GTP Cool Wall: 1988.5-1994 Pontiac Sunbird

[White & Nerdy]

I guess I just figured the Mini was at the level where a car will be slow no matter how light it is, barring out-and-out track cars like the Caterham. I'm not quite sure where that is, but 75 HP seems like a good cutoff.

 

[McLaren]

I don't know, I'd have to find some results sheets from showroom-stock and improved-touring type races in the early- and mid- 1990's. And I'm pretty sure most of those are gone. Rallying & road racing are not mainstream sports here, and GM already had a NASCAR competitor, not that NASCAR is relevant.

There is none because as you said, GM already had a competitor. There was a NASCAR built, but considering those are nothing but purpose-built chassis, it shared nothing in common with the actual production car besides reportedly having the V6 engine. But, a V6 in NASCAR automatically makes it uncool.

 

[White & Nerdy]

A NASCAR Sunbird?

PICS NOW

Edit: NVM, found it. And Richard Petty drove it, so it's automatically SZ.

 

[McLaren]

got word on the history of this car from a coworker who was the last owner of this particular car it was the first ever v6 busch car built by don letarte dad of none other than steve letarte . the guy that I work with jerry babb raced the car in 1989 at oxford and beech ridge speedways in maine it was originally an olds and when ole dick petty showd up he had a meltdown cuz he was on the Pontiac deal and a Camaro nose?? was fitted as a close resemblance

So, it was an Olds, then. Guess this is still the closest thing to a Sunbird's racing history.

 

[White & Nerdy]

Oh yes, I saw that

I'll admit, for a while I was vaguely considering doing a Bobby Lebonte #18 paint job. Older NASCAR liveries in general are so much better than the stuff they have now.

I still think this car couldv'e been raced in SCCA SSC or SSB competition, but as for finding evidence, good luck. Like I said, no one outside a small circle of participants remembers those races much after they happen.

 

[Joey D]

This thread couldn't have gone any better, W&N blows a gasket (again) and then proceeds to want to change the results.

 

[White & Nerdy]

Well, you gotta admit, the fact that an 84-87 Honda Civic Si, a car known for being sloooooooooooow despite being an Si and for being the predecessor of the official FnF-wannabe car, not only coming in higher than this but reaching the high side of Meh is pretty ridiculous.

 

[ImaRobot]

Well, you gotta admit, the fact that an 84-87 Honda Civic Si, a car known for being sloooooooooooow despite being an Si and for being the predecessor of the official FnF-wannabe car, not only coming in higher than this but reaching the high side of Meh is pretty ridiculous.

I think thats just being generous that this car even got close. Slow compared to what? certainly cant say the Sunbird.

 

[Bopop4]

Well, you gotta admit, the fact that an 84-87 Honda Civic Si, a car known for being sloooooooooooow despite being an Si and for being the predecessor of the official FnF-wannabe car, not only coming in higher than this but reaching the high side of Meh is pretty ridiculous.

The only thing ridiculous here is how someone thinks a Sunibrd is cooler than an actual cool car.

 

[Joey D]

Well, you gotta admit, the fact that an 84-87 Honda Civic Si, a car known for being sloooooooooooow despite being an Si and for being the predecessor of the official FnF-wannabe car, not only coming in higher than this but reaching the high side of Meh is pretty ridiculous.

The Civic SI has never been known for being slow by anyone who really knows anything about cars and doesn't have an ignorant prejudice for whatever reason. Also Fast and the Furious want-to-be's maybe could be used to describe the car in 2001 but I don't think that really happens anymore.

Also I think anything higher then the Seventh Level of Hell is pretty ridiculous for the Sunbird, with it's main champion being a closested Brony and all.

 

[White & Nerdy]

The 84-87 Civic is nowhere near cool. And it's not particularly fast either - in USDM form it had only 91 HP. The later Si models could vaguely be described as "fast" but the mid-80s model is pathetic.

 

[Roger the Horse]

Could be worse, its champion could be a fan of this:



Lucky Star fans make Bronies look like Kirby fans.





I'm trying to give W&N a new fandom to hate on, preferably one which has died out by now.

 

[White & Nerdy]

Knight Rider is also not known for sane, normal fans. In fact we could probably just extend that to anyone who's a "fan" of a TV show.

"Hmmmm... let's see what the KR fanbase has come up with..."

*sees heated flame-war over KITT's top speed in Super Pursuit Mode*

"Srsly? LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL"

 

[Joey D]

The 84-87 Civic is nowhere near cool. And it's not particularly fast either - in USDM form it had only 91 HP. The later Si models could vaguely be described as "fast" but the mid-80s model is pathetic.

I know you're thick and everything, but you do realize that horsepower doesn't equal fast right? The Si was light.

And the only thing pathetic is the Sunbird, because they're mostly driven by teenage girls that are more concerned with texting about how Jimmy is sleeping with Becky because OMGZ the SLUTZ!!! Actually it's funny that someone as manly as yourself drives a girl's car.

