GTP's Worst 10 Movies... Ever!

  • Thread starter Famine
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Just barely avoided my list. The director is a jerk if anything. I remember him specifically saying horror movie directors are slacking because their plots are just getting boring.
Hostel isn't a horror movie. It's little more than torture-porn; we spend two hours watching pretty little twenty-somethings - and they're usually women - getting hacked and slashed up in increasingly violent and creative ways. It's downright misogynistic at best.
 
Hostel isn't a horror movie. It's little more than torture-porn; we spend two hours watching pretty little twenty-somethings - and they're usually women - getting hacked and slashed up in increasingly violent and creative ways. It's downright misogynistic at best.
I know, and I agree with you. Which is why I said Eli is a jerk at the least for saying such a thing.
 
Well it was about one sorry fat ass emo that couldn't deal with his own nationality so he goes and
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over his own country for what? He had to go call the Americans to save his ass because he was too chicken
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to deal with it himself. His actions were what led to the downfall of Japanese culture. I hated everything about the film too.

What?! I think there's a lot of historical cultural subtext that you are not getting here and helps when viewing this movie. You should probably brush up on your japanese history (meiji restoration, satsuma rebellion, etc) and then revisit the movie and your post.

I liked the movie. It had some good swordwork. ;)
 
Last Samurai was good. I know lots of people dont like Tom Cruise, but he has done much worse films. M:I:3 for one.

I've noticed a trend that people are voting for lots of new films. Think harder before you post newer films. You probably think there that bad cause you have watched them recently. I could have quite easily said Juno, Jumper or Captivity. All recent, all terrible/boring. But i know there are much worse films out there.
 
4. Hitchikers guide to the galaxy

Seriously? Like, really seriously?

Are you really serious Loon? :boggled:

That movie was an abomination. It's out-and-out Hollywoodisation in all it's shameful horror, and a movie which Douglas Adams would not have allowed to have been made. 👎
It's no coincidence that rumours of a Hitchikers movie had been circulating for years and years, ever since the original radio series, books and TV series, but Douglas would never compromise on the movie since he wanted it to remain true to his original works, and yet strangely enough less that 2 years after his death the release that crap for theatres. :yuck:
Douglas (R.I.P.) must've turned in his grave.
Hitchiker Guide To The Galaxy, the movie gets a nomination from me too. :ill:

I'm with Duke on the trailer thing, my wife & I always sit through the trailers before movies or DVDs and are usually in agreement on most trailers, if it looks like it sucks, or that all the best bits/funniest lines are in the trailer, then chances are it's not worth watching the other 90 minutes of "filler", and hence having not seen them, I can't vote for them.

A second movie I should nominate is:
Bad Boys 2.
Plotless excuse for a shoot-'em up at every juncture, and with the stupidest line in a movie ever, when one of Will Smith or Martin Lawrence says that it's a wonder no-one was injured or killed in the initial car chase! You've just seen an offshore-powerboat drop off a moving trailer and pass engines-first through the front window of a Cadillac sedan at freeway speed. Unless that car was remote controlled, there's no way the front passengers of that car were anything but people-pâté!
 
I am with Duke too, I usually don't see a lot of movies because of a trailer I see. If I don't like whats in the trailer then there isn't much chance I will enjoy the film.

I enjoyed Last Samurai, thought it was one of Tom Cruises better recent movies.

Anyway, I can think of two movies that I didn't think much of...

Ultraviolet - Thought Equilibrium was an interesting movie, so thought this would be too. It was not.
Miami Vice - Found this movie so boring that I didn't even get half way through.

I will try and think of some more, but I usually forget about movies I don't like.
 
Are you really serious Loon? :boggled:

That movie was an abomination. It's out-and-out Hollywoodisation in all it's shameful horror, and a movie which Douglas Adams would not have allowed to have been made. 👎
It's no coincidence that rumours of a Hitchikers movie had been circulating for years and years, ever since the original radio series, books and TV series, but Douglas would never compromise on the movie since he wanted it to remain true to his original works, and yet strangely enough less that 2 years after his death the release that crap for theatres. :yuck:
Douglas (R.I.P.) must've turned in his grave.
Hitchiker Guide To The Galaxy, the movie gets a nomination from me too. :ill:

For a moment there, I thought you meant the original movie that held to the book like a vogon to a grudge. But for scaring me, you get an e-slap. [/e-slap]
 
555
(snip) I've noticed a trend that people are voting for lots of new films. Think harder before you post newer films. You probably think there that bad cause you have watched them recently.... (snip)

+1

Are you really serious Loon? :boggled:

That movie was an abomination. It's out-and-out Hollywoodisation in all it's shameful horror, and a movie which Douglas Adams would not have allowed to have been made. 👎
It's no coincidence that rumours of a Hitchikers movie had been circulating for years and years, ever since the original radio series, books and TV series, but Douglas would never compromise on the movie since he wanted it to remain true to his original works, and yet strangely enough less that 2 years after his death the release that crap for theatres. :yuck:
Douglas (R.I.P.) must've turned in his grave.
Hitchiker Guide To The Galaxy, the movie gets a nomination from me too. :ill:

Actually, being a fan of the books (I have two or three copies of some of them, plus the compilation), I really didn't know what to think of the movie... at best, it left something to be desired, at worst, it just didn't feel as funny as the books, and felt like a complete cop-out.

