
Moe:What he say?
Carl:He said that dolphin's used to live on the land.
Moe:Whaaaa!

 

[xAkirax2004]

Originally posted by Solid Lifters
Homer: "Butter your bacon, boy!"

Bart: "But dad, my heart hurts!"

Homer: "I said, butter it!"

Homer: And bacon up that sausage, boy!

 

[tabs]

Wow, I wonder how long this thread will stick around for.

Fish: Spare me and I will grant you three wis AHHHHH!!
Bart: Knife goes in, guts come out.


--From the Poochey episode--
Homer: Aww, it wasn't that bad was it? Was it?
Homer's brain: Oh, you don't wanna what I think. Now just look sad and say, "D'oh."
Homer: D'oh...

 

[oscarfulz]

this thread will stick FOREVER muahahha

my name is poochie, something something something the rappin dog.. lol dont remember but in that episode its funny when was it Nelson? punches bart in the stomach after the premeire

 

[Bollocks#999]

Homer: Just because I dont care, doesent mean I dont understand
a little later..

Lisa: You sir are a BABOON
Homer: Honey, I dont think yoy know what your saying
Lisa: BABOON BABOON BABOON BABOON

 

[oscarfulz]

later...

homer: "did you hear that marge she just called me the ugliest smelliest apes of them all"

(something along those lines)

 

[Cap'n Jack]

Lisa:...if I win I get a protractor.
Homer:Too bad we don't live on a farm!


Homer:...there's one thing he can't buy!
Marge:What's that?
Homer:...A dinosaur!

 

[Jay]

Originally posted by radicool02
Lisa:...if I win I get a protractor.
Homer:Too bad we don't live on a farm!

thats a classic