The Simpsons Quotes

[nk4e]

homer-i got ur nose

baby bart- i got ur wallet(flushes it in the toilet)

homer- d' oh

 

[Cap'n Jack]

homer:"HEY BIG SPENDER DIG THIS BLENDER RAINBOW SUSPENDERS"
Croud:"We surender"
Homer:"SPEEEEEENDER"!

Homer:Uh uh uh uh table five table five uh uh uh uh table fiiiii-iiiiii-iiii-iiiiive"!
Disco stu:"Disco stu likes disco music"!


That episode is on right now its so funny!











HELLOOOOOOOOOOO MR BUSH!

 

[milefile]

Marge: "Chief Wiggam couldn catch a cold with . . . a . . . cold catching . . . thingie."

Homer: "See? It's hard when you don't use Millhouse."

 

[Firebird]

Snake after stealing a VCR:

"Oh NO! Beta!"

 

[eddieturner2002]

They must of been quoted before but my 3 favs are

Homer: (rolling down the road on a bookcase) Must kill Moe.....WEEEEEEE.....Must kill Moe.......WEEEEEEEE

and

Marge: But i fell in love with Homer Simpson, I dont want to snuggle with Max Power.
Homer: No-one snuggles with Max Power, they strap theirselves on and feel the jeeez.

and

Duffman: Duffman is thrusting in the direction of the problem

 

[Bollocks#999]

President Gerald Ford: Would you like to come over for the game and have Nachos and beer?

 

[kirkis9]

oh. no. duffman. cant. breathe.

who has the william shatner quotes?

 

[Rue]

I love the episode when Homer is supposed to ne concentrating on a very serious matter, he looks very sincere, but when the camera goes into his mind there's a chimpanzee dancing to the music Doctorin' the Tardis by the Timelords. Fantastic!

EDIT: Plus the entire Planet of the Apes skit. That's so funny! "He can talk! He can talk! I can siiiiing."

 

[SupraFly]

(Im not sure if these are 100% correct, but here goes.)

Homer:To start, press any key. Wheres the any key? Lets see, we have ctrl, alt, pg up, pg down, tab. Wow, this is hard work, i think ill just take something off my tab. Ooops, no time, works starting.

Ralph:MY dad said your dad went to a restaurant and ate all the food at the restaurant and they had to close the restaurant.

ME FAiL ENGLISH?! Thats unpossible!

I saw principal skinner and ms. krubople making babies ina broom closet and one of them looked up at me and smiled.

Duff man (yes duffman): Duff man cant breathe, OH NOOO!

-Vash
All i have for now.

 

[TaiLo]

Homer: "Hey, where's my tab?"

 

[Cap'n Jack]

marge:"Homer there's a bird on your head!"
Homer:"I know, he's grooming me"

 

[K7arkangel]

Ralph: "My cat's breath smells like catfood."

That's my favorite.

 

[Bollocks#999]

Originally posted by K7arkangel
Ralph: "My cat's breath smells like catfood."

That's my favorite.

This one has been mentioed before

Carl: But Moe, the dank the dank

 

[kirkis9]

homer to mr burns: yeah? will you send out the dogs, or maybe the bees? or will it be the dogs with bees in their mouths and when they bark they shoot bees at you.

the richard simmons robot was also great.

 

[Bollocks#999]

Apu: Where's a gun toting maniac when you need one?
Snake: Sorry I was in the can

 

[Bollocks#999]

Mr. Burns: Arrest the baby
Cheif Wiggum: Yeah right, nobody is gonna arrest a baby, except maybe in Texas

 

[tabs]

YVAN EHT NIOJ, YVAN EHT NIOJ . . . JOIN THE NAVY!

Bart: and i'll take up smoking, then give that up!
Homer: good for you son, quitting smoking is one of the hardest things you'll ever do. here's a dollar
Lisa: but he didn't do anything!
Homer: didn't he Lisa? didn't he? wait...he didn't!
*takes back money*

Homer: it's ok son, people die all the time. why, you could wake up dead tomorrow
Bart: *sits there with a scared look on his face*
Homer: Well, good night

 

[Sleek Stratos]

Originally posted by kirkis9

the richard simmons robot was also great.

Then when it shorts out.
Smithers: "Oh no, his ass is gonna explode!"

 

[tabs]

Originally posted by Sleek Stratos
Then when it shorts out.
Smithers: "Oh no, his ass is gonna explode!"

isn't it "Oh no, his ass is gonna blow!" ?

 

[Sleek Stratos]

Could be, I haven't seen that ep in ages.

 

[nk4e]

shake shake shake
shake shake shake ur booty

 

[milefile]

I always get a good laugh out of the episode where Homer has to go down the River Styx, with Lady playing and all the skeletons head-babging and Homer looking worried.

 

[nk4e]

when homer fell down the cliff and when they pick him up he started to hit the walls

 

[miniMADness]

Groundskeeper Willie: Lunchlady Doris, do you have any Grease?
Doris:Yes, Yes we do
Groundskeeper Willie: Well GREASE ME UP!!!! *rips his shirt off*

 

[millencolin]

Homer: when i wanted something badly, i just held my breath until my face turned blue. One time i woke up in the hospital and the doctor said i might have suffered brain damage.

Bart: Whats the point of that story?

Homer: i like stories

 

[kirkis9]

thats funny new episode?

 

[Cap'n Jack]

Homer on the phone:...I told you my baby beat me up...

 

[Cap'n Jack]

Mr. Burns:Hello lamp post what ya knowin Ive come to watch your power flowin.

 

[kirkis9]

dr nick: you see?, instead of toothpaste, use milkshakes. and if you dont know, just rub the food on paper/ if its clear its your window to sucess!

 

[Cap'n Jack]

I might find some funny quotes soon because I am watching my simpsons dvd's