I'm with Duke on the trailer thing, my wife & I always sit through the trailers before movies or DVDs and are usually in agreement on most trailers, if it looks like it sucks, or that all the best bits/funniest lines are in the trailer, then chances are it's not worth watching the other 90 minutes of "filler", and hence having not seen them, I can't vote for them.

A second movie I should nominate is:
Bad Boys 2.
Plotless excuse for a shoot-'em up at every juncture, and with the stupidest line in a movie ever, when one of Will Smith or Martin Lawrence says that it's a wonder no-one was injured or killed in the initial car chase! You've just seen an offshore-powerboat drop off a moving trailer and pass engines-first through the front window of a Cadillac sedan at freeway speed. Unless that car was remote controlled, there's no way the front passengers of that car were anything but people-pâté!

Surprised you actually watched it, then, if you're a trailer junkie like me... my wife and I enter theaters early just to watch trailers and plan our next trip. I took one look at the trailer and thought: "No way is that going to be anywhere near as awesome as the first.

Bad Boys I wasn't a great movie, but it was so much fun, you don't really care.
 
Surprised you actually watched it, then, if you're a trailer junkie like me... my wife and I enter theaters early just to watch trailers and plan our next trip. I took one look at the trailer and thought: "No way is that going to be anywhere near as awesome as the first.

Bad Boys I wasn't a great movie, but it was so much fun, you don't really care.

Sadly, my wife is a Will Smith Junkie, so I was dragged out to the cinema to see it! The trailer looked feckin' awful, but I heard earfuls of "But it's Will!" for weeks before it arrived, and I was vindicated in the fact that she was appalled by the violence levels and lack of naked Smith torso! :lol:
Bad Boys I was excusable since it hadn't been done before, (Well, at least not by the same cast & crew) and wasn't too awful (although not in my opinion a great movie, but definitely not one of the worst!)

As far as the Hitchikers thing goes, people that saw the movie and thought that was it, will forever think that it's a kitschy, crap story about an Englishman & some aliens.
Those who've grown up with the radio series and the books (which I used to read once a year, but haven't for a few now being as they're mostly committed to memory!) know that the film is a hapless attempt to keep a cinema audience entertained for almost 2 hours while doing no justice to the original texts, and as such is a cack interpretation of things. :yuck:
I'm glad you've appreciated the books niky and seen the best side of his trilogy of five books. :confused: :lol:

For a moment there, I thought you meant the original movie that held to the book like a vogon to a grudge. But for scaring me, you get an e-slap. [/e-slap]

Are you sure you mean original movie? Or all 6 episodes of the original 1982 TV series which just about covered the first 2 books, that you may have seen in their 3hour entirety all in one go? The ones with David Dixon, as the staggeringly well represented Ford Prefect with "intense blue eyes that didn't seem to blink often enough" as opposed to the staggeringly un-well represented Mos Def whose eyes aren't blue even if you've smoked a whole pipe-full of crack!
I'll [e-slap] you back when you can come round here and quote Vogon poetry at me! :lol: (It's just one of those things stuck somewhere in the recesses of my mind that I can recall pretty much on request! :rolleyes:)
 
Briefly explain?

Okay.

The Pursuit of Happyness was total ghack.
Terminator 3 was total ghack.


Good calls on H2G2, Bad Boys 2 (hey - did y'all notice Martin Lawrence is black? Isn't that hysterical?!?!!!) and Miami Vice (the only film ever I've had to put subtitles on just to be able to grasp the dialogue).
 
1. Napoleon Dynamite
2. Code 46
3. Cube 2: Hypercube
4. Epic Movie
5. The Godfather
6. Point Break
7. Half Past Dead 2
8. Flight of the Phoenix (2004)
9. American Pie Presents: The Naked Mile
10. All Dennis Quaid Films
 
I for one liked Hitchiker's Guide... I thought the concept was pretty fresh and quite unexpected. Although I'll have to confess I never read the book.

Casio
All Dennis Quaid Films

Awwww, come on. Inner Space was awesome...
 
...and lack of naked Smith torso! :lol:

RE: Wives: I have three words: Van Damne's Butt. We've watched many a ghastly film for that reason alone. :lol:

I'm glad you've appreciated the books niky and seen the best side of his trilogy of five books. :confused: :lol:

I even bought the two Dirk Gently Books. And I've got one of the newer Hitchhiker collections with "Young Zaphod Plays it Safe". Still looking for the collection "Salmon of a Doubt". Yes, a five book trilogy is distressing... but then it fits the Hitchhiker mythos completely. :lol:

My wife hates the books. Absolutely. Could never get British Humor... :lol:
 
wasn't that one with Charlie Sheen and Clint Eastwood?