 

[White & Nerdy]

The convertible perhaps. The coupe and sedan seem to be driven by pretty normal people.

I've never seen a teenage girl driving an 88-94 J-car that I remember.

 

[sparkytooth]

Best non LFA car in the universal universe, nuff said.

Uncool.

 

[Joey D]

You're not normal, so that statement is false.

But I don't think I've ever seen a straight male drive one of these cars.

 

[Danny]

Jimmy is sleeping with Becky because OMGZ the SLUTZ!!!

For real?!

 

[sparkytooth]

Uncool simply because it's not an LFA.

 

[CarBastard]

I haven't been following the GTP cool wall for long so I've never understood the levels of dislike White and Nerdy gets here...but these last pages show me everything I need to know to join Joey and the rest of the guys here.

Seriously W&N, you're just making a fool of yourself with every post you make 👎.

 

[Kent]

The Derp meter is running high in this thread.
I mean, really, the Civic Si?

Edit: Tired of this...
The Sunbird is not cool.

 

[Joel]

When Toyota designs a car, they aren't so much apathetic towards fun as they are outright hostile towards anything resembling fun. The Camry is the penultimate expression of that design philosophy, hence the things I said about it. I hate it not just for what it does, but for what it is.

So what's the final expression of that philosophy if the Camry is the second to last? Has there only been one other car since the Camry that embodies this philosophy?

Hint: When you use big words to sound smart, make sure you understand what they mean first.

For example, the last section currently used on the cool wall (just after "Seriously Uncool") is called the dungeon, or outhouse. By my calculations, the Sunbird will end up in the penultimate section on the wall.

 

[White & Nerdy]

Perhaps penultimate wasn't exactly correct, as I mean second worst, not second last.

As for the worst...

Big surprise, right?

 

[McLaren]

The 84-87 Civic is nowhere near cool. And it's not particularly fast either - in USDM form it had only 91 HP. The later Si models could vaguely be described as "fast" but the mid-80s model is pathetic.

And yet, still a more historic racing car than yours.

 

[Blitz24]

It's almost as if we insulted the reason for existing by not voting this car sub-zero.

 

[Slash]

Oh yes, I saw that

I'll admit, for a while I was vaguely considering doing a Bobby Lebonte #18 paint job. Older NASCAR liveries in general are so much better than the stuff they have now.

You actually considered painting it that?

I still think this car couldv'e been raced in SCCA SSC or SSB competition, but as for finding evidence, good luck. Like I said, no one outside a small circle of participants remembers those races much after they happen.

Yes, because a terd of a car with a horrible chassis and terrible factory welds with a gutless engine and weak slushbox is going to hold up so well in a competition. Newsflash...have you seen how these things look on the street within just a few years? I've seen one, ONE car in the last, IDK how many years. The rest have been scrapped.

 

[ImaRobot]

You should be submitted to the ludicrous claims thread because your view on this car, and how high you place it compared to other cars, is just ridiculous.

 

[Badasp5.0]

Yes, because a terd of a car with a horrible chassis and terrible factory welds with a gutless engine and weak slushbox is going to hold up so well in a competition. Newsflash...have you seen how these things look on the street within just a few years? I've seen one, ONE car in the last, IDK how many years. The rest have been scrapped.

Its a cheap disposable car, built by a corporation that had a whole business model of making cheap disposable cars.

 

[Slash]

Its a cheap disposable car, built by a corporation that had a whole business model of making cheap disposable cars.

Couldn't have said it any better myself.

 

[Zenith]

Every car will have die hard fans because people cannot control the circumstances in which they receive their cars. I knew a guy who loved his 1990's Pontaic Bonneville to death and would repeatedly talk about how he prefers it to anything in the $30,000 bracket and under. Why did he have a Bonneville? It was his grandmother's car that she handed down to him when she could no longer drive.

But, as a naive car enthusiast, the Bonneville quickly became his ideal car. Suddenly he preferred understeer to oversteer, he started talking about the 200hp it (at one point maybe) had much the same way that W&N talks about the V6 in his car, and wanted to do a bunch of mods to a plastic 90's American failbox.

It's a bit like marrying your first girlfriend. Sometimes you get stuck with a fat chick who chews with her mouth open because she's the only one that would say yes and your brain was too desperate for love to care that she looks like a toad. You go on to have your "firsts" with her, you mentally mature as a member of a relationship, and suddenly you think that the reason all this happened is that she must be perfect, ignoring the fact that this happens to everyone in a first relationship.

So as you grow older you continuously go around telling all of your friends about how great she is. It quickly alienates everybody because you can't stop talking about how much better your girlfriend is than their's.

"No really, Steve the fat folds add to the experience!"

"John, you wouldn't know what I'm talking about, you've never dated a proper man's girl like Doradus."

Suddenly the entirety of your romantic life, your sexual preferences, what you look for in a woman, becomes a shell around this girl because you are too stubborn to understand that not everything you get needs to be perfect the first time.