Speaking of which, which one starred Dennis Quaid, Stealing Home or Field of Dreams... or neither? :odd:

There are two movies labeled "The Rookie" and the one I'm talking about is the baseball movie. A great movie, if you haven't seen it yet. "It's your turn, coach."
 
What?! I think there's a lot of historical cultural subtext that you are not getting here and helps when viewing this movie. You should probably brush up on your japanese history (meiji restoration, satsuma rebellion, etc) and then revisit the movie and your post.

I liked the movie. It had some good swordwork. ;)

Meh... he came off like a traitor that's all I gotta say. I didn't say it was a bad movie but TC and stuff wasn't helping at all.

Ultraviolet - Thought Equilibrium was an interesting movie, so thought this would be too. It was not.

lol, I could see how you'd think that but then again, you should be ashamed of yourself too. :P
 
The Godfather in the worst movies of all time, Casio, are you serious. That movie is a classic and rightly so.
 
The Pursuit of Happyness was total ghack.
Terminator 3 was total ghack.

You merely stated that they were 'total ghack', but explained not why they were 'total ghack'. Honestly, what reasons do you give for them being 'ghack'?
 
You merely stated that they were 'total ghack', but explained not why they were 'total ghack'. Honestly, what reasons do you give for them being 'ghack'?

You asked for a "brief explanation"! It doesn't come more brief than that!
Now you're asking for reasons as to why his "brief explanation" is "total ghack". :lol:

Anyway, back on topic, I just thought of another film/s:

Speed.
Speed 2: Cruise Control.

While the second was undoubtably the crapper of the 2, the first one wasn't exactly a masterpiece of cinematography!
 
Bad Boys 2 is class! And for whoever tried to quote the "nobody died" line. Thats wrong. Joe Pataliano (there boss) says "thank god no cops died".

I agree with Hitchikers. Was very bored by it.
 
Given the reasons (bad acting, directing, scripting) he cited, I wouldn't be in a hurry to argue. Jar Jar Binks alone makes You Got Served look like The French Connection.

What is it that makes EpI-III a "crazy" choice, but the similarly pretty and heavily flawed "Pearl Harbor" worthy of your choice?
As a WWII buff(see my username :D), I think I just found the events in the movie ridiculous. By the final bombing mission in Japan(I think it ended in China), I was very bitter. Granted, like VIP3R noted, the selection was from a cop out list that I pretty much stole from the "internet", but Pearl Harbor also featured horrid acting & that "Michael Bay" over the topness that I almost always dispise.

It's funny, when you mention Jar Jar, the criticism on the I-III, especially the Episode I sounds pretty valid. I still don't see it anywhere close to the "Worst 10", but I suppose my "bars" could've been set a bit higher for Pearl Harbor, just like how I accused the I-III haters of doing to the Star Wars. :sly:

P.S. Props to people who voted for "Ultra Violet" & "Battlefield Earth". I just finished watching Battlefield Earth, and it definitely qualifies. :guilty: Famine, how can I swap one of my original selections? Do I just edit my post that has my "Worst 10"? I definitely need to add Ultra Violet to it.
 
As a WWII buff(see my username :D), I think I just found the events in the movie ridiculous.

Then for the love of trees don't even think about watching U-571...

It's funny, when you mention Jar Jar, the criticism on the I-III, especially the Episode I sounds pretty valid. I still don't see it anywhere close to the "Worst 10", but I suppose my "bars" could've been set a bit higher for Pearl Harbor, just like how I accused the I-III haters of doing to the Star Wars. :sly:

Even if you ignore IV-VI completely - they're quite hard to follow, I-III are appalling. We're asked to believe that a moralistic but headstrong young man instantly becomes an amoral, subserviant one. That all the power in the universe is dependant on tiny biological organisms, but allow inorganic objects to be manipulated (Yoda says that the Force flows through ALL things, not just organic ones). That a girl actually says "You're breaking my heart" out loud...

It's style over substance tosh. They hope we'll be distracted by the pretty things that played a supporting role in the previous films and not notice the appalling kicking to death they deliver to the script and storyline.

If anything they deserve their ranking more than the others. I'd buy a 6-film DVD set just so I could have a nice DVD set with IV-VI in it, and never watch I-III.


Famine, how can I swap one of my original selections? Do I just edit my post that has my "Worst 10"? I definitely need to add Ultra Violet to it.

Just edit it. I'll lock the thread before I do my Excel file and post the Poll, then unlock it again to allow further discussion.

You merely stated that they were 'total ghack', but explained not why they were 'total ghack'. Honestly, what reasons do you give for them being 'ghack'?

As Smallhorses said, you asked for a brief explanation... Do I have to offer up a "Famine's Review" thread for each in order to explain in full that Terminator 3 was cynical, inept, turgid, foetus barf?
 
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